Living with other families to reduce costs of living

[Ohnoohdear]

Does anyone with kids here live with another family with kids (or more than one) like friends/family members? I’ve always liked the thought of doing this as I love a busy household and that way rent etc would be cheaper and also could help eachother with child care and be better off financially due to be able to work more.

I come from a large family and grew up with a lot of people. Big dinners, lots of activities and buzz, never really alone. I’ve lived with family members as an adult and it has worked well. I’m now living with my DP and toddler son and feel lonely. I miss being part of a bigger community.

AIBU to think that this may be the way forward as the economy is making it difficult for families to manage? At least temporarily when the kids are in school.

Does anyone have experience with this scenario?

Sounds awful

We can’t really afford having more than one child so I really grieve the reality of missing out on having a large family!

Haha fair, I totally understand that it’s not for everyone! It’s just how I grew up so I miss it :)

Sounds like my idea of hell.

It would definitely be hell for the other family with my kids! 😂

Sounds like my idea of hell

Above comment was for SpinningFloppa!

I'd absolutely hate it. Never having the house to myself, lack of privacy and nowhere to be within my own family, other people's mess. No thanks.

I don't see how there would be any financial benefit considering it would require very large property hence large heating bills, and so on, if I am honest.
Plus stepping on each others toes...

Or do you mean like multign houses with separate units?

Personally I couldn't think of anything worse, but if you like that kind of environment and there is someone you know you could live with I can see why it might work in theory.

Not sure it would work in practice though as you would need a bigger property so there would be higher rent/bills to be split

The thought of constant noise, buzz and never being alone makes me feel ill.

Also other peoples kids -no thanks

We did when growing up. One Aunt, Uncle and two cousins and then Nan and a different Aunt.
it was normal to us and it was fun but I wouldn't like it now!

I couldn’t handle it , I need my space but I do understand how difficult it is to grow up in a busy house and then be lonely later on. I think that’s why I kept having kids! My family home is quite mad!!

I get what you're saying OP. I think if the house was big enough and there was still room to have my own space I would love to live with my family, my parents and my sibling and their family!

Totally can see the benefits with childcare etc. and just the whole bustle of a full house.

It's not for everyone but I think if you have the right family it could work really well!

I would loathe this entirely

My idea of utter hell. Don't want anyone else's kids and tantrums to deal with too. And the mess and noise..no thank you.

It's enough graft keeping house with my lot. Wouldn't want to double or treble that.

Sounds like hell. Nothing will be cheaper. You'd need an colossally big house to house two couples plus multiple children. Plus bills and food expensive on top.

I grew up in a big family , it made me the opposite to you @Ohnoohdear . I love being alone

I totally get that it would be difficult and unthinkable for many people!

I really haven’t been doing the maths, I’m just doing some dreaming whilst DS is asleep..

Many other cultures manage to live several generations under one roof so thought it could be applied here too. In theory splitting 1 rent in between 2 families would be cheaper, also yes - heating costs and other utilities would be more but perhaps not double? Also as long as everyone ate the same main meals there could be cost cutting with big batch cooking etc.

The big one would be child care if kids are tiny. If there are for example 4 adults (that you trust!) there could be big savings if they have alternate days off and share watching the kids.

Surely there could also be social gains from clubbing 2 small families together where the kids don’t have siblings.

Literally sounds like hell, frankly I'd rather not survive if that's what survival would need to look like in the future.

This is, of course, the point of multigenerational households, saves costs and divides the work. MIL is beginning to do this now she's widowed and lives alone, she either stays with us or SIL for long periods of time or she has visitors for long periods of time. She's in her 80s, and a lovely house guest so it works for us and she loves spending time with the DC. It very much depends on the personalities concerned of course. My mother would drive me mad!

@Ohnoohdear you're right - costs wouldn't necessarily double just because you have 2 families, there would def be savings. Council Tax, TV/Internet etc. would all be shared.

Maybe even move to more of a car share model amongst the family to save on monthly car payment costs.

My cousin is moving in with both sets of parents and siblings in a multigenerational household. My idea of hell but they all seem happy about it.

Definitely not commune material. Nothing wrong with it if that's what you're into like.

Friends growing up had this arrangement, two families with three generations of each in a massive house, huge gardens, pool, a decent amount of land and outbuildings, and a few old servants flats they rented out etc

It all ended in tears when one set of family circumstances changed such that they couldn’t afford to stay, the other couldn’t afford to buy them out, finished with two
divorces and two sets of kids who struggle to understand why they can’t achieve the quality of life they had growing up.

The house in question was big enough to
provide enough space for it to work until one person couldn’t pay their part of the bills.