Had my Limit on the Weird Neighbours

[User57327259]

I have had a couple of Threads on here about the issues I have with some neighbours. On both threads over 80% said I was not being unreasonable. They have really annoyed me with their carry on now. I am trying to think of a way of getting an end to this carry.
I have spoken to Police and Social Work. I am disabled and as such that is a Protected Characteristic. It is supposedly illegal to treat me badly. This is also a recorded diary of the conduct by official parties. The Management Company are also aware.
The last suggestion from the Police was that I should tell my relatives. At first I thought this was not an idea to be considered but as this constant harassment continues I am reconsidering that option. I will not be hanging around if that is the only viable option
I think that there is possibility that this is a mental health issue causing their conduct however that may be me being too kind to bad people. They might be just nasty all the way through. I am now thinking of contacting the local GP Surgeries to try to have them investigate. I am very worried and scared living with the uncertainty of what they are going to do next.
I feel that I am about to be unable to stay in my house safely and without fear. They are totally irrational.
Would writing to the GP be a good option ?

I do not know exactly how many times they have spoken to me. I know that when I first came they were friendly, maybe too friendly to get knowledge of my life, and now they are very difficult.
Ignore all early chats. Since the argument about the cupboards (2 months ago), how many times have these neighbours spoken to you?

Its very confusing

The OP clearly has some MH issues herself. It won't become any clearer and she's not listening to anyone on here, so it's pointless engaging.

@MRexI discarded the thoughts of contacting a GP on the first page. Can we now stop talking about that.
Here are the details of my week.
In the last week I have had the door slamming accusation. She said she knew because she watches my coming and going!
I have had a visitor who may have been excessive on the buzzer (not my fault) and out came the female of the pair about to start when she saw two people standing there, me and the visitor.
Today we are off again on a completely different subject. I am now taking photos! I was dealing with a broken car, there will be records of when I contacted road rescue for help there are messages, emails and phone calls all going on at that time. When road rescue arrived the technician said why is that car parked right up against yours.
In the last week I did not leave the flat on four of these days.
This is no life at all

@Puffalicious Are you qualified to say I have mental health problems? Will I tell my GP that this is your opinion. I am remarkably sane given the situations I have been involved in. This was supposed to be a safe place! Jezzo!

If it continues op tell them to stop and if not you’ll have no option but to consider it harassment, tbey have no right to monitor your comings and goings, no right to harass visitors or to block your car in or decide who parks where.

So your neighbour threatened to dump wood - the wood that was left in a communal area? And now you Hebe a broken down car parked / left in a communal area too?

But my main question is, what di you think your family would do if you told them? You do make it sound like they're a bunch of gangsters who could inflict untold harm...

*have

@WeAreAllLionesses I do not want to go back but the wood was out for council uplift. If the area is communal I have a share in that area too.
Do you think I should not park my car in the car parking area for the block that I live in?
My family got an awful fright when I was in the accident and the resulting other physical situations connected to that. They became really protective. They can shout I do not. The neighbours would not consider them as much of a wimp as I am

Car is all fixed now Was only broken for less than an hour

Excuse me OP, I'm not the only one to suggest you have MH problems! Your incoherent ramblings and refusal to accept anything anyone says give me little else to conclude. That and the thought that you contact a GP because you think they have MH problems. Are you qualified to diagnose then?

The bottom line is that you have difficult neighbours. You've had plenty of advice. Suck it up, ignore and get on with your life, stop making it a huge drama.

I’m not quite sure at this stage what you want anyone to do? Short of order a very targeted airstrike on your neighbours?

If you’re that stressed maybe talk to your family or GP instead of writing 3 yards of text on here. Maybe use the threads as a diary to get your thoughts clear.

Good luck!

I doubt if anyone could do anything with people who are so difficult.
I have been having CBT Therapy during all of this and my scores are noted. Every time they start things become less happy for me. I think this is quite natural and to be expected.

Maybe there is nothing for it but to move away. I will never chose to live in a communal situation again. It has been dreadful.
I am curious as to why people would spend their days trying to be so difficult to others. It seems that many older people are like that for some reason

OP, you have now said several times that you have the means to move and that you don't intend to stay living 'in a small flat with weird neighbours'. OK, so that's fine, then, isn't it? Put the flat on the market tomorrow, move out, problem solved.

Still can't actually see anything in your descriptions of your neighbours' behaviour that indicates anything more than them being mildly twattish, though.

You may well have a share of the communal garden but so do they. What does your lease say about the storage of waste there? Probably that it is not permitted for any reason. This seems to have been the catalyst and from the previous thread you do seem unable to understand why your particular use of it was inappropriate and how that may have rubbed people up the wrong way. Now it has escalated I'd imagine you probably wish yourself that you had done things differently before. We have communal gardens where I live. I also have a share of them but not for storage of stuff that is waiting to be dumped. You can't allow people to bully you but I do think you've probably got off on a poor start and need to look at moving forward by ignoring any further contact but keeping a record of everything. It's possible if you hadn't stored waste there none of this would have happened. It's also possible they just would have found something else to cause trouble over.

Do you have resident meetings and what are the management company doing to help resolve this. If they are falsely accusing you of slamming the doors is there another door you can use. We lived in a block of flats where we asked residents and visitors to leave a note of their car reg numbers on a pinboard as cheeky feckers were parking in our carparking area for free. We were not allowed to store anything in any communal areas without permission from the management committee and it would only be for a very short time. We would have had to store old kitchen cabinets inside or in our garage.

"Today we are off again on a completely different subject. I am now taking photos!"

Of what? And why?

@10HailMarys I have made moves towards moving but these thing do not happen overnight.
@LuckyLil I have been here nearly 3 years. At first it was friendly sitting out in nice weather. There was a party for an elderly resident. I was invited, even though I was new but they were not. If I did something wrong the right way to deal with that would be to speak to me in a normal voice and tell me what I did wrong. Threatening me is not going to have good results. I think this was just a matter of time. Others in the area have told me of similar conduct. I just want to live my life. I got told to move up in the parking places, I was parked in the space provided but they are outraged that not all the parking spaces are not the same size. This is a matter for the building company not me. They seem to be just like this constantly I seem to be the current target
@HappyHamsters there are no residents meetings. They like to run the place without anyone else having a say. They would not be at all please if anything went to a vote and the vote went against them. There are comments from the Management company about storing things in an internal area but not about outside areas. Guess who is storing things in that area. No prizes for the answer and it is not me
@NewBootsAndRanty I was accused that I was taking photos of their car, but she also said that she had photos of my car. Their car was parked so close to mine that I could not enter the car. None of the accusations are really happening. They are just been difficult

There must be a management company that can deal with this, is it a freehold or leasehold building.

OP I think this is a situation where there is probably some wrongs on both sides. It might have been a good idea to mention to the neighbours that you were having some work done so there might
be some mess for a short time but you would arrange clearance as quickly as possible. Equally, they could have been a but more measured when the had concerns about the waste. Unfortunately there are some people who make it their business to run other people’s lives wherever you go. What you can do is try and change your reaction to it. By having CBT you have clearly made a start.
Incidentally I live in what sounds like a similar building to yours and moved in two years ago. About six months ago my downstairs neighbour had words with me claiming she could hear footsteps (I pretty much always wear trainers or go barefoot at home) and cupboards banging. This did worry me for a while - I had visions of a vendetta! - but it’s been fine since.

Ok So what this is getting to, is the longer list. What you need is to start keeping a detailed list - date, time, person, what was said / done, evidence (where you have call log, text message, letter). Earlier items like the cupboard just note as much as you can, but going forward you write down every comment. Take it to citizen's advice and ask them to help you to write a letter informing the neighbour that you consider it to be harassment and you require them to stop contacting you. Any further communication they have for you should come via a solicitor letter only. Keep a copy of the letter, so when they contact you again take your list, letter and next contact proof to the police. The police can then explain harassment and consequences, which should stop them.
Good luck.

@MRex I think now you are seeing this as it is. Thank you. I have used the list about to try to create a log of what has happened. I have put more detail in like names etc which I did not do here. I think keeping a log would maybe get more action against this harassment because that it how I see it now. Unfortunately police are dealing with it incident by incident and not joining up the whole situation. I will be talking to people today about this. It is not comfortable to live in such close proximity to people who behave like this.

We've all struggled a bit to see through what you're saying because you keep reverting to the first incident. A written list that you can show police is useful, then make site you talk through each item chronologically. As I said though, citizens advice will be of most use initially, because you need to formally tell the neighbours that you view their behaviour as harassment. Once that's done, they can't argue they had no idea and were just chatting, they know you are clearly asking them to stop talking to you.

A GP cannot investigate a patient on your say so.
A GP cannot reveal any medical information to you.
You GP is not a mediator in an argument between neighbours.

You can engage a solicitor to send a cease and desist letter.
You can examine your tenancy agreement. There are usually clauses against anti social behaviour and harassing neighbours. Bring this to the attention of the management company. Engage your MP and local councillor.

OP, regarding the car parking space, do you have a designated space for your flat only? Or is it a space for each flat and whoever gets there first gets the best spot.
If it’s the former then tell anyone parked in your designated space to please move thier car.
If it’s the latter park wherever you can, however, if anyone blocks you in or parks so close it prevents you from opening the car door then ask them to move, and keep ringing their door bell until they answer o, if possible park at the end of the parking area if there’s an open space and park so that your drivers door is parallel to the open space.
Dont stop living your life, if the wife berates you just carry on walking. Don’t engage with them.