To leave 2 year old and 10 month old alone for a week?

[PrueHalliwell]

Well not alone obviously but with their grandma?

I'm 30 this month but on my birthday I'll be 38 weeks pregnant so that rules out anything exciting happening (unless I give birth! That'd be lovely)

So my husband has suggested we go for a week away next year to universal Florida as we both love it there ( we are big kids) but we don't think it'll be appropriate for a 2 year old and a 10 month old just yet plus would be nice to actually spend some time as a couple and I was really excited about it but now the mum guilt has started to creep in and I've started to feel really bad about leaving them.

My MIL has a good bond with my DS and DD isn't born yet but I'm sure they'll be okay - she's happy to look after them and they will be staying at our house with her and I'll know they'll be safe and have a good week but is it really selfish?

I just wanted to see what others thought before booking the holiday.

Thank you

but it’s not a ‘could’

if you can’t find one example of something happening it’s not something that ‘could’ happen.

"there are nutters on here who haven’t left their teens with anyone overnight before, they’ll be on here soon saying you’re being selfish"

It is true that some people hang on to kids till they're almost 30, but O think it's healthy for them to stay elsewhere if it's a healthy place, for a night or a week.
It keeps you sane too, especially after giving birth to no. 2.

I left mine at 6 months old (40th) and flew to the states for a week. They stayed with their grandparents. I was hesitant when I left for the airport (surprise from DH) but knew they were in good hands. Everyone is different tho but in my opinion, go and enjoy yourself whilst you still can before they get older

I wouldn’t have done it because:
I was still breastfeeding at ten months
Neither child was sleeping through the night at those ages, the ten month old in particular was waking several times a night and was very difficult to settle, and I couldn’t have asked anyone to take that on for a week
I couldn’t have been so far away from them and enjoyed a holiday

Universal is full of children, including ones the ages yours will be, as loads of people go there as well when on a Disney trip. In your shoes, I think that might exacerbate the mum guilt and spoil it bit. (Not saying it should, just that it might!) I'd be more comfortable on an adult only holiday I know they'd hate, rather than having to watch other DC splashing in the fountains and on one fish two fish (if that's still there!)

Unfortunately many on here have 0 understanding around attachment theory and spout their opinion on the matter as if it’s fact.

I’d take the kids!

I have a friend who left her 11 month old for a weeks holiday with her husband and in a few days I will be leaving my 15 month old with grandparents for a 5 day trip with my husband. I wouldn't have been ready to leave my 11 month old when my friend did but she had a great time, didn't miss her DD so much it impacted on her enjoying the holiday and had a wonderful reunion when they got back. Her DD had a lovely time with grandparents and I have no doubt my DD will love being with grandparents this weekend when she gets spoiled. It's up to you when you feel ready, if you think you'll feel ready to go for a week when your baby is 10 months old... Go for it!! Any judgement and guilt over what you think you should be doing is ridiculous. Do what's right for you.

Saying that someone else's experience is "ridiculous" does not make your own opinion any more valid.

OP asked for opinions, and has had a variety of them. Only she can know how her children will react, how close they are to her MIL etc. But nobody benefits from mothers belittling one another for the way they have brought up their children, or sneering at mothers who didn't have local family who could spend time with their children.

I would but I wouldn't go to Disney because I'd feel sad not taking the kids

The 10 month old will be at prime attachment establishment age. Also a full week of primary carers being absent would be very tough on a two-year-old. Neither of them would have any understanding of why both PCGs suddenly went missing for so long. In terms of child development, it’s a terrible idea.

Good thing they’re not planning to go to Disney then isn’t it

I'm not going to Disney but I just wanted to mention that when the children are older (and depending on how expensive it is because prices are constantly rising over there) they will be going on holidays and probably to Disney - I just don't think they'd get much out of it at 2 and 10 months old, I'd probably think about taking them when little ones off formula to Disneyland Paris in the summer but honestly my 2 year old didn't like ceebies land he was happy in Spain, in the pool, soft play, on the dance floor so I'm not sure he'd even care if he knew haha

Actually 10 months is prime attachment widening age, by 10 months primary attachments would have already formed and most babies would be onto broadening their horizons and building attachments to others.

but do continue posting inaccurate crap.

I think parents need breaks - but young children get sick/ teething want their mums etc all the time - I just couldn't be that far away from a baby especially the little one.

When my daughter was 5 she went from mild bug to full blown pneumonia, on oxygen, barely conscious - I had been meant to be away that weekend at a 40th and it gave me the shivers to think of being out of it (it was going to be very very drunken/ drugs etc) - I just think if you are away - one parent needs to be able to get back quickly when they are that little. agree - stick to europe.

Remember though children are free under the age of 3! As someone who has taken (and does take) their children to Florida a lot there is plenty out there.

Only you can decide really. I personally wouldn't have done it, especially not so far away.
My DH went away for a week, and when he got back our 18 month old wouldn't look at him for ages. Then she cried, then the laid on him and hugged him for about an hour. It was quite sweet but made me realise how strong their feelings are and how much they do understand.

Yes, you would be very unreasonable for all the reasons mentioned by other posters.

I couldn’t do it and wouldn’t want to. My husband and I went to Disney and Universal Studios before we had children (we live in USA). Relatives gave us a week’s stay in their condo there for our wedding anniversary, else it wouldn’t have been something we’d choose to do. It was fun but I don’t like such crowded commercialized places for vacations.

I couldn’t leave children that young. I breastfed my son so that would have been a factor too. You’d be so far away. If something happened it would take a long time to get back. Since it is a family destination, I’d wait until the children were a bit older so they could enjoy it too. Perhaps a three day holiday somewhere closer in, to a place you’d be equally excited to go, if you’re really set on getting away.

However, it is good to set aside time for you both as a couple, and your husband has suggested it so it is something you both need. So definitely a couple’s holiday. You could do Florida when your youngest is 2 or 3. Not really that long to wait, those years fly by.

RNRTFT, but the tinies won't remember any of this, so if you are happy with the arrangements, swan off and enjoy it.

Personally no (but I was breastfeeding still and wouldn’t be able to be away from my baby that long unless I wanted to pump all the time and that’s not a relaxing holiday!!) I wouldn’t really be comfortable leaving my now four year old for a week, a couple of nights would be ok but he would be upset being left for a week as he is very much a mummy’s boy. All kids are different though and no judgement if others are happy to leave theirs with good friends /grandparents. You won’t know how you will feel yet until the baby’s born so maybe will need to book it nearer to the time.

Personally I wouldn't. I went away when mine were 4 and 2 and I cried all the way to the airport. I left them with DH who is great with the kids but the guilt was too much. However....once I was on holiday I had a great time and came back so mentally and physically fresh. If I had my time again I wouldn't have gone as I know they were really upset and missed me so much.

I couldn't leave my children for a week, I would find it really traumatic and I know both kiddos would find it really difficult. I'm also breastfeeding baby DS.

If I were you, I'd take the money I'd have spent on going to Florida and I'd book a weekend stay and expensive dinner at a luxury London hotel like Claridges, The Savoy etc. Actually this is what DH arranged for my 30th, we stayed at Claridges, had dinner there and went to see a West End show. It was honestly amazing and I still talk about it.

It is up to you.

I’d be thinking I may have a right to this, and also thinking I have given up a lot of rights for the kids already cos of “guilt” or “responsibilities”. It’s hard to be wise as a parent and we all know we’ve done things we maybe wouldn’t if we had our time again. It might be ok but I honestly don’t think I’d really enjoy it as much as if i just went in a few years time .
Then what if the baby has special needs… oh dear . Parenting is tough sometimes but always worth it. Good luck .