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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To send my neighbour's parcel back and not give to them

153 replies

mummy203 · 26/08/2022 15:51

So I’ve just had a parcel delivered from justfab. My neighbours name but my address and postcode. They’ve used the second line of the address to say “deliver to (their door number) it looks like they deliberately had it ordered to my number. Why would anyone do that?

This neighbour has lived near me for three years. All through lock downs. They’ve made it very clear they didn’t want to be neighbourly for example I wave if we pass each other etc. They make eye contact but ignore me. I pull over so we pass each other on the small road. They refuse to. Even if it means me reversing 20meters and they would have to reverse a couple of feet.

Aibu to just send it back to justfab?

OP posts:
celticprincess · 29/08/2022 08:07

I have an issue with ordering online take always. One of the apps defaults my postcode to the next street and not mine (we have the same postcode, old terraced houses that have the back of one street parallel to the back of another). So I end up ordering to the wrong street with a note in the delivery to be delivered to my actual address.

J0y · 29/08/2022 08:14

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Yes, so much thought given to something that would be a 3 second decision for Mr. Id justleave it on their doorstep, perhaps with a note to say here you go please don't use my address though.

J0y · 29/08/2022 08:14

For me. Not for Mr!

abs12 · 29/08/2022 08:36

Can you join up to Just Fab and put in your address? Then see if you're recognised as a new customer....

YenneferOfVengabus · 29/08/2022 08:42

Maybe using your address to get a new member offer, if they've already had it once?

Libertyqueen · 29/08/2022 08:43

I would only do that if I hated the person concerned not just because they weren’t a friend. Seems wildly petty. You’d have to go to so much effort to be a dick.

dianthus101 · 29/08/2022 08:54

FFS. You're being ridiculously mean and petty as are many of the other posters on this thread. Anyone who would have thought your neighbour had killed your cat rather than just not made eye contact. Just give them the parcel.

FrecklesMalone · 29/08/2022 08:57

Pu4o8 · 26/08/2022 16:53

Theres a group of neighbours I ignore. For over a year I gave clear singles I didn’t want to chat (e.g breezy hello but walking on if they tried to engage me). Despite this, every time they try and make inane small talk. I find their behaviour to be really rude, so I ignore them now. I also refuse to take any parcels and my heart sinks when somethings dropped off at one of their houses as I know they’ll try and chat.

They might be relieved if you send it back and refuse to take any future parcels.

You sound lovely 😜

TheLassWiADelicateAir · 29/08/2022 08:58

girlmom21 · 26/08/2022 16:52

Her address might not have come up in the drop down when she was selecting the delivery destination.

Don't accept parcels that aren't addressed to you if you don't want to give them to your neighbour.

You can an address manually.

Didsomeonesaydogs · 29/08/2022 09:00

baffledcoconut · 26/08/2022 19:04

Send it back. We’ve got some dickish neighbours who’ve pissed off every single other house in our little area. There is something peculiar to all the houses here that if you know about is VERY useful and makes life so much easier.

No one has told them. Ever. It’s an unwritten rule to never mention it amongst the whole area 😬

Tell us more…

christmasgeek · 29/08/2022 09:01

Just drop them a breezy note saying something like 'Hi XYZ, looks like something has gone wrong with your address on this order, I'd maybe get in touch and get if changed before your next delivery. Feel free to pop round to collect it this week, or I'll just return it'

They'll know you know what they did.
You'll know they know you know.
They'll know you know they know you know.

And when they collect I'm sure you will be able to tell for definite if they meant to do it or not.

SpinCityBlues · 29/08/2022 09:01

It’s the refusal to reverse her car, ever, that would make me already think she’s out of order. If you live in a road like this (I do) you really have to take turns being the one to reverse up, for harmonious neighbourly relations.

You can’t have harmony around one person’s convenience. The ‘good neighbours’ thing extends to just a bit beyond packages.

megletthesecond · 29/08/2022 09:02

I'd assume they'd messed up the drop down address option and give them the parcel.
If it happened more fhan once I'd get pissed off with it. I hate my neighbours by the way.

PuppyMonkey · 29/08/2022 09:05

Theres a group of neighbours I ignore. For over a year I gave clear singles I didn’t want to chat (e.g breezy hello but walking on if they tried to engage me). Despite this, every time they try and make inane small talk. I find their behaviour to be really rude, so I ignore them now. I also refuse to take any parcels and my heart sinks when somethings dropped off at one of their houses as I know they’ll try and chat.

They might be relieved if you send it back and refuse to take any future parcels.

Imagine how devastated these neighbours must be at missing out on getting to know you.Grin

limitedperiodonly · 29/08/2022 09:13

Have you opened it? It might be worth keeping.

Wonnle · 29/08/2022 09:15

Another , or should that be yet another
" I can't make decisions myself so I have to ask on MN what to do ! " thread

BuildersTeaMaker · 29/08/2022 09:21

Smartiepants79 · 26/08/2022 16:07

Just give it to them and tell them clearly that you won’t be taking in any more.
surely it is actually more hassle it return the parcel than to hand it to the person who only lives next door.
I struggle to understand the angst over taking in the odd parcel for someone who lives next door!

I think the point is that they have used her address . Using someone else’s address without their permission is identity fraud.

if she does nothing, and doesn’t send clear signal that this is not ok, god knows what they might then start to use it for- credit cards? She could end up with debt collectors on her doorstep, poor credit ratings etc. yes, they’d all be solvable with proof etc but the stress it would cause is entirely a valid able.

nottodaytomorrow · 29/08/2022 09:26

Just leave it on their doorstep.. my guess is they didn't want this to happen initially so gave your address knowing you would take it in ?!

CookieCoo · 29/08/2022 09:27

My neighbour had a bloody hoover delivered when they were at work. Presumably knowing I’d end up with the box as I was on mat leave. It stayed in my small hallway for over 2 weeks for the lazy bugger to come and collect it!! With hindsight I should have said no, as the box was so big

Beautiful3 · 29/08/2022 09:28

I'd just take it round there, and ask them politely not to use my address in future. If you really dislike them that much, then return it ASAP before they come knocking for it.

wellobviouslyyoucan · 29/08/2022 09:31

Send it back and write on the package "not at this address. Return to sender"?"

PuzzledObserver · 29/08/2022 09:31

The new account discount thing is interesting….

We had a parcel arrive a few weeks ago - a name we didn’t recognise, our address. It’s a new build, so no chance of it being a previous occupant. We tried a couple of obvious possibilities (think transposed digits) and it wasn’t for them. So we marked it “Unknown at this address - return to sender” and put it back in the post.

(This is Royal Mail’s advice, btw - though obviously not the same if it’s come by courier)

Last week the postie asked us if we would take in a parcel for ndn, which we were happy to do. While she was filling in the card, we mentioned the other parcel and the name on it, and she said, “oh she’s at number xx - whoops, I shouldn’t have told you that.” xx is totally unlike our house number - none of the same digits at all.

Weird.

ChicCroissant · 29/08/2022 09:37

I think the poster that said that particular company has a big discount for first time buyers might have nailed it, they've used a different address for that! So I'd send it back.

We've had a parcel for a neighbour delivered to our address - they picked the wrong house number during the online order, realised and came straight round to tell us. Mistakes are fine, it's the deliberate use of your address which is annoying if it happens.

SquirrelSoShiny · 29/08/2022 09:41

They sound cheeky!

GeeksCanBeMumsToo · 29/08/2022 09:49

What about fronting them out? Knock on their door, and ask if they’ve used you’re address. Point out that if they can never reverse a few feet or manage a small wave that they’ll never receive any parcel if it has your address on it. Some people don’t realise how rude they are or do whatever they can get away with, and I find it best that be pointed out to them occasionally.