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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to give table to women with pushchairs?

128 replies

inghp · 27/08/2022 13:10

Me and my boyfriend were in a Wetherspoons last week.
We had a booth and our food had arrived and we had a drink.
It was quite busy downstairs and two women with pushchairs came in..they had 2 little girls who weren't in pushchairs but walking ahead.
They were told there were tables upstairs and there was a lift available.

So my boyfriend (as we were eating ) said shall we give them our table and we go upstairs
I said no don't be stupid
(Bars in mind we were mid way through food and had drinks)
He wanted us to pick up our plates and go upstairs for a table so they could have ours.

It turned into us arguing -with him saying if that was you with a pushchair you would hope someone would be kind to you.
I said not when they are half way through lunch I wouldn't.
Aibu ?

OP posts:
katkit · 27/08/2022 13:11

Yanbu

Quincythequince · 27/08/2022 13:12

Yanbu

Comedycook · 27/08/2022 13:13

No I wouldn't offer my table in this situation. A lift to go upstairs is fine. Offering is unnecessary

ForfuckssakeEXHstopbeingatwat · 27/08/2022 13:13

given that there was a lift and your food was on the table, no you needn't have moved. If you had just sat down and hadn't ordered to the table number even, then yes it might have been nice but again, as there was a lift its not really an issue.

SplashparkSummer · 27/08/2022 13:13

There was a lift so they were at no disadvantage. I'm sure if you'd offered they would have thought it very strange and declined.

HappyHamsters · 27/08/2022 13:15

Did they even ask if they could interrupt your meal so they th3y could have the downstairs. Yanbu.

TheTeddyBears · 27/08/2022 13:16

He is utterly ridiculous! I'd be mortified if someone tried to give me their table and move their meal and drinks all the way upstairs!

BeanieTeen · 27/08/2022 13:16

YANBU. It’s hardly a logistical hardship to get in a lift with a pushchair.
I hope you’re other half isn’t expecting others to make weird concessions like this for him in the future when he’s the one with a pushchair - he’ll be bitterly disappointed 😂

BaronessBomburst · 27/08/2022 13:18

Your boyfriend was being weird.

HangOnToYourself · 27/08/2022 13:18

If I was the woman with the pushchair and someone picked up their plate to carry upstairs I'd be absolutely mortified

Original poster
inghp · 27/08/2022 13:19

He tries to hard to do the "nice" thing all the time.
He's moved plane seats after we had paid for them for people who hadn't booked.
The list is endless

OP posts:
SizzlerFizzler · 27/08/2022 13:21

Your boyfriend has a bad case of wanting to be liked. I'm sure he's a nice guy, and sounds very helpful, but it's a bit much.

SpinningFloppa · 27/08/2022 13:21

How odd, no I wouldn’t have done that 😕

HangOnToYourself · 27/08/2022 13:23

inghp · 27/08/2022 13:19

He tries to hard to do the "nice" thing all the time.
He's moved plane seats after we had paid for them for people who hadn't booked.
The list is endless

But he is inconveniencing you for the comfort of complete strangers, that's not really nice in my opinion

J0y · 27/08/2022 13:24

half way through your lunch? no.

J0y · 27/08/2022 13:25

inghp · 27/08/2022 13:19

He tries to hard to do the "nice" thing all the time.
He's moved plane seats after we had paid for them for people who hadn't booked.
The list is endless

Ah so he's a people pleaser who is not invested in to pleasing YOU.
This guy is my mother.

Tiani4 · 27/08/2022 13:25

Your bf puts other people before your comfort. He can do what he likes but he can't volunteer you
Ridiculous idea to move whilst you're middle of eating your food sat at a table!! That's bizarre & unnecessary. It doesn't sound like the women asked you. They'd have been CF if they had !

If your bf offered that to me I would say "thanks but no, you enjoy your meal" and I'd be embarrassed

chillipenguin · 27/08/2022 13:26

ForfuckssakeEXHstopbeingatwat · 27/08/2022 13:13

given that there was a lift and your food was on the table, no you needn't have moved. If you had just sat down and hadn't ordered to the table number even, then yes it might have been nice but again, as there was a lift its not really an issue.

This

Sillystripytail · 27/08/2022 13:26

YANBU and this is the kind of thing my husband does. It's infuriating. Seems kind on the surface to think of others but why do they come before you? You were literally eating FGS.

Tiani4 · 27/08/2022 13:26

I forgot to say he's not nice
He doesn't care about your feelings or comfort at all
I can't believe he argued with you!

Do you want the rest of your life being out last to random strangers by your bf?
I'd wonder who I was dating..,

chillipenguin · 27/08/2022 13:27

inghp · 27/08/2022 13:19

He tries to hard to do the "nice" thing all the time.
He's moved plane seats after we had paid for them for people who hadn't booked.
The list is endless

That's fine though as long as you still end up together? Maybe next time don't bother paying?

Original poster
inghp · 27/08/2022 13:29

@chillipenguin we didn't ,he gave his middle seat to a lady so she could be next to her daughter (16 years old ) and left me by the window and he went the seat behind
So frustrating

OP posts:
Trinity65 · 27/08/2022 13:30

YANBU in these circumstances OP

GabriellaMontez · 27/08/2022 13:31

You're at the bottom of his list, of people to be nice to.

Point that out to him. If he can't recognise that and change it, reconsider if you want to always be with someone who puts you last.

chillipenguin · 27/08/2022 13:33

inghp · 27/08/2022 13:29

@chillipenguin we didn't ,he gave his middle seat to a lady so she could be next to her daughter (16 years old ) and left me by the window and he went the seat behind
So frustrating

Then he should reimburse you the seat booking fee