What do you NOT miss about your EXH??

[FloraFloraa]

I need to some light-hearted chat.
My divorce is almost finalised... yes, I've had moments of sadness and "I hope I am doing the right thing" but I know I am 100%.
My STBXH isn't a bad guy, we just fell out of love and grew apart.
However, I've started thinking of all the things I am looking forward too... such as CHRISTMAS!! I am excited knowing that I can have a leisurely morning and not drive to 3 different houses in our neighbouring city to visit STBXH family.
I am also looking forward to not listening to his shit loud music in the house too...

I probably sound mean but tell me what DON'T you miss about your EXH??

xx

Ooh my fave subject!

i don’t miss the moaning, negativity, being bollocked for no reason, the constant grabbing at me, the not having to put him on a pedestal & have ‘we’ll done, you’re amazing’ parties for painting a wall etc, the pushing of his conspiracy theorist views on me, the bollocking of my DD for just falling/spilling Tomato Keychup, the telling me to get rid of my pets, being ungrateful about our ‘rabbit hutch’ house (that I paid for!) our grass in the garden wasn’t good enough etc etc!

I too can now enjoy Christmas & I LOVE my calm house without the constant rules!

Enjoy!

I do not miss the way my ex used to stand bollock naked, back hunched to accentuate the pot belly, one leg up on a surface, scrolling through his smartphone with one hand, rubbing dead skin off his chest (which he'd then eat) with the other.

I only had to bear witness to this hot mess twice. The second time, I dumped him the next day, citing his body habits as my reason.

Thankfully we weren't married.

Ewwww love this.
His self entitledness.
Example, I owned the house, he did a bit of shopping in order to live there (I know I know).
He wouldn't let me dry my hair or do my makeup in my own bedroom in the morning because it woke him up. He didn't even have a fucking job half the time 😅
Can't believe I used to creep around that bastard.

Yes!! My STBXH used to do this too... always went in a huff if I didnt thank him for hoovering the stairs. He would say it was justified as we didnt always do it... but its still bloody housework!!

Ewww to the eating dead skin... my STBXH is a good looking guy, I am just not attracted to him anymore... but I'd hate the way he'd, just before a shower, walk about naked... seeing his manhood flopping made me feel sick... he used to walk up in the mornings, get out of bed, stretch and scratch his back and tummy so loud it would wake me up, yuck!!

Being blamed for everything that went wrong, for e.g. he kicked a glass that was on the floor, smashing it, glass everywhere. It was my fault as the glass was on the floor. "if I had picked it up he wouldn't have kicked it" he was the one that originally put the glass on the floor. 🤣

Omg, Dimples, he sounds crazy!!

Where do I start!! His stupid cow chewing the cud expression when eating and refusing to speak to anyone for the entirety of the meal - especially embarrassing when we had friends and relatives over. You are surely allowed to talk during the meal?
Selfishness.
Constant sex pestering.
Refusing to help out in the house or garden.
Always losing his job because of his immature behaviour.
The way he replied to "it will be alright" to every single question about finances etc. It won't be alright, you have to work hard to make sure it will be alright not assume everything will be alright on its own.
Refusal to make a will.
Refusal to take out a pension.
Never buying me a birthday or xmas gift.
Moaning about everything when he had a life of ease thanks to me and my hard work.
His absurd belief in conspiracy theories.
His drinking.
Watching porn, he knew I hate porn.
His erectile dysfunction nearly every time despite pestering me for sex.
The way he could never put a tent up straight.
Good bloody riddance.

The lying, the cheating…

My STBXH started chewing like a cow or maybe it started irritating me when it did like everything else..

Thought of another... at restaurants, he would sit engrossed in the menu, like he would read it for about 20 minutes straight, head down, no conversation, he would take ages, I would always be thinking "hurry up and fucking pick!!"

I don’t miss him spending a lot of our money on cocaine, and then lying about it, even though I’d found the empty bag in his jeans pocket, as well as a rolled up £20 note. He turned me into a paranoid loon.

The snoring

The wearing of clothes util they disintegrated.

The deep loud belowey voice.

Spoony fuckery.

The whole jack Russelling thing when I was washing up.

The constant falling asleep on the sofa.

OMG Itsvalentino, that sounds awful :( no doubt telling you it was all in your head and you were crazy!! The scoundrel!!

The really loud over the top yawning
The moodiness - never knowing if I had done something wrong
The lack of affection
The eye rolls when I had a minor ailment
The constant excuses why he couldn't spend time with me and the kids
The way work was more important than us
His family
The way he never blew his nose and left the snot to just run

Sittingonthefence83, yes to the moodiness, mine would be soooo moody. I always remember asking him, "are we okay", "are you annoyed at me?", as he would come home from work and literally just not speak to me. I get he had a stressful job and he said he wanted quiet when he came home but I just thought that was unfair, particularly as it was most days!!

The constant digs about my weight.
The "jokes" that weren't jokes they were thinly veiled insults.
The way he would spit his toothpaste out with a horrible throat clearing noise.
His horrible teenage daughter.
The way he was so jealous of my relationship with my daughter.
What a dick.

Financial fecklessness and treating me like a cash cow
The dread in the pit of my stomach when I heard him open the first can of beer of the evening (first of usually five or six)
Constantly being told the house was messy even though I did 80% of the domestic work
Resigning jobs all the time without consulting me and then asking for money to “start his own business”
Endlessly watching fishing programmes or shit action movies at full volume
Refusing to do anything at all at weekends other than drink with his mates and then sleep for most of the next day

About the only thing I do miss is his cooking. It’s the only way our marriage improved my life.

Mine would also do this thing to clear his nose / throat (I dont know, I never really understood it) and he would leave yellow clumps in the sink... disgusting!!

The hangdog expression, the constant woe is me, victim shit. The strops. Spending money like water that we didn't have. Not pulling his weight with the kids. Making everything my fault, including why he's unhappy. His pissy cock. His lack of 'stamina'. Our mismatched sexualities. His family (except his mum. I miss her). His lack of affection.

So happy he's gone.

I don’t miss being let down all the effing time, doing everything around the kids and the house while he is having a nap, being pestered for sex without any romance, criticism of my needs or sociable personality as he ‘doesn’t need friends’, hearing ‘on my next day off’ every time I suggest something and then never happening, shouting at the kids, seeing him spending hours and hours listening to news and conspiracy on YouTube, having to ask him for money, waiting for him as he needs a cig, spends loads of time on the toilet, going on at me about spending MY money on things that OUR kids need, having to ask him for money to contribute to our mortgage and bills, having people ask where is my imaginary husband every weekend as he was never there, listening about his work and who have sex with whom, not being able to plan things as some things are supposed to be done as a family but he never wanted to do anything or again said my next day off, not laughing, being with someone who doesn’t laugh or has a very different sense of humour, being miserable, eating a lot of chocolate to give myself some enjoyment, putting on weight, drinking a lot of wine when I was with him to try and get a feeling, putting more weight on, looking at him making dodgy or just stupid decisions that affect our lives or breaking things but not taking responsibility… gosh the list could go on!!!

Oh gosh, yes you’ve just reminded me about the clearing his throat noises, so happy they are gone!!!

Sova: being pestered for sex without any romance - I can totally relate, mine would do this all the time.

Snoring
Being very smelly - and telling me to fuck off if I mentioned it
The long speeches after Christmas lunch with his family explaining world events to everyone
The selfishness - never offering to make me a cuppa when he was making himself one
Never remembering to wish me good luck for a high stress important day
Crossing the road or walking ahead through crowds without me and our little kids
Waiting till the last moment to finish work before coming to spend time with the kids
Keeping the money from his parents for a special meal that I paid for
Lying
Cheating
Crap sex

CRAP SEX!! YES!!

@Sova

Oh God and this. Endlessly waiting for him to finish cigarettes. We couldn’t leave the house or do anything until he had had about three fags in the garden, back to back.

Hell would freeze over before I would shack up with another smoker.

I don't miss him deciding he needed to have a poo just before we are due to leave the house. And then always made us late coz for some unknown reason he'd be in there for at least half an hour. He couldn't be on time for anything! I used to say he will be late for his own funeral