To think that home schooling is a bit cult like?

[WobblyWellies]

This is purely anecdotal but based on a group of friends who are all home schooling now, it makes me feel like there is a cult like element to it. There's definitely a click amongst the mums. One of my friends in the group has changed quite a bit since she started home schooling. She's almost become a bit militant about the whole thing. She often posts things on social media about how terrible schools are for children and how home schooling is much better. I feel like she's stirring things up. I am in fact a teacher but I don't push school on people I meet or social media, it's totally individual choice how you want your child educated. I'm not sure if my friend is out to convert people.

However, I do see homeschooling as a privilege to a certain extent because it relies on a parent not working (or part time) and is self funded for the majority. My friend has a house with acres of land and woods, she does loads of outdoor learning with her kids which is great but I wouldn't say it's the norm to have that.

So this group of friends are very clicky over homeschooling and it feels like a them and us scenario now.

Aibu to say it's like a cult for some people?

I would love to see your stats about home schooled children doing better than state and privately educated children. This topic seems to come up regularly on mumsnet and the studies that I’ve seen shared do not support your claim.

Why do you fear your child having to compete with 30 other kids in a classroom? Did you have a bad school experience yourself?

I think the people who don’t have to HE because of SEN feel they have to defend their decisions so rhapsodise about HE being amazing and then sound a bit evangelical/cult-like.

Just for the purpose of letting people know, many areas now allow you to delay school for 1 year for Summerborn children (born April-Aug). So they get their full education, just starting the term after they turn 5, not 4.

Unfortunately some areas still make you fight for it but lots are very accepting. Stats do show Summerborns are at a disadvantage (obviously) so I can see why you felt hesitant sending them at the time.

I have 3 kids and couldn't home school, I wouldn't be giving them enough time and attention.

I also love working and having time for ME. So homeschooling wouldn't be in anyone's best interests in my family.

I can't imagine anything better than spending all my time with my children.

I’m not sure that’s ideal for your children though. They need their own space!

@Aretheyhavingalaugh How can you be so certain she’ll thrive? For me school is about far more than learning information. It’s about socialising with a wide range of children, not other home schooled children who are going to be similar to an extent. To relate to different adults and learn from them.

I also enjoy watching my children take part in whole school events and special days.

I find it interesting to know your views. There must be a good degree of self confidence to home school. I’m a teacher and I don’t think I’m always the best person to reach my children. My 6 year old has been incredibly inspired this year by her teacher who has a real flair for art, she wouldn’t have got that passion from me!

Perhaps your friends are drawn to home schooling because they would prefer their children to be taught by people who can spell?

@Aretheyhavingalaugh
There are no large formal studies of UK home education. So it is impossible to say whether home ed or schooled children in the UK perform better or have better outcomes.

Similar to the school myth that school is the only place where children can be socialised, there are a lot of myths in home education, too.

Credit to HEers. I just couldn't. I've supported my kids with some extra teaching and it tests my patience after more than an hour...

Would I consider HE? I guess only if the local schools were dreadful. I've found helping with some GCSEs and A levels fine but, even having done A level Maths for example, I'd struggle to teach it.

I also agree with the poster that said it takes ages. I sat down to look at a set poem with my son yesterday and there was a lot of preamble, both getting everything printed and ready, but also finding online resources to support it. Extrapolate that over a whole day and I'd be needing to do quite a lot of preparation to make sure work was covered as efficiently as possible.

The volume of subject information and support online is great, but it is also time-consuming sifting through it to find the best one. I'd also worry about marking GCSE and A level work, even having looked at the mark schemes.

Presumably HEers use specialist tutors for the more advanced work? Are there HE specific ones or do you have to work outside school hours as most are FT teachers?

I like the variety of school, particularly learning to interact with teachers and other pupils respectfully. I'm also a big fan of school sport. My kids love sport and have at least one or two sports sessions every day plus one or two fixtures a week. That's hard to replicate even with club sport.

Do you worry that they'll miss out on the social side of school?

You do realise not all children are the same and that not all children flourish or even benefit from being in a school environment, right?

The "social side of school" was utter hell for me.

Why are you assuming that home-schooling means limited interaction with other children compared to normal school?

Also OP, you're a teacher but spell clique as click?

I've been trying really hard to ignore this. Glad it's not just me...

Why are you assuming that home-schooling means limited interaction with other children compared to normal school?

Lots of children don't enjoy school.

YANBU - I agree OP people I know who homeschool are very evangelical and righteous!!
It’s a really bizarre choice to remove children from school, effectively cutting them off from society. School is more than just traditional education, is about socialising and being exposed to lots of different characters and personalities through peer and teacher engagement, learning about structure rules and conformity. How can these parents impart GCSE level information onto their kids, surely it’s all YouTube and study guides, at secondary school pupils have 10+ teachers for all their subjects plus access to all the associated specialist learning facilities and equipment (Science, technology topics etc).
I wonder how these kids will fare in the real world after living in a cult like bubble for their whole childhood!!!

I agree. The ones I know are already very religious, and home schooling is a part of that . They don't want their kids to be taught anything against their own beliefs. Their kids seem to be very indoctrinated, like they are from another planet to be honest. I feel sorry for them, they won't be able to think outside their very closed-minded box.

I feel sorry for them, they won't be able to think outside their very closed-minded box.

This is such an ironic statement on a thread that is absolutely full of people who have clearly demonstrated they're unable to think outside the box that is state education

Many of us are perfectly capable of reading long posts.

This is so funny... Do you know many homeschoolers?

I know three, all previously had their DC in school but they didn't get on for whatever reason, they're all really cool, lovely, friendly and creative people. Their kids have an amazing time.

I have found some parents who homeschool from day one (or plan to) to be a bit superior about it.

The reason I think it can seem a bit cultish / evangelical is that they are going against the norm, so they have to reassure themselves constantly that they are making the right choice while society tells them they're wrong.

I’m not sure a formal study would give the true picture anyway, as it’s like the arguement that la’s always use when trying to argue against specialist that children perform better in mainstream schools than specialist schools! Of course they do as mainstream school are full of kids without Sen so statistically their results will obviously look better. Home Ed won’t be the same mix of kids as a mainstream so won’t be comparable, needs to be looked at on an individual basis which is impossible.

I found the same. I homeschooled for specific reasons and found the meet ups for home schooled kids most bizarre. Full of very privileged women who thought their lifestyles were normal but also who had odd ideas over what was important eg removing kids from school to enable them to practice the violin more? So they don't have to mix with the wrong families? Because the school bus was too early? To enable more holidays? But mostly because the school curriculum wasn't traditional enough! They were teaching the kids Latin whereas mine were learning Chinese.

Mine went back into the school system 6 months later once we had a permanent address

Isn’t state education now becoming just teaching to the test and is gradually losing any element of thinking outside the box if not lost already

I knew 3 Mormon home educating families.
The only vibes they gave off were patience.

However, since I only knew 3 of them (all of them American) and I also don't know any non-home-educating Mormons, it's hardly a basis for generalising an entire religion.

No

In the UK:
home schooling is when a child is registered at a school but receives education at home (by a teacher)
home education the child is not registered at school but is being educated "otherwise" (The Education Act states that a child has to be educated at school or otherwise)

No it isn’t. Particularly in primary schools. Yes SATs can be the be all and end all in some schools but even there they only really affect year 6. Most year 2s don’t even know they’ve done them.

You are going to meet some people that do it differently to how you would.

We tried Latin. We lasted approximately 3 weeks😂. We lasted a bit longer at Mandarin, though. None of mine learned the violin (although the youngest now wants to) and it certainly wouldn't be a reason not to go to school, for most.

Classical education is what is sometimes taught in some public schools. Nobody is disparaging about that, though, oddly. Perhaps it's fine if you pay several thousand pounds for it?

Some home ed meet ups are strange though. It does take a bit of time to find your feet. So when you find your "crowd" may be it does seem a bit cliquey to others.
Also some are just not a good fit for your children. We stopped going to one that was held in an echoey hall.
We also didn't go to overly religious ones.

Home ed as a reason not to mix with certain others might be a reason, particularly if there has been bullying or their closest schools have a bad reputation.
How is this much different from school parents preferring to send their children to the nice middle class school rather than the one who's catchment area includes the large council/social housing estate, though?

Missing the school run and having term-time holidays were definitely bonuses, though. Again, not necessarily reasons on their own but many home educators will mention them as a "perk."