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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think it's a shame we can't pay our respects

518 replies

KeepYaHeadUp · 14/09/2022 10:15

When we initially heard about the funeral plans DH and I said it might be "nice" to take our DC to London (we're just outside) to walk past the Queen in Westminster Hall. They've been very interested in the whole event and are old enough now that they'll remember it and be able to talk about it, etc. so when they independently asked to go we looked into it.

It quickly became apparent it wasn't going to be feasible due to the huge queues etc, so that was knocked on the head. I feel it's a shame but there's no way I'd have them queuing in the rain.

On the news this morning there are a number of people who's caught flights from all over the world to come and be part of it. One pair - a mother and adult son from New York flew over as soon as they heard the Queen had died and are queuing now.

I know it's unreasonable really, but I felt a pang of something - jealousy, irritation, not sure - at these people with money and time to fly for hours to come and pay their respects to our monarch adding to numbers which effectively deny other groups the opportunity. I know there are allowances made for people with disabilities who are unable to queue for up to 30 hours, but what about children/families for whom it's impossible?

OP posts:
Cara87 · 14/09/2022 19:15

RedToothBrush · 14/09/2022 19:05

I've queued over night for things before. Quite frankly if you are even considering it with children under 12 you need your head read.

There are plenty of ways to pay your respects. You can do it in a personal way.

Frankly I don't get the insanity of queuing for 24hrs to walk pass for a few minutes full stop even if you like the Queen.

I honestly wouldn’t put my kids through it. It’s cruel.

lemonyanus · 14/09/2022 19:17

If you really want to take your children to pay their respects OP, maybe a visit to St George's chapel when everything has settled down?

mamabear715 · 14/09/2022 19:17

@DysonSphere I agree, I don't think we'll ever see the like again.
I wish I could be there too, & really don't understand a lot of posts on here. Our Queen could have been a happy countrywoman but made sacrifices for Great Britain (being careful to cover N.I., bloodyhell, don't want to start World War three..) She deserves the public being able to say our last goodbyes and thank you.

bridgetreilly · 14/09/2022 19:26

She deserves the public being able to say our last goodbyes and thank you.

And she is getting that. The only person preventing the OP from going is the OP.

FlissyPaps · 14/09/2022 19:27

If you don’t know the difference between GB and UK then you should have your citizenship stripped. Off with your heads!

Cindie943811A · 14/09/2022 19:42

I saw the first of the general public in the queue file into Westminster Hall and pay their respects. They had spent 2 nights queuing and quite frankly looked like it. They appeared dazed and were looking round as if they weren’t really quite sure where they were.
If they weren’t deluded when they decided they needed to see the royal coffin, then they certainly appeared so afterwards.

The OP is right.Savepeople from this insanity and have equal opportunity viewing. Postpone the funeral for a year and have a viewing in every town hall.

dottiedodah · 14/09/2022 19:49

I dont see the point in queueing for ages myself, however each to their own!Can you not go by yourself, if you are desperate to see the Queens coffin and pay your respects? If you are just outside of London.Children wont understand and it not fair on them .People from around the world may wish to come and pay their respects .

Pumasonsatsumas · 14/09/2022 19:53

I'm with you OP! I'd love to attend but have no-one to watch the children until the weekend. No way I could queue for 2 hours, never mind 30, with my two (both under three). I will try and visit on Friday night but it depends on the length of the queue at that point.

stuntbubbles · 14/09/2022 19:56

I don't think we'll see scenes like this again. It might well be worth taking your children OP, it really is a historic moment.
It’s a queue. Try the post office, or the south circular on a bank holiday weekend.

Porcupineintherough · 14/09/2022 19:57

stuntbubbles · 14/09/2022 19:56

I don't think we'll see scenes like this again. It might well be worth taking your children OP, it really is a historic moment.
It’s a queue. Try the post office, or the south circular on a bank holiday weekend.

🤣🤣🤣

RedToothBrush · 14/09/2022 20:03

Walk to pay tribute? Plant a tree.

user1471452428 · 14/09/2022 20:03

MarinoRoyale · 14/09/2022 10:54

Unsure how I’m not “keeping up” when you’ve posted a couple of times on this thread making it clear that you’d like to go but the wait in the weather for a long time with your kids is putting you off 😂 But crack on trying to shape shift to make it seem like you’re thinking mainly of other children, not your own, it’s amusing if nothing else!

Yeah that "keep up" is so rude. Typical mummy with precious littles (barf) who have good and pure reasons for seeing the old biddy off, unlike those awful hooting and hollering New Yorkers.

Tessabelle74 · 14/09/2022 20:14

So you're complaining that people have flown from the other side of the Atlantic but you can't be arsed to go across the city? 🙄

VladmirsPoutine · 14/09/2022 20:29

Wow. Just wow.

DysonSphere · 14/09/2022 20:50

mamabear715 · 14/09/2022 19:17

@DysonSphere I agree, I don't think we'll ever see the like again.
I wish I could be there too, & really don't understand a lot of posts on here. Our Queen could have been a happy countrywoman but made sacrifices for Great Britain (being careful to cover N.I., bloodyhell, don't want to start World War three..) She deserves the public being able to say our last goodbyes and thank you.

Agree 100%

Cupofteaonesugar · 14/09/2022 20:54

I get it OP.
I live in the north west and so many of my friends have said they would've gone if it wasn't for transport, queues and being so far away. I'm quite surprised by how many people around me want to go!
But all fo that just doesn't work when you have work and children.
I suppose we're lucky in modern day world where you can watch it on tv is you wish whereas in the past this wouldn't have been a possibility!

Notplayingball · 14/09/2022 20:54

Discovereads · 14/09/2022 17:30

Well yes. I can’t afford a tv licence so the BBC live streaming won’t work for me. But that’s ok, I can look up photos online for free 😁

I have no TV licence out of choice. Probably for the best. But like yourself, can see photos of the livestream. Got to wonder how many will get turned away...

Notplayingball · 14/09/2022 20:55

Pumasonsatsumas · 14/09/2022 19:53

I'm with you OP! I'd love to attend but have no-one to watch the children until the weekend. No way I could queue for 2 hours, never mind 30, with my two (both under three). I will try and visit on Friday night but it depends on the length of the queue at that point.

If you have a TV licence you can watch livestream.

DysonSphere · 14/09/2022 20:56

Pumasonsatsumas · 14/09/2022 19:53

I'm with you OP! I'd love to attend but have no-one to watch the children until the weekend. No way I could queue for 2 hours, never mind 30, with my two (both under three). I will try and visit on Friday night but it depends on the length of the queue at that point.

I was thinking there's going to be a rush on Friday as everyone gets off work. Likely to be at least 24 hours by then.

SocksAndTheCity · 14/09/2022 21:01

If it's at all helpful to anyone, I'm in the queue now and it's moving quickly.

I've got from London Bridge to the OXO tower in less than thirty minutes, so if anybody had thought of coming now/tomorrow and been put off by the queuing times it's really not too bad atm and I suspect it won't be until Friday (as per PP above) Smile

lawandgin · 14/09/2022 22:23

@SocksAndTheCity that's so much quicker than expected. How long do you think before you're in?

NippyWoowoo · 14/09/2022 22:41

For those of you going on about TV licenses

SoupDragon · 14/09/2022 22:46

NippyWoowoo · 14/09/2022 22:41

For those of you going on about TV licenses

i have a few concerns about the bearskins and the candles!

VestaTilley · 14/09/2022 22:48

YABU. I’d really have liked to have gone too, but we can’t, because DH and I both work and have a 3 year old.

While we could probably take the day off, we’re not subjecting our 3 year old to 12+ hours shuffling in the rain. It just is what it is, lots of parents of young children, and those too old or infirm, won’t be able to go.

Instead, we’re going to attend our local cathedral’s service of thanksgiving, send letters of condolence and make donations to charities close to Her Late Majesty’s heart.

If you have a garden why not plant a rose named after her? Or find out what her favourite flower was and plant that? A nicer, long term way of paying respects. It’s a shame we can’t all walk by the catafalque to say goodbye, but sometimes these things just can’t be helped. Watch the funeral on TV and raise a gin and dubonnet to her memory. God bless her.

SocksAndTheCity · 14/09/2022 22:53

lawandgin · 14/09/2022 22:23

@SocksAndTheCity that's so much quicker than expected. How long do you think before you're in?

Well I'm just past the London Eye now and heading towards Westminster Bridge - it's definitely slower now but I'm putting that down to the security checks up ahead.

I don't want to jinx myself but I reckon a couple more hours max? Obviously it's still a long wait, but nothing like the 8-12 hours I'd been anticipating.