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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be actually really worried about you? NHS related

282 replies

Itsonthestairs · 31/08/2022 00:32

As a highly skilled NHS nurse of 15 years I had to leave my job due to the stress and not being able to provide the care I wanted to, I was burnt out following covid (my mum died), I have definaly save a fair few lifes in my clinical time, I loved my job and I was good at it (emergency department background). Reading the posts on MN has really upset me recently, the disrespect, dislike and darn right hatred for healthcare professionals really worries me. My friends are on their knees and this abuse doesn't help, people are getting crap care because there is no staff and this awful attitude is just adding fuel to the fire. I'm really worried about you, me and our families future healthcare.

OP posts:
bloodyplanes · 04/09/2022 13:11

@CinnamonJellyBeans i never once suggested gatekeeping NHS services against poor people Confused

CinnamonJellyBeans · 04/09/2022 13:13

He could no longer walk was riddled with cancer in his bones and was feeling very low even before his leg snapped as there was no bone left.

He would have hated the next stop planned for him = nursing home

I know someone who works in an old people's home. It's disgusting. Many of them sit in their room all day with no visitors, no books, no telly or radio. They just sit and wait to die. I feel most sorry for the ones who are still able to register what is happening to them.

CinnamonJellyBeans · 04/09/2022 13:42

@Topgub : Of course we cost the NHS most in our final year of life We're either in hospital or having expensive treatment, but this holds whether you're 60 or 100, so why not try to live a long life?

Topgub · 04/09/2022 13:44

@CinnamonJellyBeans

Because your argument was about cost not trying to live a long life.

I've no desire to live to 100.

None at all and that's before we factor in the real liklihood of immobility and dementia

CinnamonJellyBeans · 04/09/2022 13:47

You can reduce the risk for immobility and dementia by better lifestyle choices.

Topgub · 04/09/2022 14:06

@CinnamonJellyBeans

Not at 100

WhackingPhoenix · 04/09/2022 14:12

What a depressing thread. Some of the attitudes displayed here are the exact reasons I left acute nursing; I miss it so much but I couldn’t cope with the abuse any longer.

I’ve been punched, kicked, spat on, almost set on fire (and would have been had the wonderful security guard not knocked the already-lit lighter out of the patient’s hand before it touched me), had crockery, chairs and bins thrown at me, not to mention the verbal abuse I received on a daily basis.

I had a woman scream at me that I was a piece of shit because I hadn’t been back with her Gaviscon, when she knew the reason for that was that the patient two beds along from her had a cardiac arrest as I was walking to get the Gaviscon and unfortunately that was a priority. We tried to resuscitate the patient for 45 minutes, I felt her little ribs and sternum crack under my hands and it still wasn’t enough and she died. But you have to put your brave face back on and just get on with your job, only to be abused by the next person you meet.

One of the final straws for my decision to leave was having a shouting match with a consultant who would not recognise that our patient was actively dying and that a critical decision had to be made, I went to a different consultant who listened to me and helped me act on my concerns and the original consultant found me and shook his fists in my face for ‘disobeying’ him. The patient knew he was dying, as did his wife, and he wanted to go in peace, which I fully supported and could have facilitated. Instead, the original consultant then decided to take action and put the patient on CPAP, who then had a seizure, bit through his tongue and died a horrible death suffocating on his own blood inside a CPAP machine, which will haunt me forever. His wife was the most wonderful woman, she gave me the biggest cuddle when I walked her out to meet the friend who was collecting her and thanked me for trying to give her husband some dignity.

I still keep the most beautifully written cards from patients and their families which I will always treasure, but it still isn’t enough to keep me in a job where I was suffering mentally due to the abuse and pressure I was under. I’m gutted because I know I was good at my job both clinically and because I always went the extra mile for my patients, but I know I might have lost that if I’d continued, and I am not alone because this is what is happening to nurses throughout the NHS. Most of the nurses I know who still work in acute care are in therapy and on antidepressants because of the job.

Please don’t blame us for the failings of the NHS because we really do give it our best, day in, day out.

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