To think that it’s an ongoing challenge to look groomed and smart as an overweight woman?

[NellesVilla]

Evening all,

Just musing the following:

I’m overweight, extremely overweight and don’t wear it well (IMO). I’m technically almost obese but others say I don’t look quite this bad (thanks?!). I find it so hard to look groomed and smart. I’m an extremely fastidious, clean person and dress in neutrals with simple, classic make up and nicely-styled hair but it is such an effort to keep up. My hair messes itself up within minutes (and needs to be brushed all the time- v fine, long and flyaway); I get hot sweaty and red-faced v easily and I don’t ever look nice or nicely put together.

Are you overweight or do you know anyone overweight who looks classy and stylish, and if so, how is it done? My hair looks like it’s been dragged through a bush backwards (think Hermione in Harry Potter).

This is not to offend anyone who is also overweight (we know we are), and I am working on my weight (but anyone with an ED will know it’s a long process for some). Is it possible to look good overweight- I don’t think so, personally, but any ideas on how to look/feel a bit better while I’m on my health journey would be helpful, thanks.

I think jewellery makes it for me.

I'm 5 foot, a size 20 (I know I know), and I wear crop tops, and high waisted, wide leg flowy trousers or skirts to make my proportions look normal.

If I throw on some earrings and a necklace I can go from looking like an oompa loompa to fairly decent.

Also, always making sure my hair has a parting. I used to just let it fall naturally, but it goes every where so now we have a parting and use pretty hair clips, or a thin headband.

@FoofOfTheWalkingDead

The sizing is massive. Almost everything is hugely oversized. Literally! I’m a 16 and have frequently had to buy a S or an M.

Also some of them go up to an 18. I don’t think wearing tailored stuff is always the answer either. It makes you look too formal. I’m an hourglass and hate fitted stuff.

l would say make sure most stuff you wear ( especially tops) are simple and slightly oversized. This makes you look smaller imo.. And avoid polyester nylon prints or fussy necklines etc.

I’ve just looked on Cos, and it’s pretty crap atm. Usually it’s much better.

This is the sort of thing l mean. Wear with wide leg trousers and head held high.

Because they use really good fabrics, the drape on them is amazing. And they drape flatteringly rather than highlight the limos. Fabric is the key l think!

Or this

With photo! It’s the weight of the fabric that’s important.

I'm not overweight but I struggle to look groomed. I think somecpeople are good at it and some aren't. Not surecit has anything to do with weight, more attention to detail and priorities.

I think this style makes people look bigger than they are?

I think that’s a myth. If it fits loosley l think it flatters more. All the overweight people who l know go for simple well made lose shapes.

Tailoring is too formal and fussy for lots of situations, and is also a ‘cliche’

I didn't mean fashion advice, i meant that's my opinion 😂

I don't know why something with a bit of shape would be a cliche

realising that it's all just opinion is helpful. My sister would put me in completely different colours than I like, for example. She had her colours done by one of those consultants and I'm not keen on the colours they suggest for her (obviously I'd never say that).

So nice to hear I’m not alone in my way of thinking but sad that others struggle 💐 I agree that retro styles can work really well with a fuller figure and will have to venture out of M & S a bit more for clothing!

Does anyone have any ideas for smartish shoes that are quite flat, please? I have bad heels and also basically can’t really walk in heels so looking for nice ‘chunky’ flats if that makes sense?

PS. A couple of posters thought I was a size 14- in my dreams! After putting on weight I became a 14 and gave up at this point. I’d love to be a 14 or 12-14 again. Currently a good 18, often a 20 on the bottom as huge thighs. 5 ft 8 tall.

Like these?Camper loafers

These are rather beautiful shoes. They ship to U.K.

memery.co.uk/?currency=GBP

That is a shapeless sack.

April glad it's not just me thinking that.

to wear that with wide trousers..l mean, it's a look, but not one that's flattering to anyone who isn't pencil thin.

it also looks like it's been photoshopped on to the model.

I'm overweight and got a shein haul of lovely dresses that I wear all the time I don't keep things for best I wear my best everyday and always get comments that I look nice.

I've given up on clothes shopping. Luckily I'm 5 ft 9 but a size 18 with huge boobs. Nothing hangs right on top, pretty much everything looks matronly and tent like as my boobs stick out so far everything hangs off like a giant A Line! I stick to v necks and empire lines that aren't too high necked for smart but detest shopping

@Notjustanymum

im loving the image I’m getting of your style.

There is one simple thing anyone can do to improve their appearance - improve your posture. Standing correctly makes everyone look so much better.

And my posture is good.

it's being fat that's my problem, plus part my hair. I am thinking about chemical treatments for that. I felt like I could get away with frizz before but now it is adding to the general impression of being an unkempt mess.

I know Oprah Winfrey has endless money and would employ people to shop for her, but she’s a woman who’s weight has ‘fluctuated’, (for some reason I hate that word), a lot. Never thin though. She does have a waist though which is a plus. Even when younger I never had a waist. And I have very broad shoulders and back. So Oprah’s dress for her shape style, is not going to work for me.

But it has struck me that she often wears one colour in her clothing - tops the same colour as bottoms. I think that also helps to keep her looking very put together.

@Redfrangipani thank you! I just like styling it out!

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow

If into vintage style shoes these shoes are lovely. I did really like the Edwardian Walking Boots - I had a very similar pair I bought years ago. I loved them.

Thanks OP for starting this thread. So far, already I’ve learned more here than I have on any style site.It’s great getting all the different views and also solutions people have found.

I am massively overweight with long hair. I find tying hair in a ponytail or a bun keeps it looking tidier than having it hanging loose. I keep the loose and curled look for when we go out in evenings.

There's a mum on my school run. She's obese (just looking at her I reckon she's at least a size 20 +) but omg, she looks amazing everyday! She always wears gorgeous outfits. She's absolutely gorgeous too and her hair, even when it's obvious she's not done much with it that day, always looks great. She looks effortlessly well put together. She is so stylish and always wears colours and shapes that suit her so well! She never looks frumpy.
I always look out for her on the school run to see what outfit she's wearing that day.
I should say something to her one day but worried that would make me look stalkerish as I have nothing to do with her and her dc are much younger than mine.
I don't think size should be a barrier.
Embrace your natural curves. Wear clothes that fit you well. Not baggy or too tight. Wear bright colours. Stand out, be bold, wear a bit of make up, show off your best features.
Your hair sounds similar to mine. I have recently had a haircut and bought a cheap (but very good) pair of straighteners from argos. Game changer!