To ask my bridesmaids to contribute towards there make up

[helloits]

I am getting married soon and would like the opinions on whether it's reasonable for me to ask my 4 bridesmaids to pay £20 towards having their make up done on my wedding day? Overall it's £60 each so I would pay the rest and be saving £80 in total. I am going to pay for their hair as well.
The reason I ask is I have been bridesmaid for 3 of them (the most recent one being a few months ago) and they paid for both hair and makeup and didn't ask for any contribution.
We have a budget for our wedding and I don't want to go over that so trying to save where I can.

The reason I did a reverse was because I wanted honest opinions and I find people on here will just go against whatever the OP says whether they agree or not. So I felt like coming at it very matter of factly without emotion (which I have) would give me a better picture of whether the bride is being unreasonable. Sorry I didn't realise doing reverses pissed people off around here 🙈 wouldn't have owned up to it if I did!

Can I ask why?

This is why I did a reverse. Because I have no doubt in my mind you wouldn't have said that if you thought I was the bride.

You know it’s quite insulting to post a reverse?
You’re telling us that we’re too thick to answer objectively.
When, in the history of AIBU, did posters have to worry that replies would only be in their favour? 🤣

I 100% would of said exactly the same - as its true. I have been a bridesmaid and its been paid for and not paid for. I dont begrudge paying for it to be done when it's an extra that I'm capable of paying for myself if I wanted it to be done which I did. If I couldn't afford it or didn't want to I would of just done it myself.

@helloits “The reason I did a reverse was because I wanted honest opinions and I find people on here will just go against whatever the OP says whether they agree or not”

This just isn’t true. If that’s what you think - and it’s insulting - why bother posting here?

I’ve just looked at the first 16 AIBUs with votes right now. 16 because the data was obvious and I got bored.
12 - YANBU, agreeing with the OP
3 - YABU
1 - seems it’s a dead heat on the Union Jack outside 🤣

Yeah, I’m sad 🤣 but this is why reverses are so irritating to me - they’re just rude, assuming we can’t just answer a question without being manipulated into objectivity 🤷🏻‍♀️

You have no idea if she can afford it or not. It's called budgeting. Not everyone wants to spend their life savings on one day.

I think the bias towards agreement is simply that this board is only partly for genuine dilemmas, the majority just want to let off steam and know that they’re not unreasonable at all!

Yup

It's £80 not £800. It's a wedding, they are expensive, so £80 will be a drop in the ocean. Do each other's / get a trainee to do a deal for you (local colleges are great for this).

FFS-I hate reverse posts-they should be deleted and the users banned!

Sorry but I think if you can't afford it then you have too many bridesmaids?

Fair enough I get that. If I'm being honest I would have understood being asked to pay for all of it but paying £20 seems a bit petty to me. Either pay all or not at all would be more sensible and make a lot more sense. Saving £80 when you've already spent ££££s just feels tight. We have had to pay for 2 nights in an expensive hotel, 2 hen dos away and wedding gift. I'm of the opinion of your wedding you pay. If you aren't having a MUA fair enough wouldn't expect it but it's tight to ask for £20 towards it (when you've already booked and paid for all of it) especially when you know how well off the couple are.
This is why I wanted opinions though because I'm struggling to see the other side of the argument here and maybe I'm letting my emotions take over and see the bigger picture.

Sorry I genuinely didn't know they were so hated I just felt like I could explain it more objectively and with less emotion if it was reversed and therefore get a better understanding of whether I'm being unreasonable to feel annoyed.

@noclothesinbed

My wedding cost £27 and I have been able to afford everything I needed since. Do understand what a marriage actually is?

Everyone saying you shouldn't get married if you can't afford to pay for your bridesmaids MUA are the same people who say it's rude and distasteful to have a paid bar....

I've said that I will pay for my bridesmaids to have their hair done and then they can either pay for their own makeup or do it themselves. Only one has said she will pay, the others are all happy to do their own.

🙄

Anyone who posts a reverse is unreasonable. Cough up.

For goodness sake; it’s twenty quid and doing a reverse. Time to catch a grip.

No, you can’t ask. It would be really mean.

£60 each??
I'm in the wrong job........

Just seen it’s a reverse. 😡😖

I’m going to be a bridesmaid next year,if they ask me to contribute I’ll back out of being one,I don’t even particularly want to be a bridesmaid either.

You pay.

🤣🤣