Whole families going food shopping

[Shiningstarr]

Just came back from food shopping, there were a couple of young families in there, one in particular, the mum was pushing the trolley, her two young children walking near her and the dad was following with a pram and carrying another toddler.

Surely it would be easier for just mum to go and do the food shop, or just dad? Why bring all those children plus pram? I can't think of anything worse. Both mum and dad looked stressed.

I don't drive, but H does. I do the meal planning and put the shopping list together but H is useless at following our or working out substitutes. Therefore we both have to go with DD tagging along. I wish I could go on my own as well but DD has huge meltdowns if she has to sit and wait in the car. I suppose I could take the bus but I'd have to go into the city to come out again and a 10 minute car journey then turns into a 50 minute bus journey each way.

I know people will say that children need to go shopping to learn how to do these tasks.
Im from a big family and this meant I never went to the supermarket growing up as there were always older siblings at home.
When I was in my late teens I went a few times with my dad (as I got interested in baking) and picked up how it worked quickly, went to uni and coped fine.
DHs mum expected him to follow him around to every single task growing up until his late teens and rebelled. She’s the kind of woman who would
spend 2 hours in the supermarket reading every label.
Guess which of the two of us is useless at shopping.

Then you get DH to drop you and he takes DD to the park and then he collects you.

Everyone would be much happier.

Thought fondly of this thread today as I went to Sainsbury's with my husband and baby in tow

I don’t think anybody’s objected to babies, they don’t run up and down the aisles or pull things off shelves.

@Wouldloveanother okay, it was just a lighthearted comment. Besides, I don't really care if anyone objected to the presence of my baby or not given that I know he wasn't a nuisance.

Babies in supermarkets are one of the few perks. I'm the demented old girl beaming at them.

@Iwantmyoldnameback fabulous!! I absolutely love the people who chat with my baby ❤️

I'm the same. I have to remind myself all the time not to play peekaboo or pull faces to make them smile as well... and I am not always successful..... Babies and kids are great!

Why can’t H drop you off and then take DD to the park or something, and then he picks you up when you’re done?

I’ve not RTFT and I don’t care to but you OP are a person after my own heart.

I think this ALL THE TIME and you know when was worst? Covid times!!! When shopping was like limited to one person per household I rock up to Tezzer’s and a people carrier would pull up, mum, dad, five kids in tow. What the heck?!

it’s a massive bug bear of mine and I’m so glad others feel the same!!

I'm gonna take my kids shopping eeeeevery time now. Might get all 3 a small trolley too!!

The exaggerated nonsense on here!

Have no idea where you all live but I've literally never seen kids behaving the way some of you describe using the finest hyperbole.

All kinds of demographics get on my nerves very occasionally- maybe we should all be banned from going out in case we annoy someone else...

Vintagecreamandcottagepie that's hyperbolic too though ("maybe we should all be banned from going out in case we annoy someone")!

The entire thread is hyperbole on both sides.

There are certainly some absolutely exaggerated claims about the supposed virtues of two parents + children families all shopping together all the time (obviously children learn by doing but if the object was genuinely to teach lifeskills this would be more effectively done in a few targeted trips 1:1 with a parent able to focus on discussing what to pay attention to than just by traipsing around in a big group every time).

Nobody has suggested banning anyone from doing anything.

Nobody has suggested that anyone has to change their behaviour.

Some posters have been extraordinarily defensive and boarderline aggressive about their shopping preferences.

Lots of posters have explained why they shop as a family in a logical way - obviously there are various personal circumstances where it's the best solution.

Everyone gets annoyed by other people at times. Large groups blocking aisles and access to shelves in supermarkets can be annoying.

There's nothing wrong with finding it annoying and venting about it on an internet forum. It is hyperbole to equate expressing annoyance on a forum to actively wanting/ trying to ban the annoying thing!

@PorridgewithQuark

I agree! And it goes round like a circle with increasing hyperbole on both sides!

I think it just grated on lots of us who like to do things together as a family to have that annoy others to the extent the criticisms and descriptions of us shopping together turned into a cross between a family from shamless and monkeys at the zoo. When alot of us were simply responding to what we thought was a genuine question asking for reasons why we like to go shopping as a family.

Nobody is going to change their behaviour from this thread, and those of you who find it annoying will continue to do so.

Totally pointless really!

Vintagecreamandcottagepie 😁

I must admit I find big groups shopping together annoying sometimes, especially when they're quite lacking in awareness of people around them and not really bothering trying to avoid blocking aisles/ shelves or especially ready to move for people trying to access shelves they're standing in front of having a conversation.

However we occasionally go to a supermarket all together ourselves when on a self catering holiday (not at home though, that holds no appeal at all - though I certainly used to take preschool children on my own and still sometimes take one teen especially if they want specific items for some reason) so I'm aware of being a bit of a hypocrite feeling annoyed by something we've done ourselves, if only perhaps once a year!

@PorridgewithQuark

And although we often shop as a family with three children under ten (not the weekly food shop to be fair), once or twice I have found other people's children a bit annoying when on my own 😀

I was pushing the trolley with my happy, smiley and engaged grandson’s ( aged 10 months and 2yrs) in, while out shopping in Lidl’s recently with their mum ( my daughter) when a lady came up and commented on what a beautiful sight it was. I appreciated the comment at the time, but even more so now after reading the mean spirited comments from intolerant, miserable mumsnetters!

Jesus Christ, where on earth do you do your shopping? A nursery?

I shop in a wide variety of supermarkets, and I go at all different times during the week - oh, and I used to work in a supermarket when I was a teenager too - and I just cannot see that this is a frequent enough occurrence to make it into "a thing". I think some people are just addicted to moaning, and when they don't have anything real to moan about they have to make it up.

Why remind yourself not to? I've got a toddler and I love it when people chat to her in the supermarket. During lockdown it was the only social life she had, I used to bring her to the supermarket hoping someone would talk to her!

As a single parent i do my food shopping online it's to stressful or get extra bits when there at school/ nursery and take my youngest near the end of the week . I see like a family of 5 in the supermarket and just think surely it would be easier for one to stay at home . If that's there weekly day out that's sad .

kimchifox · 18/09/2022 15:08
Maybe they have been doing something else and are now doing the food shop on the way home?“

This. Our daughter’s family often stop in the way home.
Or maybe it is their day out and a big deal for the kids. Times are very hard for a lot of people.

Doesn’t bother me, I just get on with my business 🤷‍♀️

Not if you have my DS who loves the supermarket (he's autistic).

My son's Autistic doesn't like it so I try not to take him . The autistic spectrum is a very large scale not all kids like the same thing . Just seems stupid dragging the whole family around tbh

I don't know why everyone came for you in this thread . I understand where your coming from I remember going as a family of four when we younger but kids were so much better behaved in early 200s late 90s . Everyone thinks this post is about the children but it's about whole families taking up isles and not controlling there kids when one could of stayed home . Just makes its stressful for other people

Until this thread, it never occurred to me that this was a 'thing'. I guess we all find different aspects of supermarket shopping a pain. Mine, is when they don't put certain food items together, as you would expect.

But, I'm just grateful I have the money to put decent food on the table. So, that's where my mindset is, most times, while shopping with the masses.