Would you leave baby asleep in car ?

[engalaaand]

Whilst you took older child to nursery (takes 3 minutes) ? Car is right outside and locked..

Doesn’t mean they “won’t be interested” their life was made hell and took ages to clear their name. When it could have all been avoided. Their children was placed on child protection register so yes it might have been “over turned” after months of hell but it’s incorrect to say ss won’t be interested

I don't think it's likely my baby will choke to death in 3 minutes in his car seat.

When it happened while I was driving and he choked, he had to wait much longer than 3 minutes before I could pull over safely.

He's asleep upstairs right now, so you're telling everyone I need to be constantly worried he's going to choke to death? NO that's ridiculous and it's a way to give a new mother extreme anxiety. Babies can be left for a few minutes to sleep in peace, in a bed, or in a car seat- without you worrying they'll choke to death.

In the case of a cot, they can be left, god forbid, for their nap time or at night time too. Without you constantly worried they'll choke to death. In their car seat, they should not sleep in it for an extended period of time ( especially not newborns, where 30 minutes is the maximum ). However, it's unlikely that my baby will choke to death in 3 minutes in the car seat. My point is, he may be in the car seat for more than 3 minutes at other times where I can't get to him.

Glad to see that you're reconsidering OP. Maybe purchase a travel system with a car seat so that you can transfer baby asleep from the car and back again without waking them up?

It also might be worth checking what the actual law is on this subject. I assumed it was illegal and a matter for police/ss but maybe it is a grey area as so many parents leave children in the car at petrol stations? Personally I have always managed to pay at pump but I only drive around my hometown.

Risk of car being stolen - yes, a very tiny risk, but if that happened, its overwhelmingly likely that they baby will be dumped outside in its car seat somewhere...

Oh well that's fine then! 🤣🤯

Risk of someone kidnapping. It's only a small minority of paedophiles that kidnap thankfully...

Again... Why would you ever take that risk? Even if it's a small risk, the impact is devastatingly enormous. I'd wake my baby a thousand times over rather than put them at the smallest risk of something like that happening.

I personally wouldn’t, and never have for either my 7yr old or our now 7mth old. I’m that person that takes them out when paying for petrol etc every time though. I’d be so conscious of either something happening to them, or as above something happening to me and as a result no one knowing my young baby was left alone in a car on a quiet road. For few seconds inconvenience I’ve never wanted to take the risk…but each to their own.

Its also 8 years old.

So no, I don't think ss have the resources to be interested in a complete non event.

1 article from 8 years ago where the verdict was overturned doesn't disprove that

Also, I'm sure there was something to do with the road worthiness of the car.

It wasn't just the toddler being unsupervised in the car

Choking starves the brain of oxygen. Brain damage occurs within four to six minutes. Are you absolutely sure you've got your timings right?

Guidance is that you should only be putting baby in a cot in a separate room after six months old, and then this is precisely what monitors are for.

@takealettermsjones so you were watching your baby every 4 minutes when asleep ? On baby cam etc ? I don't get this. I put my baby down in peace for a couple of hours. Baby camera on. Has a motion sensor too. So surely I would know if something was wrong ?

Somehow they both seem fine and I've had lots of vomiting / spit up in their cot with no issues.

There are no circumstances in which I would have left my baby or my now toddler in a car and walked away from it out of eyesight. If I was parked outside the entrance to the nursery with direct line of sight and possibly touching distance to car I'd consider it. I also won't leave her to go into a shop and pay for petrol under any circumstances. She comes with or I pay at the pump.

I would be worried about someone taking her, the car being hit by another car, the keys getting lost whilst dropping off toddler, my child waking up and being terrified at being alone, something malfunctioning on the car or the hand break not being properly engaged, etc. any number of highly unlikely scenarios that I know are almost never going to happen but don't see the point in taking a risk over just in case we are the unlucky ones.

FWIW I know someone who did this and the school reported it to SS as a safeguarding concern.

Yes of course, but you don't have a monitor on when leaving them to go and do nursery drop off? Or maybe you do 🤷🏻‍♀️😆

In a nursery car park, yes, if I knew I was only going to be max 5 minutes and lots of other parents around.
Public street right outside if no nursery car park, no.

Because you'll drive yourself crazy trying to mitigate against every theoretical risk. Your baby has more risk of being hurt by lightening than stolen from a locked car by a paedophile. Should people keep their babies inside in case of a sudden storm, freak hailstones, cars mounting the pavement etc? A lion escaping from the local zoo?

It's not a real risk.
It's paranoia.

No I wouldn’t not in the scenario you describe.
doesn’t the car seat lift out easily as it’s an infant one or are you belt fitting it?

No, only if I could see the car. Probably be ok but I would be super stressed the whole time

@takealettermsjones

Choking can be silent.

Do you never sleep?

The guidance is that until six months but preferably a year baby sleeps in the same room as you, including naps. So my daughter always napped and slept in a room I was in at all times under six months and I checked her regularly. I was more relaxed after six months and would put her down for naps and step out briefly but never when she was under six months.

I saw a woman leave her newborn in the car while she went into a local spar. I was gob smacked. For me the worry is that something happens to me, no necessarily the car. Say I collapse/ heart attack / anything. I get rushed into and ambulance. No one would know the baby had been left.

Don't you see that they are at more risk with your taking them across a forecourt with traffic etc, than in a parked car in your sight?

It's not you being careful.
It's the opposite.

@zaffa fair enough, you do you.

I personally let him nap alone sometimes. Same with the older one. No issues. I have too much to do to be always with them watching them every second.

You simply stated ss wouldn’t be interested, you have no way of knowing that, just because she doesn’t get charged doesn’t mean it can lead to months of hell having your life investigated, assessments on your other children, possible CIN/CP plan, who wants that? No passer by will know she’s only been gone for 3 mins if someone walking by sees a baby alone in a car and reports it ss would have a duty to investigate that, which can lead to months of stress being investigated which can easily be avoided.

Well obviously I do, because otherwise I would die, so that's not a reasonable adjustment I can make 🙄😆

Because you'll drive yourself crazy trying to mitigate against every theoretical risk. Your baby has more risk of being hurt by lightening than stolen from a locked car by a paedophile. Should people keep their babies inside in case of a sudden storm, freak hailstones, cars mounting the pavement etc? A lion escaping from the local zoo?

It's not a real risk.
It's paranoia.

I see what you're saying, but I disagree based on how easy it is to mitigate the risk of what I'm talking about. All your examples above, I can't actually do anything about - besides, as you say, staying in a weatherproof bunker or something, which would in itself cause immeasurable damage to my child and myself. However, in OP's example, I can do something very simple and not damaging at all to mitigate any risk - I can take baby with me.

I did this, always, as soon as they were out of a non-portable car seat. A lot higher risk that you get run over with them crossing to the petrol station shop/nursery/etc than anything else happening. When I was little people used to park big prams outside shops with the baby in to go in as you'd never get those Silver Cross jobs into a shop. There are no more baby kidnappers around now than there were in the 1970s.

Yeah but you are way too worried about baby choking in their beds etc I think.

Survivor bias.

This is exactly the reason SS would be interested - because just like with the car, you are showing lack of appropriate and sound judgement.