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Original poster

Furious at another Mum

172 replies

Pastryapronsucks · 01/10/2022 21:59

What are your thoughts about this? My 13 nearly 14 YO DD went to
the park with 4 friends this afternoon. She text to say they popping in to 1 of their home let's call him Dave (she hasn't been before). 40 mins later she was home and absolutely fine.

About an hour later she ran out to me in the garden in floods of tear. Daves mum had called her on his phone demanding my number and our address, she threatened if DD didn't give it to her she would call the school on Monday. She accused DD of taking gin. DD absolutely denied it and said she was only in the kitchen a few minutes nor did she think any of the others would.

I had a missed call from the woman so rang her back she said she was calling me because she was 'concerned and thought I should be aware of this worrying behaviour'. Apparently 500ml of gin had gone (that's nearly a pint FFS). I told her I had spoken to DD and has flatly denied it. The woman then said DD had slurred when she spoke to her on the phone (DD has a lisp). She rode her bike home and was talking perfectly lucidly. I am 100% certain she hasn't drunk anything.

The woman accused me of ignoring this behaviour and I am storing up trouble for myself in the future and will regret it! At this point I was quite angry and asked what grounds she had to acuse my DD and suggested that she allows young people in her home she should take more responsibility, or perhaps look to her own son. I told her I am extremely unhappy that she approached and accused my daughter and has caused her so much distress, poor thing was absolutely distraught and thinks she is going to get into trouble at school.

The woman said things have been disappearing in her home. I reminded her DD had never been round before and will certainly never be visiting again. The woman said she clearly wasnt getting anywhere so would be calling the school on Monday.

I think she has been trying to get the numbers of the other children and DD has been told never to give information to any one again but to come directly to us. I am realybshaken up by the whole thing. This isn't normal is it?

OP posts:
Creameggs223 · 02/10/2022 22:12

It's nothing todo with the school, the most they could do is call to let you know incase your unaware but that's all.

CJsGoldfish · 02/10/2022 22:18

You need to report to the school that DD is being harrased threatened by another parent who is abelist (commenting on her speech issues) and that this women is to have absoloutly NOTHING to do with your child
This made me laugh because I thought it was having a laff at the ridiculousness on this thread but then I wondered if it was actually meant to be real 😂
Harassed? Threatened? Get a grip FFS 🙄

CelestiaNoctis · 02/10/2022 22:29

OK for starters, why is her alcohol not locked up or hidden from teenagers? And why is she allowing teenagers over that she doesn't know and allowing them to be out of her sight? Sounds like she's the irresponsible one and is projecting. I'd block her and tell your daughter not to go round there again, clearly mental and not responsible.

jamdonut · 03/10/2022 06:16

I think if school get wind of it, it WILL become a their problem… it will become a safeguarding problem and will end up being investigated. At the very least, it will be noted down somewhere.
personally, I would want to make a pre-emotive call or email to school that there may be talk amongst the kids, and why your daughter may be out of sorts.
For a start, she ( the mother) shouldn’t be contacting other children directly.
I think you have done everything right so far.

Katekeeprunning · 03/10/2022 09:48

I would agree with the majority of others, don't engage with her and I wouldn't involve school.

I am sure you are absolutely livid, I would be too. This will blow over but it's rotten while it's happening.

eastegg · 03/10/2022 09:51

Interesting that on a thread about making assumptions and wild accusations, so many people have jumped in straightaway to say the mum is obviously a raging alcoholic.

35965a · 03/10/2022 09:54

Interesting that on a thread about making assumptions and wild accusations, so many people have jumped in straightaway to say the mum is obviously a raging alcoholic.

Usually the most likely explanation is correct though. Either the son is stealing booze or the Mum is an alcoholic.

eastegg · 03/10/2022 09:57

wherearebeefandonioncrisps · 02/10/2022 20:30

I'd get in touch with the school.
If only to give them the heads up about this parent and her issue with alcohol and her own child.
Tell them what happened, as you have her.

A heads up about what, sorry? Speculating to the school about another parent’s imaginary alcohol problem?

Don’t do that OP.

mam0918 · 03/10/2022 10:00

bluesapphire48 · 02/10/2022 21:40

This woman is making a false accusation, and it sounds like SHE has an alcohol problem. As far as I'm concerned, anybody who keeps hard liquor in the house has an alcohol problem.

If you didn't notice any suspicious behavior on your daughter's part, then clearly it is a false accusation. If you can, why don't you accompany your daughter to school on Monday, and ask to speak to the principal? This woman should not be allowed on campus to harass and intimidate your daughter. She really has no business involving the school in her drinking problem, but if she interferes with your daughter's education, then the school needs to be aware of the problem. From YOUR point of view.

What an utterly ridiculous statement.

I have a fuck tonne of hard liquor in the house exactly because I DON'T drink it often (honestly I have a cocktail from a bottle of alcohol maybe once or twice a year), I also have a tonne of champaign and wine which I have never drank and can't even stand.

They are common gifts from people.

mam0918 · 03/10/2022 10:04

CJsGoldfish · 02/10/2022 22:18

You need to report to the school that DD is being harrased threatened by another parent who is abelist (commenting on her speech issues) and that this women is to have absoloutly NOTHING to do with your child
This made me laugh because I thought it was having a laff at the ridiculousness on this thread but then I wondered if it was actually meant to be real 😂
Harassed? Threatened? Get a grip FFS 🙄

An adult phoning a child they dont know yelling and demanding infomation on other kids and threatening to report her to people in charge of her saying she will get in trouble + commenting inappropriately on her disability.

What the fuck would you call it?

If someone did this to an adult the police very much DO take it as harrasment and threats so of course it is when someone does it to a CHILD.

CJsGoldfish · 03/10/2022 11:53

An adult phoning a child they dont know yelling and demanding infomation on other kids and threatening to report her to people in charge of her saying she will get in trouble + commenting inappropriately on her disability
Oh, please. Stop being such a drama llama 🙄
As per the OP's post, the mother called to get the OPs phone number. The 'yelling and demanding' is a nice embellishment, sure, but if she suspects the teens were up to no good, why shouldn't she try and contact the parents? 🤷‍♀️

What the fuck would you call it?
Not harassment, that's for sure 😂

If someone did this to an adult the police very much DO take it as harrasment and threats so of course it is when someone does it to a CHILD
Yeah, doubt it. No matter how you try and paint it, it isn't 'harassment and threats'

Maryminx · 03/10/2022 13:05

Contact the school first! Tell them I have had a very worrying call from the mum.
? Safeguarding issues re Dave the son.
reassure your daughter, but she should not go to Dave’s home again.

VoiceOfCommonSense · 03/10/2022 15:15

Pastryapronsucks · 01/10/2022 22:15

That's exactly what I thought. I think she was implying she would tell the school what bad parent I am for not believing my daughter drank a pint of her gin!

Show quote history

I would have just told the woman it’s ridiculous, your daughter only drinks vodka not gin and hung up 🤣🤣

bemusedmoose · 03/10/2022 15:28

Sounds like her precious Dave might be the one storing up trouble!! Some parents just cant take on board it's their child acting up and blame it on the guests.

dad11122 · 05/10/2022 08:30

Pastryapronsucks · 01/10/2022 21:59

What are your thoughts about this? My 13 nearly 14 YO DD went to
the park with 4 friends this afternoon. She text to say they popping in to 1 of their home let's call him Dave (she hasn't been before). 40 mins later she was home and absolutely fine.

About an hour later she ran out to me in the garden in floods of tear. Daves mum had called her on his phone demanding my number and our address, she threatened if DD didn't give it to her she would call the school on Monday. She accused DD of taking gin. DD absolutely denied it and said she was only in the kitchen a few minutes nor did she think any of the others would.

I had a missed call from the woman so rang her back she said she was calling me because she was 'concerned and thought I should be aware of this worrying behaviour'. Apparently 500ml of gin had gone (that's nearly a pint FFS). I told her I had spoken to DD and has flatly denied it. The woman then said DD had slurred when she spoke to her on the phone (DD has a lisp). She rode her bike home and was talking perfectly lucidly. I am 100% certain she hasn't drunk anything.

The woman accused me of ignoring this behaviour and I am storing up trouble for myself in the future and will regret it! At this point I was quite angry and asked what grounds she had to acuse my DD and suggested that she allows young people in her home she should take more responsibility, or perhaps look to her own son. I told her I am extremely unhappy that she approached and accused my daughter and has caused her so much distress, poor thing was absolutely distraught and thinks she is going to get into trouble at school.

The woman said things have been disappearing in her home. I reminded her DD had never been round before and will certainly never be visiting again. The woman said she clearly wasnt getting anywhere so would be calling the school on Monday.

I think she has been trying to get the numbers of the other children and DD has been told never to give information to any one again but to come directly to us. I am realybshaken up by the whole thing. This isn't normal is it?

Why would you contact school about something that happened outside school?
Don't people consider that schools are already doing their own job and that of social services and have no capacity to deal with this sort of rubbish? If someone has been a victim of a theft then surely it should be reported to the police.

Threelittlelambs · 05/10/2022 21:29

OP wasn’t going to call school. Mad mother accused her DD of stealing and DD was worried Mad mother would report her to school. Hence posters saying if it made DD feel better to let school know her side before MM rang them.

It’s not difficult to follow.

quietnightmare · 05/10/2022 22:00

I really wouldn't worry. They probably all done it, they are teenagers and won't be stealing from crazy mother again. Lock up your alcohol op your cupboards next.

Dibbydoos · 09/10/2022 13:50

The basis of ger accusation I'd your daughters lisp?! She sounds like dillusional to me.

Hopefully the school will say it was out of hours so nothing to do with them.

And it's way more likely her own kids than visitors anyways....!

Hope you and DD are OK now x

mustgetoffmn · 13/01/2023 19:59

Woman has alcohol problem and was drunk when she did all this. Not always obvious if you are “high operating “ alcoholic. Also her agitation at missing drink and conviction that it had kept happening before a sign. Memory lapses.

ShinyMe · 13/01/2023 20:02

mustgetoffmn · 13/01/2023 19:59

Woman has alcohol problem and was drunk when she did all this. Not always obvious if you are “high operating “ alcoholic. Also her agitation at missing drink and conviction that it had kept happening before a sign. Memory lapses.

This is MONTHS old, I'm guessing it's been sorted out.

mustgetoffmn · 13/01/2023 20:05

eastegg · 03/10/2022 09:51

Interesting that on a thread about making assumptions and wild accusations, so many people have jumped in straightaway to say the mum is obviously a raging alcoholic.

Takes one to know one that’s why. Meaning this really is recognisable alcoholic behaviour to those who have been there. She might not be but it’s not unfair to point out the possibility especially given she started it!

mustgetoffmn · 13/01/2023 20:19

ShinyMe · 13/01/2023 20:02

This is MONTHS old, I'm guessing it's been sorted out.

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A lot of posts are months old not sure why MN doesn’t take them down instead of leaving them to be continually referred to. Another reason for me to finally operate my user name.

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