Would you donate your money if you’re classed as ‘rich’?

[Familylifeof3]

Hello,
A bit of background - I’m 33 and my husband is 34, we have 2 children who are 7 and 3.
We live around Cambridge and my husband commutes to London every day for work. He works every weekday and sometimes weekends too. He often flies over to America for work. He works extremely hard and does earn a lot of money.
We live in a relatively big house and have 2 lovely cars. I don’t have to ever worry about money and our eldest goes to private school (youngest will too when old enough).
We live a very lovely life and we are so grateful and take nothing for granted. I grew up with parents on benefits who struggled to afford bread most weeks and went to a pretty bad school in a pretty bad area so totally understand what it’s like to be in that position.
I work for the NHS (always have and always will) as I love caring for people.
Recently my husband got a promotion so we would love to donate some of that money to the NHS. Working through covid I am so aware of the struggles and want to support this the best I can.
I really feel they would benefit from a bit of money. And as I grew up with parents who struggled to afford the basics I really want to make sure people get the same care wether that’s privately or through NHS. I don’t feel money should make a difference in that.
Anyway, I told my sister and she looked horrified and said that we shouldn’t ‘waste’ money and should by a holiday house and yacht in America instead of donate.
I hate this idea and absolutely do not agree with that approach. She said we’re being selfish by not offering our children the best start in life!
Just to add my sister has always been a bit jealous of me and has always been funny about how we spend our money (wants to live through us sort of thing).
So do u agree with my sister? Or do u think I’m being totally reasonable in donating most of it?
TIA xx

I'd donate to a hospice - these are usually only partially funded by the NHS and rely on donations.

Honestly I'd be keeping it for house deposits for my kids if it's yacht/house amounts of money.

I think it’s important to model humility and generosity and empathy to your children. They already have privilege in terms of education and security. So many of my friends had parents like you and your husband and they are excellent caring people - mostly doctors. I am lucky to know them

The NHS is a bottomless pit and it isn’t as simple as a lack of money meaning it provides shit care. So no, I wouldn’t donate to the NHS if I actually wanted to do some good. Better to find a small charity or trust which you believe in and take an active interest in its running as well as donating money, so that you have an opportunity to oversee efficiency and strategic direction.

I can't imagine being in your position, but just wanted to say what a wonderful human being you are

YANBU to donate your own money how you wish. And how anyone can say donating to a charitable cause is 'wasteful' is beyond me

Do what you want, ignore your sister, its not her place

I'd be worried about where the money would go if I gave it to the NHS. I'd certainly donate directly to a smaller charity I trusted.

Donating to charity is absolutely not wasteful (or a less conventional charitable action like funding a bursary for an underprivileged kid, or paying for someone's operation privately) but if you want to give it to the NHS you might as well burn it, it will have about the same impact.

Everyone who can afford it should donate money to help people who are struggling. However there are many many charities, I’m not sure where your money could be effectively donated to in the nhs? The Macmillan foundation is another option, I’d look for a registered charity.

Lovely sentiment but I would definitely not donate it 'to the NHS' (how would you do this anyway?). I agree it would be wasting money because the NHS is a bottomless pit.

I would donate to a small charity where I know my money would do a lot of good

Thanks everyone for the replies so far. Sounds as though donating is in favour here (which is what I’d hoped for).
Maybe I’ll have a look at some smaller charities too and split the money between some smaller charities to do with the NHS rather than the NHS in general.
Touga - Thank you for understanding where I’m coming from. Hopefully my sister will start to mind her own business per se as she always has an opinion on our financial situation

No I’d spend that money on my children. No matter how much you give to the nhs even billions won’t make a difference so I wouldn’t give to such a huge place if it was a small area such as if your child had been poorly and you donated to the ward they stayed on so they can buy toys and games and books for the children on that ward but the nhs is huge and no amount of your money will help that.

I wouldn't necessarily donate to the nhs, but I would consider donating to smaller (health related) local charities that are close to your heart. So local hospices, or foodbanks, or a miscarriage support charity, or head injury charity, or age related charity, concerts for carers, etc.

Spend a bit of time figuring out which small local charities make a massively beneficial impact on the health/wellbeing of those in your community which you find find an absolute joy to support.

I don't know that I'd donate to the NHS, you'd probably know better than me, but it feels like that money would be lost in a bottomless pit and not male a difference, but yes, I'd definitely find some way to use the money for good.

Like other posters I wouldn't give it to the NHS but would give it to smaller, independent charities, donate to food banks and homeless shelters etc x really hope I will be in a position to do this one day

That's lovely of you OP!

I'd echo what others have said - a hospice or trust or similar. Not the NHS itself, you already pay into that through your taxes and your existing work.

I agree with the previous advice. Don't donate to the NHS; donate to one of the charities that picks up the pieces from the NHS's failings. Plenty of different charities to choose from, depending on what means the most to you.

What a kind person you are

if I had lots of money I would certainly donate a fair bit.

i wouldn’t send directly for nhs though- I’d donate to a small charity where my money would make a real difference. A hospice is a good idea.

that said my parents once made a sizeable donation to a particular ward at a hospital that saved my dad’s life. Better than just sending to the “nhs” where you may never know if your money came to good use.

ouch321 - no I am obviously aware that my sisters opinion is ridiculous and that my children are extremely lucky (something which we really try to instil in them, without making them snobbery iykwim).
We just want our money to go to a good cause and help people who are less fortunate or in need of help. xx

Yep

DH and i live in a v well off area and lots of friends on very high incomes.

We've all said for a while that we think the current government really don't have their finger on the pulse, as most well off people we know openly think they aren't being taxed enough.

The vibe is that we can all see the damage inequality is doing. We need teachers, nurses, bus drivers, nursery nurses, midwives, firemen, retail staff, delivery workers, fruit pickers as much as the next person and understand that the current economic model isnt remuneration those people enough.

I used to work for the NHS and would NOT donate to it. I'd look at local (or national) charities who support ill or disabled people.

What your dsis means is she wants to use your holiday home and yacht..
What about a charity that supports charities that help families of patients? Recently I stayed him with teen dd. Luckily they had some toiletries etc. Imagine if they had a charity donated pack to hand out to teens? That would be amazing.

Not the NHS itself, you already pay into that through your taxes and your existing work.

The point being it is not funded well enough to meet need, and the answer is for those of us who've done well out of the last few years to "pay it forward".

I think you can donate to
”nhs charities” that is spread across many nhs and related organisations doing good things.

nhscharitiestogether.co.uk/