To think it's a shame we can't pay our respects

[KeepYaHeadUp]

When we initially heard about the funeral plans DH and I said it might be "nice" to take our DC to London (we're just outside) to walk past the Queen in Westminster Hall. They've been very interested in the whole event and are old enough now that they'll remember it and be able to talk about it, etc. so when they independently asked to go we looked into it.

It quickly became apparent it wasn't going to be feasible due to the huge queues etc, so that was knocked on the head. I feel it's a shame but there's no way I'd have them queuing in the rain.

On the news this morning there are a number of people who's caught flights from all over the world to come and be part of it. One pair - a mother and adult son from New York flew over as soon as they heard the Queen had died and are queuing now.

I know it's unreasonable really, but I felt a pang of something - jealousy, irritation, not sure - at these people with money and time to fly for hours to come and pay their respects to our monarch adding to numbers which effectively deny other groups the opportunity. I know there are allowances made for people with disabilities who are unable to queue for up to 30 hours, but what about children/families for whom it's impossible?

Is that true though? Every funeral I've been to has been around the coffin. Either at the hearse before leaving or in the crematorium/ church. It's only when they have been buried / cremated we've lit candles and visited plaques or headstones.

I think the fact it's a monarch, not a family member, means people are unlikely to pay their respects each year - it's a one off because it's fresh in people's minds

Perhaps they could take the Queen door to door for everyone to have a look? International tour to follow. Not everyone can leave their house, after all.

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If the link's worked this is the queue for King George VI lying in state. There were queues of over four miles long for his apparently.

The Queen's queue cut off point is five miles. So very similar. And his was in February. At least we're 50-50 on the chance of bad weather in September!

Churchill's queue was up to a mile long and took about three hours if you were at the end. But neither he nor King George VI probably had the additional bag searches etc that we have to have in place today.

@Mumspair1 - I'm not offended on anyone's behalf. I'm questioning whether it's been done in the fairest way or whether it's a shame that lots of people who might want to go have been excluded because it's essentially an endurance test.

Well there we go, the most entitled and stupidest thing I have heard all week.

Thank you for this. It's really helpful and I think there are many people who will tune in to the live stream

My children don't demand a ball pit OR a corpse. Do I win?

flipping heck, you are being a bit precious OP. Not every experience can be tailormade to every individual. There will definitely be older people with limited mobility struggling but doing it because it's really important to them.

Do you think the coffin should be delivered door to door for everyone's express convenience? If you want to go and pay your respects in that way rather than just laying some flowers or lighting a candle at home, then you have to go and queue and grit your teeth and shuffle your feet and just get on with it.

Can’t believe I’m reading this, self indulgent whingeing.
You can pay your respects, in lots of ways, joining the queue to view the coffin isn’t the only way.
You want a day out with the kids but can’t be arsed to put the effort in, like the other hoards of people will have to do.
If you want to go, just go, but don’t expect special treatment, because you don’t want to queue for hours like others will have to.

I know it's unreasonable really, but I felt a pang of something - jealousy, irritation, not sure - at these people with money and time to fly for hours to come and pay their respects to our monarch adding to numbers which effectively deny other groups the opportunity.

English queens for English people, eh...!

I'm with you OP, I've given up on going too because I can't queue for lengths of time they're talking about. I feel very sad about it

@BloodAndFire - so what's the ball pit reference all about?

Well, because someone has died! A real person, not like a character in Harry Potter or Game of Thrones.

I'm going to quietly slink away now and stop quoting the OP, but this is all really too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too much.

what time does the coffin leave bp today -sorry ot

I'm not English, as it happens. And I think she was British. Died in Scotland

Exactly. The Queen was Head of the Commonwealth so that's, what, 14 countries that can count her as 'their Queen' plus there are British people living all over the world. There was a woman who flew in from California - but she was British born. So who's NOT allowed to come over here at the moment OP?

@LondonJax - I'm not even from the commonwealth. That's not what this is about as hard as you try to make it

I think yabu. You can pay your respects (quite literally and more usefully) by donating what you might have spent on travel to one of the charities she supported. That would be far better than looking at a coffin. You can see the coffin on videos. It is completely unnecessary for anyone other than her family and friends and therefore it's fine for the queue to be an endurance test. It's not something that people need to access like food, water, fuel, whatever.

This is so disturbing.

An elderly woman has lost her life, her whole family are having to grieve in public and greet hundreds of disgusting grief tourists everyday, cameras and phones in their faces so they can post it to social media.

Her coffin is being live streamed and paraded round like the Olympic torch, making this whole thing into a circus.

Going to look at or walk round a coffin that holds someone grandmother is not respect. How on earth is that showing respect?

Showing respect would be accepting that her, her family and loved ones deserve privacy. Not complain and argue about the “less fortunate” or “disabled” not being able to catch a glimpse of her coffin in person.

You should be ashamed of yourself. And anyone else who thinks they are deserving of this.

I couldn't stand up for days as I have a painful disability. But I feel I paid my respects already

Some elderly are more fit and in better health than others the same age, and those can endure the queues. Others who have had the late Queen as their Sovereign for as much as 60, 70 or 80 years or so, won't be able to do it or pay their last respects or whatever, but a tourist who has had her as their monarch for 0 years will be able to, and that doesn't seem quite fair to them. Even though there's no hard basis to change it really.

@FlissyPaps - it's a state funeral. Can't easily square that away with a small, private service.

State funerals should be banned.

Absolutely disgusting and disrespectful to parade someone’s death.

Vile grief tourism.

Why does everything have to be child friendly? No child has the slightest interest in queuing for 30 minutes for anything in the rain, never mind 30 hours, unless dragged there by their parents. And no adult actually needs to go there to pay their respects, unless they want to. I am not seeing any problem that needs a solution. It smacks much more of entitlement and “me, me, me”. I want to, therefore I should be able to, rather than any mark of respect to the deceased .

@FlissyPaps - I have no view either way. But it's a state funeral so it's a bit weird to demand people look the other way