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CF have come to stay, how to handle it

1000 replies

SeriouslyLosingTheWill · 19/08/2022 14:42

Have name changed as this will be very outing.

DP asked if some relatives could come and stay for a few days. These are actually relatives of his ex wife, not blood relatives to him, but he knew them a good few years ago. We live in a holiday type area and have the room.

I didn't know much about them except they were late thirties/early forties, apparently lovely. And have had a hard couple of years as their 9yo dd has been quite ill, but is now in recovery and things are looking good.
So of course I said yes. Sounds like they have had a crap time and needed a bit of a break from it all. Said they were coming just the 2 of them, not bringing their dd.

They arrived 4 days ago. Haven't yet said when they are leaving.

The issue is they are incredibly entitled and I really really am beginning to not like them. They arrived with nothing - not a bottle of wine or a bunch of flowers. not that I expect anything but its etiquette surely to arrive with a gesture when you're staying in someones house for free. But that in itself wasn't an issue, just a little surprising.
They were all smiles and hugging DP, saying hi and basically ignored me for a good 10 minutes, just a little hello after that. No word of thanks for saying we could come or anything at this point either.
They haven't offered to buy any food. Me and DP are cooking for them. Haven't bought any drink, though they've been getting through ours very well.
Initially I thought maybe they are skint. Also on my mind was it must be awful having an ill child and they are perhaps still a bit stressed on this.

A few days in, it transpires that during the last 8 months they have been abroad on holiday twice (just them, not their dd), and a week away with their dd. So not short of holidays or 'breaks from it all'. Plus they are thinking of having their kitchen remodelled.
Still not massively friendly with me. But over the top with DP. Still no word of thanks for anything, not even after cooking a meal.
The wife also put baby wipes down the toilet when i'd specifcally said nothing in the toilet please as its a septic tank and anything other than normal toilet roll blocks it (only mentioend because we've learnt that every time after guests the thing blocks because they put sanitary towels, toilet wipes and god knows what down it, and it costs us to get it unblocked). Her reason was, she always uses babywipes on her face. Well ok, put them in the damn bin then.

Last night was almost my final straw. We went out to dinner. Their suggestion. I had a slightly more expensive starter than the rest of them (but wasn't drinking, so that should surely even out). By more expensive it was about £5 more.
When bill comes, DP said lets split down the middle (actually fully thinking they would say their treat for their stay so far) and they fussed about me having the more expensive starter but grudgingly agreed even though I hadn't had alcohol and both of them had.

I mean, seriously. £5 more, and we've fed them for 4 days, they've drank copious bottles of wine and beer while they've done sod all to help out - no offer to clear up or anything, or help fetch food or drink in. Literally nothing.

If they are so seriously short of money, then don't drive a 4 hour journey and invite yourself to someones house and freeload. Although a kitchen remodel isn't cheap.

I want them to leave. DP is also getting really pissed off with them. They clearly didn't need the break after their shit couple of years because they've been abroad more in last 8 months than we have in 4 years. Plus we are far from rich, we are literally scraping by most of the time. Feel like we've totally been taken advantage of.

I want to find out when they are leaving and I need to try and tell them in the nicest possible way to hurry up and bugger off.
So any ways I can word this, without looking like a total bitch?

OP posts:
PrescriptionOnlyMedicine · 19/08/2022 21:36

Count your toilet rolls, OP. I reckon your CF guests will pack them as part payment for the steak dinner.

TheWayoftheLeaf · 19/08/2022 21:37

Jesús she actually shouted that down the stairs?? You shouldn't have to ask guests usually volunteer! And why would they buy the extras (crisps, croissants, butter etc if they thought you were paying)?

Sorry but after a few wines I'd have been bolshy and it would have turned into a row so well done on the restraint 😂

Caroffee · 19/08/2022 21:37

So they wouldn't have wasted money buying steak if they knew they were paying but expect you to waste money buying them steak as well as four other meals and alcohol?

How do people get through life being so entitled??

Email them this thread when they leave so that they can see other people's opinions of their behaviour and never speak to them again.

Jellybean23 · 19/08/2022 21:37

This'll be in The Sun tomorrow.

Hillsidehigh · 19/08/2022 21:37

I would have thrown them out there and then, they can sleep in their car

NotaCoolMum · 19/08/2022 21:37

Print this thread and leave it on their suitcase in the morning

CormoranStrike · 19/08/2022 21:37

Brilliant! Can’t wait for the morning update

MaggieFS · 19/08/2022 21:37

That's hilarious. Well done OP and DP. The cheek of the woman on so many levels - to think you'd have to ask for help. To think it would be ok for you to spend your money on steak but them not spend theirs. They are CF of the highest order.

Tbh, you've done well to let them stay tonight. If someone had been as childish as that to shout that at me, I'd have thrown them straight out.

MaggieFS · 19/08/2022 21:37

That's hilarious. Well done OP and DP. The cheek of the woman on so many levels - to think you'd have to ask for help. To think it would be ok for you to spend your money on steak but them not spend theirs. They are CF of the highest order.

Tbh, you've done well to let them stay tonight. If someone had been as childish as that to shout that at me, I'd have thrown them straight out.

Mangledrake · 19/08/2022 21:37

Ishacoco · 19/08/2022 21:35

This is the best Friday evening I've had in a long time! Disclaimer: am 25 weeks pregnant and so not able to indulge in my usual wine.

Yes - we need a LIVE ACTION DRAMA section for threads. Great fun. Hope you managed to enjoy too OP Grin

startfresh · 19/08/2022 21:38

Very amazed you didn't react. I would not have been so gracious, although I can't bite my tongue when annoyed.

SeriouslyLosingTheWill · 19/08/2022 21:38

I've actually had a little cry. My emotions are through the roof. Stupid I know. It was such a ridiculous situation.
I hate upsetting people, but I think the line about wasting steak turned my nervousness into anger. I don't actually care what they say about us. If anyone asks I'll send them a link to this.

I'll explain to the DC tomorrow as they've disappeared to their rooms, and i'm slightly drunk, as they had really no clue what had went down the last 4 days.

I won't ask them to go tonight as they have both been drinking, tempting as it is, but I do hope they leave early tomorrow. And don't hang around for croissants. With the posh butter they bought too!

I haven't properly read all the comments I don't think as theres so many, I sort of rush read them, but I will go back over them all tomorrow.

OP posts:
comfortablyfrumpy · 19/08/2022 21:38

You and your husband are absolute fucking legends.

Please let us know what happens in the morning!

MissBPotter · 19/08/2022 21:38

Thank you for updating op. They are SO rude!! Imagine not even once offering to help out, expecting you to cook after you’ve been working and they’ve been lounging about all day, and then still moaning as they had to fork out £100 for a four day break where they’ve been waited on hand and foot! They sound like awful people, feel sorry for their dd who they’ve dumped as well.

MamaH22 · 19/08/2022 21:38

You deserve an award for how you handled this 🤣 can't wait for an update in the morning x

winterchills · 19/08/2022 21:38

They sound awful. I think you need to bite the bullet and get rid of them! Cheeky fuckers!!

winterchills · 19/08/2022 21:39

They sound awful. I think you need to bite the bullet and get rid of them! Cheeky fuckers!!

Twiglets1 · 19/08/2022 21:39

You even overcooked their steak. Let’s just pretend it was deliberate you Legend

WhatTimeDoYouCallThis · 19/08/2022 21:39

Well done! Tomorrow morning will be interesting but already a nomination to Classics from me

Fuckitydoodah · 19/08/2022 21:39

Jeez I am never not gobsmacked at the front of some people. How bloody rude. Well done. Here's hoping they fuck off nice and early. I wouldn't be surprised if you come down to a post it note with their bank details on asking you to transfer the money.

I'd never invite myself to stay at someone's house and turn up empty handed, and then proceed to not lift a finger or pay towards a meal etc.

TheWayoftheLeaf · 19/08/2022 21:39

Jesús she actually shouted that down the stairs?? You shouldn't have to ask guests usually volunteer! And why would they buy the extras (crisps, croissants, butter etc if they thought you were paying)?

Sorry but after a few wines I'd have been bolshy and it would have turned into a row so well done on the restraint 😂

I'd bet they leave before you're up and take their posh butter and anything else they can before leaving.

startfresh · 19/08/2022 21:39

Ishacoco · 19/08/2022 21:35

This is the best Friday evening I've had in a long time! Disclaimer: am 25 weeks pregnant and so not able to indulge in my usual wine.

I second this. I'm a little behind you, but this has made me not want a tipple.

VerifiedBot2351 · 19/08/2022 21:39

Don’t forget that all this time someone else is looking after their child.

EmergencyHepNeeded · 19/08/2022 21:40

I think those few minutes in the garden where you'd asked them to go to the shop but they hadn't left at that point was spent discussing who was going to pay for that meal. I think they agreed between themselves that you fully intended to pay them back and that's why they happily went off.

You don't even know these people! You're never going to see them again. They are not nice to you. Stand your ground!

mmgirish · 19/08/2022 21:40

Fantastic thread OP. You are a legend. Well done for doing that!

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