To think sending your child to nursery, ill is selfish

[Anon778833]

If my toddler is ill, I do not send her into nursery - it’s as simple as that. If I have to not go into work, that’s just how it is.

There has been an outbreak of slapped cheek at my daughter’s nursery which she caught and now I also have caught too. And it’s a really horrible virus. My poor dd hasn’t eaten for nearly a week. And she is STILL spiking temperature.

Nursery sent out a message to say that thanks to people bringing ill children to nursery, they now have staff shortages. And that people must not bring ill kids to nursery.

I thought this was common sense.

@MondaysChild7 why don't you answer my question?

You are very very vocal on your thread and have a lot of judgement to share - so answer one question with honesty - do you get paid when your kids are home unwell?If you don't, how do you still pay the nursery fees that are still due?

So why did the nursery accept the child in if it was so obvious that the child was poorly?

You're initial complaint was slapped cheek, so what happened at handover when an evidently ill child with slapped cheek was allowed in?

And if parents are handing children over with fevers, again why isn't your nursery handing them straight back?

It does work both ways. Nurseries have policies, parents are expected to follow the policies, but, for example last weekend my daughter was fine all morning - we went out, having a lovely day then in the afternoon she went downhill with a fever fast. It happened over the course of an hour. It was a weekend so no issue, but had it been a nursery day I would have had no reason to believe she wasn't well at drop off because 11am that morning she was stuffing her face with pancakes and running around soft play. So I give parents the benefit of the doubt in these circumstances that a child can become unwell over the course of the day as I would hope the nursery would too.

But had that happened during a nursery day I would expect the nursery to call me if my DD became unwell and I would collect her.
I'd be really annoyed if my nursery during handover took in a child who is clearly unwell, with a fever and slapped cheek syndrome.

Why aren't you more upset with the nursery? An angry email to parents is really passive aggressive, why don't you want nursery to be stringent about enforcing their policy on the door?

A parent usually knows best if their child is unwell and it’s really not on to put the responsibility onto the nursery to know when handover takes a few seconds. By the time the staff realises, the parent has dumped and run.

As has been discussed, there are situations where children seem ok in the morning but are very unwell by lunchtime which can’t be helped. This has happened to me as well and in such a situation, I collected my child within 20 minutes, not hours and hours like one person said happens.

Children do catch illness at nurseries and school that is normal. Most of the time it’s spreading before they even know they are ill so there isn’t much you can do. In the long run it builds up their immune systems. Most parents won’t send them in if they know they are poorly beforehand. YABU

Oh it's awful. Where I work we've had covid doing the rounds and a vomiting bug last week.

We're mopping up sick and comforting poorly children and trying to keep the other kids away while we wait for someone to pick up. It's like herding cats trying to keep 3 year olds away from a pile of vomit whilst wiping runny bums.

Then we catch it, pass it to our own kids and partners, and have 2 lots of statutory sick pay to look forward to 😥

I'm curious as to if you take you a sick day every time your Ill or leave early because you've become Ill during the work day?

For the third time. You are answering other posts and ignoring this

@MondaysChild7 why don't you answer my question?

You are very very vocal on your thread and have a lot of judgement to share - so answer one question with honesty - do you get paid when your kids are home unwell?If you don't, how do you still pay the nursery fees that are still due?

No words.

Yes I do. Or my child’s father does. The buck stops with us - we created them.

And do you get paid, or does your partner if they take time off?

I don’t need to answer your questions. I don’t need to explain to you how I afford nursery fees or anything else. Most people are in agreement with me, it seems.

Not your child, I'm asking if YOU take sick days or leave early when YOU are Ill or become Ill during the day

Yes!

You have answered my question. You take time off because you can afford it. Lots and lots of judgement and zero empathy or compassion. Really unpleasant post but you carry on gleefully wearing your "but most people agree with me!" badge

Mmm very understanding work place that you work for, very rare company that you can take sick days and leave when your child is Ill and still work for them.

This is definitely one of those situations where it is easy to gloat without understanding how privileged you are.

God forbid you ever end up in a situation where your DH is no longer around for whatever reason and you find yourself in insecure work.

It's always easy to judge from a place of privilege.

It's always better to use critical thinking skills using empathy towards others to understand the reasons they do this instead of waging your judgemental finger.

Well if you read my posts, you’ll see that I had one employer who bullied ill people into work. It is unfortunate that some employers are arseholes but that doesn’t mean it’s ok for you to cause all kinds of problems for everyone else, make other people ill, make your child suffer and cause staff shortages at provisions. 🤷🏻‍♀️

And you have no empathy either it seems for people who might have a miscarriage because you think it’s your god given right to dump a sick child in a provision?
That's extreme.

I am not privileged at all. I have a disability and I also have two disabled children. I’m not so entitled that I think it’s ok to ignore the rules about illness. Because it impacts everyone and serves you and your child no purpose.

Hmmmm I'm torn on this one I don't think parents should send their kids in if they have D&V or obviously just broken out in chicken pox etc but many illnesses are most contagious before any real symptoms start and it also depends on the child.

I have a child who has a overactive immune response any exposure even to a cold gives him a fever but you wouldn't know it unless you stood with a thermometer or he goes over 39.5!
He can happily play at 38.5 and be absolutely fine. He has fooled many a Dr til they take his temp and look at him baffled and say that should be flooring him!
We never send him if he's unwell in himself so if he says he feels ill or is curled up etc

He's been checked multiple times and just told its what his body does!

And you have no empathy either it seems for people who might have a miscarriage because you think it’s your god given right to dump a sick child in a provision?

Ridiculous hyperbole OP. For every one of your theoretical examples of a worst case scenario, there's another theoretical example of a person who doesn't live in your padded middle class bubble and has too much time off so loses their job and then their home

I had a frank chat with my manager because I’ve barely had a week without a child being sick since term started.

He told me to do what I had to, he knows my work is done well, appreciates me and isn’t concerned. No absence forms, no disciplinary, just compassion.

Plenty of bosses aren’t arseholes. It should be the norm and we need to start expecting better treatment rather than being grateful for scraps.

You don’t have to be middle class or privileged to behave like a decent person. Clearly, this thread has touched a nerve. But maybe you should ask yourself why you are in the minority with your opinions?

Also, it’s not hypothetical - if you read the thread properly and see that someone had a miscarriage due to slapped cheek. A lot of people have underlying health issues, including me. If I were to die of covid I would be said to have had underlying health issues.