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AIBU?

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Original poster

The "anything is possible" brigade

254 replies

Arkarians · 27/08/2022 09:24

Anything is possible with enough hard work! Does anyone else find this phrase annoying as fuck?

You can become a billionaire like Elon Musk apparently, if you just simply work as hard as him.

Anyones child can excel in school, get top marks on all of their GCSEs and get into Oxbridge, if they bothered to work hard enough.

Anyone can achieve a high-flying career as a lawyer or doctor, if they just work hard enough.

The implication is that people who aren't massively successful lawyers, doctors, business owners, CEOs, etc are lazy fucks who couldn't be bothered to put the effort in? Not to mention how your background and/or current circumstances are a massive factor in success too.

Surely it doesn't matter how 'hard' you work, you could work 12 hours a day until the day you die and still never achieve Elon Musk level success. If you don't have the creativity, the right ideas, the luck and all the physical capacities for it, it will never happen.

Is there something Un-PC about acknowledging that people have different abilities, circumstances, levels of intelligence, etc, and not everyone is built for huge success?

OP posts:
MeanMrMustardSeed · 27/08/2022 09:27

YANBU. I was talking about this the other day with DH.
The really terrible consequence of this sort of thinking is that it devalues those who are brilliant at vocational / more practical jobs.

PurpleDaisies · 27/08/2022 09:28

YANBU at all.

MrsRobinsonsHandprints · 27/08/2022 09:29

Yanbu.

And all the posts saying people should just upskill, people are needed to do all the less well paid jobs, and in fact it is those people that are doing these jobs that allow the better paid to have their lifestyle.

AnnaFri · 27/08/2022 09:30

YANBU

Intelligence plays a large part in success, and a whole lot of luck

Luck people can't bank on and intelligence is the elephant in the room no one wants to address (as it's a bit mean)

Also most don't understand the comparisons they're making

Elon musk for example isn't some genius, he used daddy's money to buy a company where the building blocks were already in place. Then hired people far more intelligent than he was to build Tesla

Antarcticant · 27/08/2022 09:31

What's always ignored is that someone has to do the minimum wage jobs. In the unrealistic scenario that everyone went on courses to gain qualifications and 'better themselves' it would simply raise the bar all round.

What we need is fair pay for all workers.

Singleandproud · 27/08/2022 09:31

People always use Elon Musk as some sort of realistic aspirational model. I don't think alot of people realize how privileged Elon Musk was growing up and think he's some sort of rags to riches genius when his mum was a supermodel and dad owned Emerald mines in South Africa with some very shady practices. I think he was momentarily cut off after a disagreement with dad but that doesn't cancel out the years of privilege before.

If you work hard you'll achieve more than sat around doing nothing and that's true for everyone but there's also a skill in balancing life and work and not burning out by 28. I wouldnt want a very highly responsibility, time sucking career. I want something I can grow in for job satisfaction but can leave at the end of the day and have enough money to pay my bills. I live to fit my means instead of always chasing the bigger and better car/house/holiday.

Smogtopia · 27/08/2022 09:35

I 100% agree with you.

What I will say in my 20 year experience of working in the corporate office type roles including stints in management - I can count almost 10/15 people who I've ever worked with who worked to their true potential and really 'worked hard' That doesn't mean the cleaner could have become to CEO but it does mean people could have been in much different circumstances if they'd have really applied themselves

Sunnyqueen · 27/08/2022 09:35

Yanbu. I always find its the people who bleat the loudest 'I work hard for my money!' are the ones who actually sit on their arse on a laptop Monday to Friday 9-5 on a fat corporate wage. I just think really, you really believe you work harder than a minimum wage carer on a dementia ward working 100 hours a week?? And the fact they haven't been able to buy their own home like you is because they don't work as hard as you? Come the fuck on now.

carefullycourageous · 27/08/2022 09:37

Yanbu. Humans are weird, they like to believe fairy stories are real. We all do it to some extent.

AnnaFri · 27/08/2022 09:40

Sunnyqueen · 27/08/2022 09:35

Yanbu. I always find its the people who bleat the loudest 'I work hard for my money!' are the ones who actually sit on their arse on a laptop Monday to Friday 9-5 on a fat corporate wage. I just think really, you really believe you work harder than a minimum wage carer on a dementia ward working 100 hours a week?? And the fact they haven't been able to buy their own home like you is because they don't work as hard as you? Come the fuck on now.

See it's comments like this that get backs up

Sitting on your arse isn't fair considering they might be doing a very mentally challenging role

I sit on my arse all day but work damn hard

Not physically hard but I'd take a menial job (on my current wage) over one that's stressful any day

Alas you don't get paid the big bucks to mop floors but it's silly to think office based roles aren't hard work compared to minimum wage ones

KimberleyClark · 27/08/2022 09:41

AnnaFri · 27/08/2022 09:30

YANBU

Intelligence plays a large part in success, and a whole lot of luck

Luck people can't bank on and intelligence is the elephant in the room no one wants to address (as it's a bit mean)

Also most don't understand the comparisons they're making

Elon musk for example isn't some genius, he used daddy's money to buy a company where the building blocks were already in place. Then hired people far more intelligent than he was to build Tesla

This.

So much is down to luck. You can be born with a good brain - luck - but you also need to be born with the personality traits to be successful - drive, ambition, organisation etc, also luck.

BuenoSucia · 27/08/2022 09:42

😂 my 10 year old berated me last week for pretty much the same. My IQ is higher than EM’s - ergo, I should be a billionaire.

maybe I could’ve done something wonderful had I been cushioned by millions and had someone else (a team of) to do all the boring shite for me.

like hunt through the aforementioned 10 year old’s floordrobe in the hunt for dirty washing.

Sunnyqueen · 27/08/2022 09:43

AnnaFri · 27/08/2022 09:40

See it's comments like this that get backs up

Sitting on your arse isn't fair considering they might be doing a very mentally challenging role

I sit on my arse all day but work damn hard

Not physically hard but I'd take a menial job (on my current wage) over one that's stressful any day

Alas you don't get paid the big bucks to mop floors but it's silly to think office based roles aren't hard work compared to minimum wage ones

Show quote history

Ah yes the old 'mentally challenging' argument, yeah I've had these roles. Still doesn't compare to a simutaneously mentally and physically challenging role - like dementia ward example for much longer hours daily and weekly.

lightand · 27/08/2022 09:43

YANBU

Mosaic123 · 27/08/2022 09:44

I definitely agree with you.

I might have wanted to become a ballet dancer but if I am the wrong height and build and too clumsy it can't possibly happen. Even if I practice 10 hours a day.

Similarly I might want to be an accountant but would not the exams

It is not, unfortunately, simply just a case of keeping your dream going and putting everything into it to achieve your ambition.

Your ambition may not be possible in spite of tons of hard work.

JudgeRindersMinder · 27/08/2022 09:44

Let’s not forget “the harder I work the luckier I get” crew.

Gingernaut · 27/08/2022 09:45

YANBU

KangarooKenny · 27/08/2022 09:46

I didn’t like it many years ago when we were told that all school leavers should go to Uni. No, not everyone is cut out for it.

Katsufatsu · 27/08/2022 09:47

AnnaFri · 27/08/2022 09:30

YANBU

Intelligence plays a large part in success, and a whole lot of luck

Luck people can't bank on and intelligence is the elephant in the room no one wants to address (as it's a bit mean)

Also most don't understand the comparisons they're making

Elon musk for example isn't some genius, he used daddy's money to buy a company where the building blocks were already in place. Then hired people far more intelligent than he was to build Tesla

I don't fully understand what you've written here but success is definitely not dependant on intelligence, more likely a character trait like ruthlessness.

WishDragon · 27/08/2022 09:47

Anything is possible. If your parents are loaded or have all the connections you need to get ahead. That’s why nepotism is alive and well.

It’s the reason all celebrity children are ‘aspiring’ models/DJs/actors/chefs/photographers.

sst1234 · 27/08/2022 09:47

Hard work is always misrepresented as you are doing. Hard work is not about graft. It’s about taking risks. About trying new things, stepping outside of your comfort zone. Very small, mundane things.

Packing up and moving to a new city for an opportunity (although that’s not a small thing). Taking a training course as work even though it may be an inconvenience to your working hours or has no obvious benefit. Taking a job you have no experience in or may find difficult. Some other networking opportunity where you meet someone who helps you in some way. Going back to school as an adult. Starting a small business o getting a side hustle.

Hard work is about stepping out of your lane.

UWhatNow · 27/08/2022 09:49

It’s privilege talking.

My life is being surrounded by hard working, low earning, honest working class people. It absolutely makes me feel murderous when I hear arseholes who’ve had generations of privilege say things like ‘… because we’ve worked hard we are able to afford private education and a million pound house etc…’

As if being rich were as simple as ‘working hard’. Fuck off.

PlattyJubes · 27/08/2022 09:52

YANBU at all. And it's easy to 'step out of your lane' if you have a supportive family, or are physically and mentally healthy. So many people have zero control over the cards they are dealt in life. I don't view someone like Elon Musk as much of a role model either.

BeautifulWar · 27/08/2022 09:52

Yep, totally agree. This sort of thinking will lead to a lot of frustration, disappointment and even feelings of inadequacy.

I could have done/been 'more' if you're measuring success in terms of job and money. I sometimes look up my old uni cohort and am impressed by what they've achieved, but that's just not me.is

There's a balance to be struck between striving and understanding yourself.

SquirrelSoShiny · 27/08/2022 09:53

Antarcticant · 27/08/2022 09:31

What's always ignored is that someone has to do the minimum wage jobs. In the unrealistic scenario that everyone went on courses to gain qualifications and 'better themselves' it would simply raise the bar all round.

What we need is fair pay for all workers.

100% this. We need a culture where people are paid a living wage to do a good job and yes, by all means pay some people more to recognise specialist training etc but we don't need a society where footballers and CEOs earn millions and care workers earn very little.

Instead we need a society that addresses inequalities so every child gets the chance to have a good life and good future regardless of how they are raised. And that whatever work they do, they will be paid and valued.

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