To think he named his DD after me

[LetMeSpeak]

So a few months ago I had got back contact with an ex from years back in my high school days. The man is even more of a bigger knob now than back then. He was bragging how “successful” he was, talking about his big finance job etc. Then he proceeded to call me his “first love” and told me that he would constantly check on my on social media for years and that he was “devastated” when he found out I was had gotten married. I then blocked his number and blocked him on the social media he added me on.

Now months later I get a request from him on Facebook and I accepted (like an idiot 🙄). I then see on a recent post he has a picture of his new baby daughter who has the same name as me! Spelt exact same way ( it’s a unique name in this country and way of spelling it is also unique). What in the Adam Levine is actually wrong with this man? Why would he do this and why would he not ask for my permission?

It’s not a coincidence as he told me his children were named after his friends. His daughters middle name is his sisters first name as well.

Im just in shock. His girlfriend is rather young as well poor thing. Aibu? or do I need to just calm down.

Stop wasting energy on this. You don't own your name. Block him and move on.

@LetMeSpeak certainly weird but I don’t understand why after all this time you still let him live in your head rent free. If I were you DH I would be gutted and feel second best

He doesn’t understand my frustration which is why I’m venting on here

But why are you frustrated?

First love always takes up some space in your head though. Even it's bad, there's just something about the FIRST love, especially if you add first sex into the mix.

But he's (apparently) moved on OP and it's not kind and sort of a bit narcissistic to announce you're peeking on your exes life still and expect your DH to be supportive. That's very coercive behaviour and a bit emotionally manipulative.

Perhaps though, you're both playing a game and sending signals to each other that are just between you too? Or maybe he's playing the game... so, by naming his daughter after you he's sending this 'secret signal', that only you will know, and you feel compelled and manipulated to respond? Is that what you're trying to say?

In that case I can 100% understand why you would be upset and understand your frustration.

So you got back in touch and then you blocked him. And then you accepted a friend request and looked at his posts. Admit it OP, you love the drama.

And there is no actual drama. It’s all in your head. Unfriend him and move on. His babies name and his girlfriends age are none of your business.

Yeh, he doesn't have to ask your permission but it's weird. Perhaps a bit creepy. Assuming his friends will realise the connection, it sounds like he hasn't let good obsession over you go. That name is a constant reminder to him if his obsession with you too.... For decades.

Does his obsession with you cause you concern? That would be my worry

@DysonSpheres well my first love and sexual partner holds a place in my memory but I don’t reminisce or think of them anymore, it is exactly that a memory and part of my past

So, it’s not just you he has named his kids after, but plenty of other friends and family too.

You say you got in touch with him the first time, then blocked him but then accepted a subsequent friends request. He had been honest about holding a torch for you as his first love.

If you hadn’t accepted contact for the second time you wouldn’t even know this.

He didn’t need your permission.

So.......??

Hahahaha hahah classic mumsnet

How do you know this. I think you are jumping to so many conclusions here. I think you need to just forget about it and get on with your life !

I agree OP it's weird. He apparently thought so much of your relationship etc etc, it's weird he'd want that as a permanent reminder / association with his daughter. A friend yes. An ex, weird.