To worry we gave away 100k of my inheritance!

[howdidIgetthere]

My DH thinks I am, but if I'm right then it's in his interest to say that!

Basically, we were in a pickle buying a house last year. We were consolidating houses with my DF to purchase a big house, and hoped that myself of my DF could be on the mortgage or deeds as a safety due to my DF helping with the deposit.

To cut a long story and identifying details this wasn't possible. Neither of us could be on a plausible mortgage, and the lenders wouldn't like us on the deeds either. But we needed a house. So as I was already engaged, we agreed between us that my DF would 'gift' 100k of inheritance to my DH so that he could solely purchase the house, but we would get married beforehand to safeguard my stake.

So we eloped without telling anyone else, my DF gifted the money and the house was purchased in my DH's name only. We had a proper wedding a few weeks after and all is well. As far as I know, because the house was purchased after marriage, I have a stake in the house should we divorce, and can get some of that value back in lieu of my inheritance/not be left with no money and nowhere to live.

However, since the purchase the house has had extensive renovations and its value is increasing significantly. I have noticed that my DH keeps referring to people that the purchase date was back in the summer, months before our marriage. I know for a fact from the deeds etc that the closing date was not until a month after we were married, when the funds were transferred. Before the marriage, the mortgage may just have been accepted, but zero money had been exchanged.

When I ask him about this he says iabu for questioning him, that yes he bought it before we got married ie he's taking the acceptance of an offer on the house as when he bought it. This is obviously very worrying for me, as if he bought it before we were married or some other loophole then in the case of divorce I have lost most of my inheritance and have no stake on the house!!!

I don't know why he is saying this as at the time he agreed it was the best option so that all parties were happy and protected. I have resisted a marital rights notice on the deeds, but otherwise I am still not on the deeds or the mortgage (I don't have a high enough income). So who is BU? Have we been misled and given away my inheritance, or is my DH wrong and for some reason trying to say something that's incorrect?

Sorry mean if you're putting money into deposit hen you should be on deeds.

Who told you this? There is no IHT on bequests from one spouse to another.

I believe that only applies to UK residents.I may be wrong but I’d much rather have my property in my name than have to scour the small print of .gov.uk for changes in tax laws.

Have you seen Tindler Swindler? Has he used someone else's 100k and now he might have stashed yours away?

I am referring to UK tax, yes.

If you're both resident overseas, in an overseas property, it will depend on the law of the relevant country.

Was he in prison? 😆

Sorry but this all seems a bit far fetched, surely no one is this gullible?

i don’t know any good lawyer that would allow your parent to gift money into your partners name to buy a house for his child and grandchildren.
you need an independent lawyer, this thread gets harder to understand what has actually happened. I hope you fix it !

What the fuck is wrong with your husband?! Why is he keeping financial things from you when he took 100k of YOUR father's money? Definitely see a solicitor and definitely don't tell him. I'd be squirrelling some of that money away with your debit card as well. There's no reason why he can't tell you what's in his will. You need to stay standing up for yourself and not let yourself be treated like a child.

Haven't RTFT, but I'm glad you're seeking legal advice. Please talk to the solicitor (at least initially) without your DH so you can fully explain the situation without him getting defensive.

I can only share my personal experience. I'd stopped working to do a Master's when we bought out first house. As I'd saved up the entire (sizeable) deposit, however, there was no way I wasn't going to be joint on everything. We got a joint mortgage and deeds.

I'd also advise you to always be wary of mortgage brokers, as they're essentially selling mortgage products. Some are good, obviously, but their motivation is to "sell" you the mortgage, they're not interested in the legal ramifications down the line. One mortgage broker suggested to us that I needn't be on the mortgage...we didn't use him! When you refinance in a few years, make sure that you're in all the meetings.

The house is bought on completion - when all funds are given to the seller and you received the keys, not upon accepting the offer (means nothing), not even on exchange.
As for the 'gift', there is a paper or electronic trail at the very least, and your husband was probably made to demonstrate how he got the funds.

.

Are you? What does your post contribute?

I wasn’t earning (had a new baby and a toddler ) when we bought our house but I own it jointly with DH .

Your story isnt adding up, your profile doesn't make sense.

Why was the marriage a rush?

How old is your dad and why were you worried about him being alone?

As a high earner why was your DH struggling to find you guys somewhere to rent?

Stop talking about a career, start focusing on a job. And nobody TTC just as they start a career anyway.

Something isnt making sense here and I have a strong feeling you are deliberately holding back information.

Theres also a major piece of the puzzle I dont understand: why would your father give you 100K by giving it to your husband? Why wouldn't he give you 100K directly?

JFC OP. Get some bombproof legal advice, and fast.

What has having a low credit rating got to do with getting a mortgage. The fact that you are married to the person who took out a mortgage means the mortgage company will have done a credit check on you and they still gave your Dh a mortgage.

Don’t know who this mortgage broker is but I smell a rat or someone who doesn’t know about mortgages.

I have been on all deeds and mortgages on property dh have owned. Several places we have bought I haven’t been working

And she looks after his children, supports him and takes care of the house whole studying for me masters. Giving 100k investment is not living for free. If he is such a high earner, why did ge need the 100k?
He is DAF. She should have been.more involved, not fobbed off. She should know what's in his will. He should be willing and able to do what needs to be done to secure her future. She has hildren, he has children but non together.
Is the marriage based on love? Are there cultural differences where the woman is not part of the process but in the background?
What is the age difference?
How long have they been together?
All these things do matter because he doesn't sound forthcoming. Red flags flying all over the place.

Does 'registering marital rights' put you ON the deeds?

When I bought my house, only my name was on the mortgage & deeds, it didn't stop exh going for half when we divorced.

@TheHumanExperience he is stalling, too busy at work, she’s worried he may not put her on deeds etc. red flags all over the place. Df seems in on it too. Could be cultural as where I’m from fathers are practically selling their daughters still, pull the wool over their eyes and keep them sheltered so they don’t ask questions and go along with everything. I don’t think she was at any meetings and she’s just telling us what the men in her family have been telling her which is why so much doesn’t seem to make sense maybe because it’s BS. I hope I’m wrong but too many red flags for someone whose taken £100k from someone’s df but is talking to her like it’s him doing her a favour and op seems uneasy with that but doesn’t seem sure of herself. They’ve done a number on her.

Well, a house purchase is only final once you complete, not when an offer is made, so your DH is wrong about that.
Secondly, a house is a marital asset whether it was bought before or after the marriage, as that is the home that you both share.

So your DH is wrong on both counts, and it doesn't matter what he says - the law won't change just to suit him. More worrying is that he's saying it at all - is he hoping to distort the truth to get his hands on a bigger lump of money if you divorce? Why would he even be thinking that way so soon after you just got married? Or is there some weird Mr Billy Big Balls thing where he likes to tell himself that he bought the house and is Mr Provider of the Family? That's less worrying, but still doesn't imply he sees you both as equals.

What do you want from this? To get something in writing to back up your legal rights, or just to understand his weird lies?

You are doing the right thing to get your own legal and financial advice. Not being on the mortgage is odd, even if it was being calculated totally on his salary. Also know you can't go into it because it's outing, but if he's a 'high earner' who is older, strange that it was so hard to find a mortgage and he had to rely on your DF for the deposit. Also it seems the way he operates around money and using work as an excuse will wear thin.

On the positive side, you have given the money to someone you know, someone you live with and know facts about, someone you have in fact married, which is a lot better than having given it to, say, a stranger on the internet who romanced and then scammed you and turned out to be catfishing you, as well.

I was thinking this as well. There is so much misinformation and bad advice on this thread.

Whilst it’s not true, it’s not at all common for lenders to allow a second party to be on the registered title and not on the mortgage. I don’t think it’s helpful to be saying this to the OP as she will not be able to get on the Deeds without her DH’s lenders approval and its highly likely they would reject this (unless she was able to be on the mortgage as well) as their security would be compromised.

Ultimately, the OP and her DH made a decision to have the mortgage in her DH’s sole name to get better interest rates. People with poor credit ratings/SAHM’s can still get mortgages as mentioned upthread but lenders will not give their best interest rates to those.