Imagine getting the hardest job of your life aged 73 and having to do it till you die.

[MrsMarlowe]

Just watching the ‘highlights’ of the day (if you can call it that).
I’m not a monarchist. But I really feel for Charles. He looked much older than I’ve seen him look before, so sad (naturally) and utterly exhausted.

Most people are retired aged 73. Imagine being that age and only just getting started on your hardest job. And not being able to decline the role (without massive fallout) and having to do it till you die.

And think about what motivates the rest of us in our jobs: the prospect of increased reward, status, respect, and finally more downtime as we reach retirement to enjoy the fruits of our labour.
Obviously he has all the wealth, status etc already … but then where can any motivation come from? He just doesn’t have a choice - it’s duty. Talk about a gilded cage.

I felt quite emotional watching Charles, William and George in the wake of the coffin. Knowing that it will come to them one day. Knowing their destiny is already set, whether they like it or not. What a life, to be royal.

Exactly, they don't have to fall out with people or put up with work place annoyances like the rest of us do. Their word is final, they're surrounded by people whose sole aim is to make life easy for them. We shouldn't call what they do "work", because it isn't.

Yes they've got to be nice to people, but equally it's easy to be polite when most people are subservient to you and frightened of stepping out of line or "disrespecting you". And Charles wasn't exactly polite in the pen fiasco, I'm sure the royal family are very gogood having sharp words when they need to, but because they are the royal family a Sharp word is all they need

Also there’s the fact that almost all of us need to be nice to people at work, and hardly any of us experience that subservience and bowing and scraping. I have to be nice when I’m serving customers in my NMW job, even when they scream and shout because they’ve brought an item back too late to return. I have to be nice in my other agency zero hour job when parents complain that their child has lost their (unlabelled) nursery jumper and I can’t distinguish it from the other 40 unlabelled nursery jumpers.

Being nice is part of working - hardly any of us are allowed to be rude while working, and that’s with people being rude to us, and all the pressures of real life. So it’s not really heartbreaking that the royals sometimes have to be nice to people.

Indeed. Being kind, I think perhaps some of our more royalist minded friends are still insensible with grief.

The queen didn't have to "work" till the end. She chose to because I suppose she needed to have some kind of purpose to her day. She wasn't "working" right till the end, she was functioning. Nothing required much effort. She was surrounded by hundreds of servants.

The 'wow, look at the Queen, selflessly working until the end, what a leader, how hard done by' rhetoric is the dominant one I've seen spread around. We're supposed to buy that a ninety odd year old woman is 'working' in any meaningful way and admire her for that. It's nauseating.

As I spent most of yesterday doing my hobby I did think how awful it would be to not have time to just shut myself away to do it, but to be largely unable to get away from my 'job'. For all those saying how privileged they are, I genuinely wouldn't want their lives for all the money in China, would you?

This idea that the Queen had no time to herself is utterly wrong, you realise?

For instance, she spent around 3-4 months a year on holiday in Balmoral doing whatever the hell she wanted.

In contrast, I get 25 paid holidays a year + PH, so yeah, I'd swap for that.

Why on earth do you think one of the most privileged, wealthy and powerful women in the country doesn't have the ability to shut herself away and have time to herself? They have as much free time as they want and endless resources to enjoy it. Some of this is very ridiculous to read, honestly.

I wouldn't want their lives because the monarchy is a ridiculously anachronistic, outdated concept that exemplifies the worst of us, nepotism and being born into a role you've done nothing to earn, I find the entire thing nauseating. So no, I wouldn't want to be a part of that morally. But their lifestyle minus the whole monarchy side? Who wouldn't? Do you know how many people would kill to know that whatever they do they are set financially for the rest of their lives, along with the lives of their kids and grandkids, have access to the best medical care, never have to worry about money, have people to do their dirty work? I simply can't believe that you could look at that life and sneer at it, unless you're already extremely wealthy and privileged and so already have the benefits without the 'being a royal' side.

It genuinely baffles me that people can't use an ounce of critical thought when it comes to the monarchy.

*Not as hard as most parents who worry if their kids will ever be able to get a job, mortgage etc. Also our kids can't ever be king so that kind of equals it out. (There's the injustice.)

Kate's worries about her kids are nothing compared to the rest of us. They live lives of extreme wealth and privilege. Is it so terrible there might be an odd little glitch in their lives.*

Charles has had 73 years of pottering around, while lecturing the rest of us on climate change ( and now William has begun), and simultaneously flying everywhere by helicopter and private jet, with 7 houses, 150 staff, god knows how many cars..... He has had years for hobbies. Just like Edward now has all the time in the world for woodworking

I sometimes wonder how Kate feels knowing George has to serve that life, never being free enough able to do what he might want - be a lawyer, train driver, gardener, whatever. I would find it hard knowing my child had no choice.

He does have a choice. He can abdicate.

Pretty much everyone who thinks I am unreasonable points to either Charles’ wealth or how easy the job of a monarch is, as though those two things mean he is having a wonderful life?

It’s surely not a huge stretch to imagine that working hard at something important to you and feeling self-sufficient and free could bring more happiness and fulfilment than being idle and having servants?

That having millions won’t buy you loyal friends to enjoy it with, or children who will make you proud?

I’m not saying he’s idle, or that he doesn't have friends, just that this material wealth = happiness argument so many of you are making just doesn’t chime with me at all.

His life won't change that much.

Charles has immense personal wealth.

If he doesn't want to be king, he can abdicate and still live a life of absolute luxury with no responsibilities whatsoever.

He has what millions of people absolutely do not, and that is the ability to choose exactly what sort of life he has. If he chooses the life of a king, then why would anyone feel sorry for him?

We have no idea how Charles feels about becoming monarch, because we have never spoken to him. But equally I don't feel sorry for him, and this idea that he's devoting his life to selfless duty is a bit grating. He's not done anything particularly admirable and he's not shown any evidence of suffering. For his 'duty' he has been rewarded with immense wealth, status and luxury. He has servants at his beck and call, he has very few of the stresses the rest of the country suffer. He has been able to give his children an incredible education

If he comes out and says he's got no mates, his children are criminals and he spends every day lying in bed crying then I might feel some sympathy. But until he does I'm not going to magic up pretend hardships to feel sorry for him

Alternatively,

Imagine spending your whole life working towards being king. Imagine wanting to be king with every fibre of your being and knowing the only way you will be King is for your mother to die.

Personally i think it has all been perfect. Charles has got the crown he wanted all his life. The queen i suspect just wanted to join Phillip as soon as she could.

Once everything calms down (Its been quite a week for Charles) he will settle down and do what he has trained for all his life. When he dies William & Kate will step seamlessly into his place too.

Imagine not being able to marry the person you love, and instead having someone suitable chosen for you.

Imagine never having a choice of what to do with your life, for all people like to say he can abdicate, it would cause a constitutional crisis and dump the burden onto his son and geandson.

Imagine having people hate you simply because of the family you were born into.

Imagine being hounded to your death by photographers, even after you’ve left the so called cushy life.

I could go on and on……

There's also a difference between not being happy and suffering

I would argue suffering is spending years alone in your flat. Suffering is being unable to afford to heat your home, suffering is fearing being able to put food on the table, being unable to provide for your family. Suffering is being ill and being unable to see a doctor because you can't afford it or NHS won't see you. Suffering is being elderly and unable to have appropriate care.

And then day to day stresses, the drudgery of cleaning your home, cooking for unappreciative DC. Paying your bills. Dealing with shitty customer service agents, moving house. Ironing your clothes.

Then at work. You've got a shitty boss who bullies you, you've got a work colleague who is lazy, one who won't listen to you. You've got a customer who's shouted at you, you've been blocked in on your way home. The train is cancelled.

Charles will never have any of these sufferings or days to day stresses, I could write pages on the shitty day to day things he won't ever have to do. So he might not have friends, he might be a bit disappointed in Harry. But by nature of his birth he has bypassed all of the suffering and stress that the rest of us have to deal with. People do what he says at the click of his fingers. There are downsides but I'm not going to feel sympathy because he might want to spend more time gardening

But that’s the whole point! He can’t choose!

Okay- he CAN choose in theory, but it’s not like he can just make a career change like any of us could, there would be massive ramifications. Walking away from a responsibility that huge isn’t exactly easy.

Well yes, I grant you these things are relative. I’m not saying he is the most hard done by person in the UK - of course that would be ridiculous!

Likewise even those of us struggling to deal with their bullying boss and to afford their heating bills can be glad in turn that we’re not in a concentration camp in North Korea.

I was just saying that I felt empathy for him and his heirs as it’s not something I would wish for me or my own family in a million years.

There are many people who really genuinely can't choose. Eg caught in the poverty trap, have children to feed.

He absolutely CAN choose. No massive ramifications. William takes over. Job done. Actually it would be very popular.

Yes, he can choose.

If he wanted to he can walk away from it all. It's not like it would be the first time it's happened.

And because he has that choice, then he deserves no sympathy from anyone.

So you admit yourself that yes he can choose.

The fact is, this is a choice. There is an abdication process that he has the option to use and if he isn't, it's because he would prefer to stay king than not. That's all we know, the rest is complete supposition.

And because he can choose, which even you accept, the title of the thread is inaccurate. He doesn't even have to do it now, much less until he dies. Indeed, given the longevity of that family, it's quite conceivable that any disinclination to abdicate might end up being the bigger problem and have the more negative ramifications.

Imagine being married to a beautiful young woman just out of her teens, who had never been in a relationship, had nothing to compare you to and for some reason was besotted with you...and STILL not being able to make the marriage work.

Imagine carrying on an affair for years while stoutly denying that it was happening and claiming that your wife was mentally unstable for believing that it was.

Imagine being such a miserable git that your current wife (supposedly the love of your life) didn't want to live in the same house as you.

I could go on and on and on and onandonandonandon....

To be fair, you don't have to be royal to do any of these things, just a selfish and inadequate human being.