Whole families going food shopping

[Shiningstarr]

Just came back from food shopping, there were a couple of young families in there, one in particular, the mum was pushing the trolley, her two young children walking near her and the dad was following with a pram and carrying another toddler.

Surely it would be easier for just mum to go and do the food shop, or just dad? Why bring all those children plus pram? I can't think of anything worse. Both mum and dad looked stressed.

😂

How would you know they were bitter and stuck up? Such a mumsnet reply. You do realise this is just a vent thread don’t you? Nobody’s petitioning to change the law on supermarket attendance or anything.

I haven't read the whole thread, but just thought I would add in case anyone else has not! I have terrible social anxiety and sometimes (very rarely) i would ask my husband to take me to the supermarket so i could get out of the house and pick up some bits. It wasn't ideal having to take the children as well but that was the only option, but its ok I don't do it now because it makes me anxious to think people are judging me thanks to posts like this.

It's worse when they all have to go to a and e, not just the parents and kids but the whole extended family. I had to go with a horribly swollen foot,waited 4 hours fair enough,standing up or eventually sitting on the floor,as the whole family took up about a dozen seats. I'm over 70 myself,it was hard...just go home family...I appreciate maybe only 1 of them drove, I myself had to take the bus...a taxi rarely breaks you...sorry had to moan.

Odd thing to be 'baffled' by. Perhaps some family's enjoy each others company and use this as an opportunity to spend time together? Some really strange replies here....

They had a large trolley that was stacked right up to the top, they definitely drove as I then saw them loading up their car in the car park.

I agree. Do internet shopping!! A lifesaver.

The worse thing is the pace they go at and you have to manoeuvre around them I’ve decided it’s down to Co dependency and maybe one parent controlling the other

Wowser, this is just totally ridiculous. We just go together sometimes because we like to. Didn't realise I was having my whole marriage scrutinised to this extent

I definitely prefer to shop alone. However, I can see from this thread that there are plenty of perfectly normal reasons why families go together. And I’m appalled at the nastiness and judgement on this thread! Highlights include:

• oh your poooooor kids if you think shopping is a nice day out;
• only fat/common/loud families do this;
• I’ve decided it’s because one parent is controlling (despite there being loads of alternative, non-toxic reasons on offer);
• OP popping her head over the parapet intermittently to remind us she’s still judging that one family she saw and offering more and more crumbs of evidence that they are Wrong whilst showing she refuses to process any of the counterpoints;
• posters snidely claiming they’ve ‘touched a nerve’ just because people calmly explain precisely why they shop together

Nasty, nasty thread.

I am always vaguely aware of people shopping with children (especially babies because I like babies) but they aren't a problem to me. On the other hand some large family groups are annoying, they are completely oblivious to other people, they block the aisles or line up in front of shelves and get irritated if you try to get between them to grab something. They are a definite type and yes they probably would all go to a and e together because they actually can't function without each other.

I have also observed (and learned to avoid) just after school pick up time when a lot of people like to use the parent and child spaces as they have a child/children with them.

We go shopping as a family of 4, after church whenever my husband does the shopping which is fortnightly. He is also the driver. He doesn't believe in online shopping, hates it. My children are older now so not so bad as they were younger (they are neurodivergence so shopping was a nightmare then). My husband is also the driver. When I go shopping (fortnightly) I take an uber home as I am a non driver and go when the kids are at school. I prefer online shopping but you can't also get what you want and it can be pricey. I think my husband feels shopping as a family is quality time together and for my youngest as long as he doesn't need to go to the fridge or freezer it can be cheap entertainment. Things are not always straightforward.

YABU
I wonder if you realise how judgemental and out of touch you sound. You assume this is a matter of choice because in your life you have that choice. There are circumstances in which a family might be obliged to do this.
Maybe the family is in accommodation which has to be vacated during the day, such as B and B.
Taking the whole family shopping means no electricity is being used at home, while everyone is kept relatively warm.
If the parents don’t have a current account nor internet access, online shopping isn’t an option. Of course, one parent could look after the children in the car, but have you ever done that? Dragging the children around Waitrose seems a slightly more attractive option than being trapped in a cold car with bored children.
Btw, what business is it of yours, anyway?

We sometimes go shopping as a family with 2 Dds 2 and 6, this is because I don't drive so don't have the option to go by myself and sometimes it's nice to actually go shopping!

I've done this occasionally - not often because Supermarkets give me panic attacks and I prefer to do an online shop, or even daily trips to the corner shop in order to avoid them, however occasionally we need to go to the supermarket. I don't drive, and as although my partner SHOULD have been capable of following a list, he hated it and would often feel the need to ring me several times if he went alone, which would lead to shouting if I didn't answer the phone fast enough or give him detailed descriptions of where in the shop something would be. Yes, online shopping does exist but sometimes the slots aren't available or lots of items are out of stock, or money is tight that week and we need to try a cheaper shop (aldi and lidl don't deliever) and so supermarkets are unavoidable.

If the mum can't drive it's fjither send DH or all go.

I am someone who always shopped alone or with my DD but I would just like to say that I would have enjoyed not having to take her alone and shopping as a family if my partner had been at all interested in joining us. Having the adult company and sharing the childcare load, whilst browsing the aisles and deciding on meals or items together actually sounds quite fun to me! I would look at a family shopping together and imagine they all get on well and love spending their time together!

DH used to describe taking the 3 DCs shopping as training for holidays: keeping together, no running off, picking things off shelves when asked but not otherwise.

Something must have stuck as all three have or have had supermarket jobs once grown up!

You’d think it’d be easier wouldn’t you , you stay with the kids I’ll do the food shop.
but some people maybe feel like they don’t want to look after the kids on their own .
some people don’t like going out on their own without their partner .
to some yes it is a day out.
or they like to discuss the food on the way round which is also annoying as hell because you can’t get past them they are in the way discussing if it’s chilli tonight or curry .
my Dh liked to go food shopping with me years ago because he liked to input what was bought but the fact he was annoying me with picking practically everything up in the shop like a overgrown child I said no I’m going on my own .
he may call supermarket in the week on his own get his beers that he likes etc or we do a online shop this works well too as he can look what I’ve added to basket and add what he likes .
people can do what they want but yes I agree when I’m in a rush a whole family doing the food shop is incredibly annoying as they get in my way the kids are whinny especially when it’s 8pm .

This always hits its peak during the Christmas grocery shopping bonanza period. Yes it's nice to all go and get treats together but do two adults, 3 teenagers and a small child ALL need to stand in front of the cheese aisle for 10 minutes quarrelling over Cathedral City vs Pilgrims Choice?

The pandemic is over, people are allowed out.

The people I know who do this do it because they want to and it suits them. Presumably exactly the same as you are there, shopping the way you want. There are loads of annoyances when mixing with the general public. Mine is people who stand at the ticket barriers faffing about not with their ticket ready. But such is life, jog on.

Aww, well played OP. You've really achieved something here today @Shiningstarr

Drama. Take the whole family out, just leave the scooters at home and don't allow the kids to play hide-and-seek between the aisles 😇

😂😂😂

Someone actually suggested a controlling relationship as a reason why while families shop together. The mental gymnastics on this thread has been amusing.

A reason to get everyone out the house for some fresh air obviously