Would you donate your money if you’re classed as ‘rich’?

[Familylifeof3]

Hello,
A bit of background - I’m 33 and my husband is 34, we have 2 children who are 7 and 3.
We live around Cambridge and my husband commutes to London every day for work. He works every weekday and sometimes weekends too. He often flies over to America for work. He works extremely hard and does earn a lot of money.
We live in a relatively big house and have 2 lovely cars. I don’t have to ever worry about money and our eldest goes to private school (youngest will too when old enough).
We live a very lovely life and we are so grateful and take nothing for granted. I grew up with parents on benefits who struggled to afford bread most weeks and went to a pretty bad school in a pretty bad area so totally understand what it’s like to be in that position.
I work for the NHS (always have and always will) as I love caring for people.
Recently my husband got a promotion so we would love to donate some of that money to the NHS. Working through covid I am so aware of the struggles and want to support this the best I can.
I really feel they would benefit from a bit of money. And as I grew up with parents who struggled to afford the basics I really want to make sure people get the same care wether that’s privately or through NHS. I don’t feel money should make a difference in that.
Anyway, I told my sister and she looked horrified and said that we shouldn’t ‘waste’ money and should by a holiday house and yacht in America instead of donate.
I hate this idea and absolutely do not agree with that approach. She said we’re being selfish by not offering our children the best start in life!
Just to add my sister has always been a bit jealous of me and has always been funny about how we spend our money (wants to live through us sort of thing).
So do u agree with my sister? Or do u think I’m being totally reasonable in donating most of it?
TIA xx

We are in a similar position op and all will be going to our DC future. Any donations we do go to our home country.

YANBU to donate some of your money but YABU to donate to the NHS. The NHS is not a charity, it's our tax-funded health system and viewing it as some sort of needy cause to be supported by the whims of the philanthropic does none of us any favours.

I would look for a genuine charity and donate that way. But do some thorough research as some are more effective and impactful than others.

I would save deposits for the kids future and then after that I would donate. I wouldn't do the NHS though as it won't go far. Maybe cancer research, a hospice or another illness charity. Or Free a Girl which tackles child trafficking

If you are serious, please consider a hospice! I think it's outrageous that they are charities - everyone deserves amazing end of life care. And the people who work in them are literally angels as far as I am concerned. After seeing the way my dear friend was cared for in her last weeks I would want that for everyone with terminal illness (where appropriate obviously!)

Donating to the NHS would be like giving an alcoholic a never ending tab at the local off license shop.
So your good intentions would not translate to the help you envisage.

It's very thoughtful of you, maybe locate some specific regional hands-on support groups in a specific town, where you know help is badly needed by people with financial struggles.

I wouldn't donate it to the NHS, for all the reasons others have said. Also seems odd to donate to your own employer. You might equally work for free/less!

Donating to charities is a good idea, but I would also think about how to distribute money locally. Do you have a cleaner? How much do you pay? When I had a small salary increase last year it made me happy to pay our cleaner £15 and hour instead of £13. What about very locally? I started helping an elderly neighbour with shopping -- I buy it and take it over and usually spend about £10-£15 of my own money to add a few extra items (or, sadly, just to cover price increases she isn't expecting). I also give away about £20 a week to homeless people near my house. Just small things like that. My children go to a state school so this probably doesn't apply, but I also try to chip in extra for any class donation (eg trips, presents for teachers) and we give £500 a term to the school.

How much money do you have exactly?

Look into health charities/ causes that are underfunded.

Eg pancreatic cancer.

Or

Things that aren't glamourous or popular

Eg
Autoimmune diseases
wheelchairs
Dementia research
Wigs
Brain tumours
Sepsis
Spinal injury
Rare genetic diseases
Gynecological cancers
Endometriosis
Stem cell research
Organ transplant
Deaf/blind
Postnatal illness
Cleft palate abroad
FGM
Bionic limbs
Diabetes

Yes. I would continue to tythe just as I do now on a TA salary.

This is one of the charities we give to OP. Perhaps it would fit the bill for you?
www.mercyships.org.uk/

Definitely donate to a local hospice. They do great work and rely on donations to operate. The NHS is NOT underfunded , it has millions thrown into it every single day. Its poor management and waste that costs the the most money.

Give the money to Jimmy's Night Shelter and help the homeless people you walk past every day in Cambridge.

Take financial advice on the best way to make donations.

And put some in college funds for your kids.
Unless you're foreseeing a future where your work income never changes then save as much as you can for you and your family.

The NHS is a black hole.

If you want to donate to a charity small or large do your research very carefully, as your money may be just totally wasted.

Haven't you got any friends/family that need a helping hand? You might completely change their life if you could give them that once in a lifetime trip or help them with a depot when they were stuck renting.

I was thinking that even if you have a net worth of a few million, it is possible for your circumstances to change.

Tory bots out saying NHS is a bottomless pit.

As long as you are benefiting from the health care, education, law and order etc. in your home country then surely that is similar to donating to the NHS when you live in the UK?

You’d be hard pushed to find areas of deprivation in Cambridge @BirlinBrain.

The NHS should be properly funded by the government; once we start treating it as a charity then we are on a slippery slope. As others have said, use your money for good causes - research into disease, hospices. And most importantly, make sure that you vote for a political party that believes in funding our public services properly - so NOT the Tories.

I’m 33 and my husband is 34, we have 2 children who are 7 and 3.

What happened to your 2 year old and why weren't you on maternity leave through Covid?

Ask her if you offered it to her if she would accept it. You bet your bottom dollar she would!!!

Many NHS hospitals have associated charities - the money is used for "extras" rather than day to day patient care.
If you're donating a sizeable amount, access their accounts on the charity commission website, get an understanding of how they use donations.

this is for Addenbroke's, as you mentioned cambridge:
register-of-charities.charitycommission.gov.uk/charity-search/-/charity-details/5089079

... have you been to Cambridge?

There's huge deprivation there...

Presumably the 2yo had a birthday...