To be fuming..

[sarah8484]

Im at work, dp is at home with our dc 9 months and 13 years. 13 year old is off school sick. Ive just messaged ds on my lunch to see how he is and he has messaged back and said my dp (their dad) had left my 13 year old alone to watch my 9 month old while he went out for 10 minutes. Ive never gave my 13 year old that responsibility before. He said she was playing and he said be back in 10 minutes and just left. Im not going to say anything till im home but can't believe he actually did that!

It would depend on what he was doing.

If he was just taking the bins out or cleaning the car then I’d have no problem.

If he was going to the shop then I would.

Not only has DS not had this responsibility before but he’s also ill.
It’s not fair he’s being made to babysit when he’s ill, regardless of how sensible he is.

I was babysitting at that age myself - but looking back, all I'd have been good for in an emergency is ringing my own mother to sort out whatever it was that was the problem.
Watching a baby for 10 mins while you nip out to the corner shop - yes, probably fine. As long as it was 10 mins and not "10 mins" and also I would need to factor in how sick the 13yo actually was to determine if HWBU.

My parents would always go out on a Friday, leaving me (13) and little sister (8) on our own for 3 or 4 hours. We loved it, I would cook a meal and then we’d stay up and watch TV. Mind you, this was in the Dark Ages when most parents were guilty of benign neglect. (Though it never did us any harm 😀).

Going by the threads going back several years, with you concerned your partner is cheating, then you split, then he impregnated someone else, three months later you got back together and now you've had another baby, you'd wonder why you actually had another child with him to begin with, given several years ago you said you felt like a single mum.

Why are you the only one who gets to decide what the children can do?

Of course this is fine.

1. Whether its right or not there are plenty of 13/14 year-olds out there having babies
2. Its 10mins. Surely knows how to keep a baby vaguely entertained for 10mins
3. Surely hes sensible enough to know that if your DH isnt back after the 10mins to give him a call to check where he is. If he doesnt answer he calls you or a family member?!

Isnt the babysitting age 14? So if you can be in charge of someone elses child at 14 surely you can sit in a room for 10 mins with the one you live with

Christ when I was 13 I was looking after someone's kids during the summer holidays whilst they worked for like 4 hours. A 6 month old and a 2 year old. Which is horrendous I know.. but you're losing your shit over 10 minutes. I think you need a grip

Wow that's some serious internet stalking going on there!

OP I think it is a bit of an over reaction and I'd handle it carefully. Just have a chat over what you both think is appropriate.

Ask think some of the comments on here are a bit of an over reaction too.

Trust me you had better and more responsible parents than the parents kids have these days that see them go off to uni barely able to operate a toaster or scared out of their mind at having to spend a night alone. Parenting was a lot better then than it is now.

You’re completely overreacting OP but I suspect you know that and aren’t coming back.

Ive never gave my 13 year old that responsibility before.

Why on earth not OP?

Jeezus, what on Earth prompted you to dig up her history on this question?! That’s creepy.

I was given that responsibility at 13, for trips out! And it made me feel very trusted and valued, and I chipped in far more than I would of having been made to feel I was capable.

Give him a pass, no harm done 🙂

My sensible 14 yo is home ill today. Usually she’s great at babysitting but I wouldn’t leave her in charge of a goldfish today as she’s got flu and is really unwell. So for me it depends on how ill dc is but if just a bit under the weather then I’d be worried if a 13 yo couldn’t look after a sibling for 10 minutes.

I cannot believe you even have an issue over this !!

Well unless the OP is going to return with a massive drip-feed....

I'd say the majority of 13 year olds would be able to look after their 9 month old sibling for 10 minutes.

I won’t even have a kettle in the house, or anything that gets warm. We only only eat cold or room temp food

I was babysitting younger sibling all day at age 13, tbh.

He’s 13. Looking after his sibling for 10 minutes.
it’s not an issue.

I never understand why thread like these run to so many pages. The OP hasn’t bothered to come back to the thread, yet there’s 100 identical comments because no-one can actually RTFT and realise that many, many people have already posted the same damn thing.

Honestly, does everyone posting “he’s 13, it’s not a problem” think they are the first person to come up with that?

How do you manage the mandatory Mumsnet roast dinners? You do realize that the lack thereof is child abuse?

13 is a teenager. We went out to dinner while staying at my brothers and their dc babysat ours who were 4 & 15 months. It was the 11 yo who jumped in and changed the pooey nappies etc. At 11 I was taking care of my 2wo baby sister while mum and dad did other things in the house, this seems a non event!