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AIBU?

AIBU in not tipping?

136 replies

Thecarpetisbeige · 06/09/2022 08:25

Here in the UK we have the national minimum wage laws so anyone working in a restaurant should be paid at least that. I get that it's not a lot of money (I'm not on much more myself) however I could go into a retail store, let's say Primark and a shop assistant could give me absolutely amazing customer service but I'm not allowed to tip her. That Primark staff member could be paid the same wage as a waitress serving me in a restaurant whose service is very basic i.e. taking a food/drink order and bringing the food to the table without a smile or any friendly chat, yet they expect a tip?

Years ago dining out used to be an experience, waiters/waitresses made chat with you, told jokes etc, really made your experience something extra special so I could maybe understand wanting to tip someone in those circumstances but there isn't a lot of that anymore. Most dining out in recent years is just someone taking your order and bringing it to your table (i.e. doing their job in which their employer pays them a wage).

I was having a chat with a colleague the other day and they said it's stingy not to tip but I just feel it's not necessary in the UK. In America a lot of states don't have any minimum wage requirements and so some American staff work solely on tips so tipping is sort of built into ther culture.

But in the UK there are loads of roles where people are paid the national minimum wage or just above but those specifically working in hospitality seem to expect tips.

AIBU in not wanting to pay tips?

OP posts:
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pawkins · 06/09/2022 21:18

Lyla82 · 06/09/2022 21:06

The cleaners I know earn £15 an hour, so £5.50 more per hour than waiting staff on minimum wage. Just some food for thought for you...

You don’t know many cleaners other than self employed ones then….
Cleaners are on minimum wage but I’m sure that doesn’t agree with your narrative that only waiting staff are ‘deserving’ of tips.

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Senseofsomething · 06/09/2022 21:21

I don’t mind the idea of tipping but it sometimes feels kind of awkward. And I don’t quite know how to do it when paying. If I’m paying by card and the machine gives a y/n to add a tip that’s straightforward. I wish people who want tips always made it so it was that easy to add one or not!

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Sporty2022 · 06/09/2022 22:03

Quite a few restaurants charge 10% service charge to a bill. This is a tip basically.

Personally, I think it’s a bit of a cheek. If a meal came to £200, a £20 tip would seem rather excessive. Is the service really worth £20 in that case? And who actually would benefit from that tip? How much would that particular server get ?

Wasn’t there a court ruling saying service charges didn’t have to be paid unless you were fully made aware before you pay your bill?

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Lyla82 · 06/09/2022 22:18

DobbyHasASock · 06/09/2022 21:13

Here's se professions that get minimum wage and no tip.
Are they less worthy of a tip?
Are you happy those in these professions subsidise the wages of those in catering, despite often being in higher responsibility roles.

Carer
Teaching assistant
Nursery nurse
Childminder
Healthcare assistant

I think you need to change your name to DobbyHasABeeInHerBonnet. I'm just stating a fact that all of the cleaners I know make more than minimum wage.
And if any of the people in those professions you have listed want to earn tips, then they could go and work in a restaurant instead as it is customary to receive tips there! People have a choice, just as it is your choice to not tip.
Seriously, let it go.

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Lyla82 · 06/09/2022 22:24

pawkins · 06/09/2022 21:18

You don’t know many cleaners other than self employed ones then….
Cleaners are on minimum wage but I’m sure that doesn’t agree with your narrative that only waiting staff are ‘deserving’ of tips.

When did I once say only waiting staff deserve tips? I didn't. I simply stated it is customary to tip in restaurants. If you don't want to then don't, but don't make stuff up just because you don't like my view.

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pawkins · 06/09/2022 22:41

Lyla82 · 06/09/2022 22:24

When did I once say only waiting staff deserve tips? I didn't. I simply stated it is customary to tip in restaurants. If you don't want to then don't, but don't make stuff up just because you don't like my view.

It isn’t customary in the UK.

It is customary in the US where servers don’t receive a minimum wage.

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DobbyHasASock · 06/09/2022 23:04

Yes, everyone should leave and go work in restaurants.
That will work out well next time you need childcare, elderly care or healthcare.

Use your critical thinking skills, why are you happy to import American culture which allows people to be paid appallingly and taken advantage of?
Is this something we should emulate?
Or do you think claps are sufficient payment?

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Puzzledandpissedoff · 06/09/2022 23:07

One restaurant I London added a 20% service charge, which I questioned and the waiter told me he didn't get it anyway

Standard story I'm afraid; a significant %, realising there could be a little extra coming, will lie - though it's equally true that some managers really do stiff their staff out of the tips

Personally I don't involve myself in what are their own employment matters to address; I do tip, but only for exceptional service rather than the basic job

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HailAdrian · 06/09/2022 23:11

I work in hospitality and I don't care if you don't tip but if you go straight home and leave a bad review because it's busy and short staffed, you're a dick.

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ivegotdreadfulpmttoday · 06/09/2022 23:24

My BIL doesn't tip and we have to be careful when splitting the bill. So
I'll say it's £40 each plus tip. He'll let everyone pay first and then say to the waiter that he's paying the balance (I.e everyone else's tip comes off his amount and the waiter gets no tip). He's really tight though and it makes his show offiness about money ring hollow.

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Lyla82 · 07/09/2022 06:23

DobbyHasASock · 06/09/2022 23:04

Yes, everyone should leave and go work in restaurants.
That will work out well next time you need childcare, elderly care or healthcare.

Use your critical thinking skills, why are you happy to import American culture which allows people to be paid appallingly and taken advantage of?
Is this something we should emulate?
Or do you think claps are sufficient payment?

Of course claps aren't sufficient! You can't just clap on your doorstep like a brainwashed seal, you must also get your children to draw them a big 'thank you' sign with rainbow colours and give them 10% off Costa Coffee.

But I think we digress...

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