To think it's a shame we can't pay our respects

[KeepYaHeadUp]

When we initially heard about the funeral plans DH and I said it might be "nice" to take our DC to London (we're just outside) to walk past the Queen in Westminster Hall. They've been very interested in the whole event and are old enough now that they'll remember it and be able to talk about it, etc. so when they independently asked to go we looked into it.

It quickly became apparent it wasn't going to be feasible due to the huge queues etc, so that was knocked on the head. I feel it's a shame but there's no way I'd have them queuing in the rain.

On the news this morning there are a number of people who's caught flights from all over the world to come and be part of it. One pair - a mother and adult son from New York flew over as soon as they heard the Queen had died and are queuing now.

I know it's unreasonable really, but I felt a pang of something - jealousy, irritation, not sure - at these people with money and time to fly for hours to come and pay their respects to our monarch adding to numbers which effectively deny other groups the opportunity. I know there are allowances made for people with disabilities who are unable to queue for up to 30 hours, but what about children/families for whom it's impossible?

Other people are more willing to put the effort in than you are. How can you resent that?

It’s a bit weird to feel jealous of other grief tourists who are planning on making a “respectful” trip to see the coffin. And very weird to refer to the whole circus as an endurance test.

@FlissyPaps I agree, but it's worth noting that this circus is what the Queen wanted for a reason.

The whole family, 'The Firm', has a strong vested interest in perpetuating the mythology and spectacle of the whole thing. This kind of ceremonial activity is what gives the monarchy its power and mystique. Its what enables the royal family to maintain their lives (massively privileged, but with the knowledge that their status could, in theory, be taken away overnight).

By making individual sacrifices at a time of grief, they know that they are reinforcing the status and position of the monarchy for themselves and their heirs. Charles going around the UK signing proclamations and giving speeches is best viewed as a campaign tour - it's all about cementing his family's role.

The Queen grew up with the spectre of revolution (and the death of monarchies overseas) in very recent memory - she will have known exactly how much the pageantry mattered.

That's strange, given one of the reasons trotted for why we need the RF (and why they don't pay inheritance tax) is that they bring in all the lovely tourist moolah.

Absolutely this
It's gone beyond dignified and respectful now for me

Already remarked on this.

But you have the same opportunity as the people who flew in from New York to join the queue. You chose not to.

I think it is madness.

But there again I would have a walk past on the other side as well. That way it would be 15 hours of queuing instead of 30 hours.

@mum2bee2022 @nachoavocado

The ordinary queue has wristbands labelled with the exact time you joined the queue. If you have to leave to use the loo or get food, you go back to the place where your number is. Stewards are meant to make sure that people don't take the piss and go for ages, but I'm not sure how exactly that will play out. There are a lot of stewards on duty, as well as police.

The accessible/disabled queue is limited in length. You get a timed entry slot then come back to queue at that time. There's 1 carer allowed per disabled person.

Interesting.

So feasibly, you can pop to a local restaurant and eat and come back to the queue??

I think the only answer is for the Queen to lay in state for a month. Maybe 2.

Then everyone with or without children can go and say they were there pay their respects.

But even if it had been done by a lottery,which I think was one of your suggestions, then it would have involved standing, queuing, and some people having to make awkward travel arrangements if their lottery time turned out to be 3: 00 am.

Some things are never going to be resolved “fairly”, and this is one of them.

(I have just realised that I am going to get inadvertently caught up in all of this as an innocent bystander as the queue is stretching along the Southbank and I have theatre tickets for the NT this evening. ) 😐

Or queue!

Apparently they'll be giving out wrist bands so you van leave for food, loos etc and come back, I tyhink they did a similar thing in Edinburgh.

Exactly. I don't think anyone whether they're a tourist or not, should be taking selfies by statues of ex-Royals etc. If I see someone has managed to take a selfie of themselves with the lying in wait coffin I'll scream... (joking), I mean surely that should be a capital punishment offence (again joking).

But this is what I mean. Surely if the monarch or leader of any country has died, you pay respects quietly and especially to the people living in that country/subjects of that country. Two friends of mine, one Bosnian, one Polish who are both British subjects (did the ceremony) have told me they're really upset by the Queen's passing, are planning to visit the lying in state (with/without children) and feel very sad as they consider themselves British (but obviously Bosnian/Yugoslav, Polish by birth and upbringing and heritage). Where's the respect here in climbing the Victoria memorial for a selfie FFS?

This is some of the worst gaslighting I've read on MN.

If you truly regarding the Queen as a monarch to countries all over the world, you wouldn't begrudge their citizens travelling from afar to pay their respects, and you wouldn't be whinging that you have to queue because you have kids.

@viques - that's a good point re the lottery system.

Go to Green park and look at the flowers. We did that last weekend and it was nice

Actually, the OP has far greater opportunity than people in New York. She doesn't have to fly over, arrange tickets, own a passport etc. She can just take a short journey into Central London.

Similarly, the OP has greater opportunity that people living in the North, or the Hebrides etc. If I wanted to go, travelling there and back would take a day on its own.

Unless the royals organise some kind of travelling coffin tour, people won't have the same opportunity to view it. And that's fine. That's just how life is sometimes.

I think you'll find the members of the Royal family are pleased to accompany her coffin around.

The ceremony ensures continued interest in them.

I don't really see the difference from the way celebrities are looked upon. Also I don't think it's disgusting. She was a head of state, not a minor individual. Not a celebrity.

Crowned before onlookers. Anointed before her subjects.

So also in death.

Some things are simply not "fair". You cannot make events lik this accessible to absolutely everyone. It always comes down to reasonableness.
Like someone with IBS might not be able to wait there, someone on low income/childcare/job from 4 hours away won't get there.

Such is life. However, if we split the queue then I propose net contributors to have fat track😁 We've been financing it a while

I don't really see what other way of managing this there is. Thousands of people are descending on London to see the same thing. Obviously there has to be security measures and order in place. How else can you police it and manage the queues?

There is no chance I'd queue for that long and I certainly wouldn't be dragging kids along too. But we will mark it in another way and plan to watch the funeral as a family.

I do wonder how people are managing to go to the loo!

Just think for how long they will bore their friends and relations with talk about 'when I saw the Queen', it will be never-ending!

Your children can’t be taken out in the rain.

@eldora - I honestly don't know what to tell you. The reason I used the example of people flying in from other countries was because that was the news story I happened to catch while eating my breakfast and while I was initially impressed that anyone would be that desperate to pay their respects I was also struck by the fact that I live incredibly close in comparison and just can't attend even though my children have asked to because of the massive queues. The initial feeling was jealousy at people with the time and money being able to attend when capacity concerns meant we couldn't.

I'm just paraphrasing my post as far as I can tell. You spin it however you want to