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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think it's a shame we can't pay our respects

518 replies

KeepYaHeadUp · 14/09/2022 10:15

When we initially heard about the funeral plans DH and I said it might be "nice" to take our DC to London (we're just outside) to walk past the Queen in Westminster Hall. They've been very interested in the whole event and are old enough now that they'll remember it and be able to talk about it, etc. so when they independently asked to go we looked into it.

It quickly became apparent it wasn't going to be feasible due to the huge queues etc, so that was knocked on the head. I feel it's a shame but there's no way I'd have them queuing in the rain.

On the news this morning there are a number of people who's caught flights from all over the world to come and be part of it. One pair - a mother and adult son from New York flew over as soon as they heard the Queen had died and are queuing now.

I know it's unreasonable really, but I felt a pang of something - jealousy, irritation, not sure - at these people with money and time to fly for hours to come and pay their respects to our monarch adding to numbers which effectively deny other groups the opportunity. I know there are allowances made for people with disabilities who are unable to queue for up to 30 hours, but what about children/families for whom it's impossible?

OP posts:
FlissyPaps · 14/09/2022 17:21

Notplayingball · 14/09/2022 17:07

I have already posted about this....

Good for you….

Octomore · 14/09/2022 17:21

She said "people wishing to pay their respects should be Great British", and Great Britain doesn't actually include NI.

I doubt the poster realised that though.

Octomore · 14/09/2022 17:24

It often appears to me that the people who are keenest to gatekeep what counts as "British" / "English" are the least informed about the terms they are using and how they apply to different parts of the British Isles.

Beetlewings · 14/09/2022 17:29

There are other ways to pay your respects. You don't need to physically be there. Plant a fruit bush. Walk in the forest. Go to church

Discovereads · 14/09/2022 17:30

FlissyPaps · 14/09/2022 17:21

Good for you….

Well yes. I can’t afford a tv licence so the BBC live streaming won’t work for me. But that’s ok, I can look up photos online for free 😁

bbcdefg · 14/09/2022 17:31

Octomore · 14/09/2022 17:21

She said "people wishing to pay their respects should be Great British", and Great Britain doesn't actually include NI.

I doubt the poster realised that though.

This. 100%. (Which I also pointed out).

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 14/09/2022 17:34

TerrysGotPeeves · 14/09/2022 16:43

Really, @GonnaGetGoingReturns , so you think people from England, Scotland, and Wales should get priority, but not people from Northern Ireland? May I ask why?

sorry I forgot to include NI. My mistake and not intentional.

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 14/09/2022 17:34

bbcdefg · 14/09/2022 17:31

This. 100%. (Which I also pointed out).

United Kingdom then. Is that the correct term to include NI? And definitely not excluding NI on purpose.

saturdaymorningbored · 14/09/2022 17:37

With regards to those with disabilities not being able to queue, here in Edinburgh there was a different queue so everyone could see her. I'd imagine this is the same in London

Porcupineintherough · 14/09/2022 17:38

It always amazes me, the number of parents who think that the passing of another human being is primarily an instructive learning opportunity for their children.

SoupDragon · 14/09/2022 17:39

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 14/09/2022 17:34

United Kingdom then. Is that the correct term to include NI? And definitely not excluding NI on purpose.

Yes. it's "the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland"

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 14/09/2022 17:40

Octomore · 14/09/2022 17:24

It often appears to me that the people who are keenest to gatekeep what counts as "British" / "English" are the least informed about the terms they are using and how they apply to different parts of the British Isles.

Well done on trying to make out I'm least informed. I do know that NI is part of UK and not GB.

My family on one side is mostly direct German/French FFS so I'm no way a staunch English/British person.

And due to helping family out with childcare I've driven across London to help out so sadly haven't been able to reply immediately here!

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 14/09/2022 17:40

SoupDragon · 14/09/2022 17:39

Yes. it's "the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland"

Thank you!

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 14/09/2022 17:42

DysonSphere · 14/09/2022 17:16

She said 'etc'. As in 'and so on' which includes NI. Not a very thorough sentence..but implied nonetheless.
At least that's the way I read it.

Yes that is what I meant.

TerrysGotPeeves · 14/09/2022 18:31

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 14/09/2022 17:34

United Kingdom then. Is that the correct term to include NI? And definitely not excluding NI on purpose.

Yes, it's the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.

Sorry for being chippy, I'm sure it wasn't intentional.

But then does that kind of prove the point? That people forget that NI is part of the UK?

TerrysGotPeeves · 14/09/2022 18:39

DysonSphere · 14/09/2022 17:16

She said 'etc'. As in 'and so on' which includes NI. Not a very thorough sentence..but implied nonetheless.
At least that's the way I read it.

Yeah, but it takes almost as little time to type NI as it does to type etc, doesn't it? So why not just include NI?

SoupDragon · 14/09/2022 18:41

TerrysGotPeeves · 14/09/2022 18:39

Yeah, but it takes almost as little time to type NI as it does to type etc, doesn't it? So why not just include NI?

She also didn't type "Scotland" so etc is significantly shorter.

TerrysGotPeeves · 14/09/2022 18:46

That's because Scotland is part of Great Britain, so there was no need to type it. Great Britain literally includes Scotland, Wales, and England, so there was no need to clarify, was there?

Cara87 · 14/09/2022 18:52

You’re clearly being unreasonable OP but I kind of get it.

i get annoyed when I try to book things like santas grotto, bookshop singings for kids etc and it’s all booked up within a day (by all the stay at home mums )

absolutely irrational and I am totally unreasonable but I still get annoyed.

giveovernate · 14/09/2022 18:53

@TerrysGotPeeves no one I know forgets that NI is part of GB!

bbcdefg · 14/09/2022 18:53

TerrysGotPeeves · 14/09/2022 18:46

That's because Scotland is part of Great Britain, so there was no need to type it. Great Britain literally includes Scotland, Wales, and England, so there was no need to clarify, was there?

This.

bbcdefg · 14/09/2022 18:53

giveovernate · 14/09/2022 18:53

@TerrysGotPeeves no one I know forgets that NI is part of GB!

That's because NI isn't part of GB.

Bubblebubblebah · 14/09/2022 18:56

giveovernate · 14/09/2022 18:53

@TerrysGotPeeves no one I know forgets that NI is part of GB!

It's not part of GB.

Here you go guys. Now it can turn back to who gets special queue

To think it's a shame we can't pay our respects
DysonSphere · 14/09/2022 18:56

Well, watching the scenes of people paying their respects, I really wish I could go and pay mine (Although I sort of did in the way I could already) I don't think we'll see scenes like this again. It might well be worth taking your children OP, it really is a historic moment. Seen several what appear to be young teens paying their respects. It's quite moving to see old, young, and people of all cultures paying their respects.

A unique moment.

RedToothBrush · 14/09/2022 19:05

I've queued over night for things before. Quite frankly if you are even considering it with children under 12 you need your head read.

There are plenty of ways to pay your respects. You can do it in a personal way.

Frankly I don't get the insanity of queuing for 24hrs to walk pass for a few minutes full stop even if you like the Queen.