To think we don't need a formula feeding month

[LilacSky95]

I have seen a couple of mum 'influencers' on Instagram writing posts about how it's not fair we have breastfeeding month when so many mums can't/didn't breastfeed, and we should start a formula feeding month too.

AIBU to think this is totally unnecessary?

Disclaimer - Not looking to start a breast v bottle debate

Why not for formula feeding - some of us positively chose formula - had no idea whether I could have bf but I’d never made up a bottle before so some support would have helped.

Some useful formula questions I would have benefitted from...
Which milks are halal, vegan, vegetarians above but add in milk allergy
That the NHS do not consider pumping to have the same benefits as breastfeeding so after all that effort you basically are considered to have formula fed
Why some babies find even formula feeding difficult and are these red flags
How much formula is ok, if you have a baby that just won't feed.
As for it being easier, I have a notepad full of mathematical calculations for FF because of the difficulties we had with it.
And yes, the stigma absolutely does exist. Pregnant with my second and despite severe pnd and use of domperidone, tears and all the rest, the midwife heard my story, which will be one of the sadder ones and decided to still push breast is best at me.

@Navigatingnewwaters It didn't clear it up easily though as there was so much conflicting advice. This could have been avoided if MWs were allowed to promote FFing aswell as BFing.

Is anyone else confused about this malign intent bordering on conspiracy that MN posters ascribe to formula companies?

They sell a product. Of course they would be pleased at the prospect of selling more of it. But it’s an individual’s choice whether to buy it or not. So what’s the issue? If there was no formula, how many babies would be dead? It isn’t Diet Coke.

The thing is midwives and health visitors don't even need to promote formula feeding. They just need to be allowed to support women who formula feed.

God this is such a small stage of life… once you get out of the baby bubble seriously no one gives a shit either way.

@Wouldloveanother It baffles me too. Though, many things on this site do...

But when you're in the baby bubble it's really bloody hard. And lots of women choose not to have a second baby because they found feeding the first too difficult.

Some women feel the psychological effects of their feeding struggles long after their babies have stopped needing breast or formula milk.

@Wouldloveanother on tv.

I've done both too I ebf to 6 months & then combi fed, no one ever batted an eyelid or made any remarks at all about me FF and funny enough I didn't need help regarding getting started, prep instruction were on the formula tub, I tried a few bottles to find which suited my kids, DD1 like Tommy tippee & DD2 got on best with Dr. Brown. I knew how to wash bottles and Steriliser came with instructions ... anything I was unsure of I googled the guidelines ...

I found bf harder, more intense, but I'm fortunate I got on well with both bf & ff, my major hurdle with bf was feeding out and about, firstly getting over my own reservation/nerves and then dealing with others being uncomfortable by me feeding.

You don’t sound impartial at all…

Which newborn formula is advertised on TV?

It all seems daft and quite the carry on .Who cares how anyone feeds their kid so long as it’s fed. And if anyone needs a month of awareness then that’s just showing that clear advice isn’t found easy enough. Mums should research how to do both and be prepared to do both before baby arrives if they are in any doubt at all about the method they’ll use. And there should be zero stigma or persuasion either way . It’s just a few months of a child’s life that will have no effect on them when they are older and chugging beer with their uni mates so just do what’s easier for mum at that time. It’s a personal choice that’s all . Months of awareness / support make me cringe tbh. Publish solid , concise advice online and people can go there for what they need .

@DocsandSocks

Don't most FF mums choose to do so? I don't see how anyone can say they feel like they're failing (at what?) if you chose it.

If breastfeeding is so easy, they could just use Google.. in reality it's not so straightforward because it involves your physical body. Generic advice only goes so far whereas formula instructions are pretty hard to fluff up.

Not having a go, btw. Seems like mums sometimes their own biggest critics. I don't get the whole failure and guilt stuff.

Why would you actively choose it with no reason? I gave up BF with my first due to OBD, lack of support and a feeling of being out of control, it was the right decision at the time and I’d choose it again given the same set of circumstances. No one showed me how to make up bottles either but it really isn’t the same thing to get to grips with.

Oh and when I went over to FF the only person that shamed me was me.

so I BF for 8 months and bottle fed for 4.

I needed more help with bottle feeding than breastfeeding. Mistakes I made because I thought ‘surely it’s just shoving powder and water in a bottle and feeding the baby?’:

1. I didn’t get why it was taking DD SO long to finish her bottle. Turns out I had the wrong size teat. I thought they were all the same. Who know 🤷🏼‍♀️
2. I didn’t know how long a bottle was good for after making it up, I would Chuck it away instantly if she didn’t drink it all. Turns out it would’ve been fine for an hour or so after.
3. I didn’t know that her poo would look a bit different and panicked 🤦🏼‍♀️
4. I didn’t know ‘paced’ bottle feeding would be better for a baby that had extended reflux

i could go on really. But yes, more awareness of correct bottle feeding procedure is needed.

@Bejeweled A lot of Mum's do choose to FF and some simply do it because they have no other option. I think what people are trying to say (me included) is that nobody should be made to feel guilty for the way they feed their child.

It isn't straightforward to breastfeed but I disagree that FF is hard to 'fluff up' too. I had so many questions, so many doubts, so many 'what ifs' with regards to FF that midwives didn't (couldn't) help me with. Don't get me wrong, I had mostly lovely MVs who were very helpful but no with feeding which is the thing I struggled the most with.

I know you're not having a go Mum's are their own biggest critics but this could be helped with more information etc.

We most certainly did not need a breast feeding month

I’d be inclined to agree with this too, I think the money would be better spent providing better antenatal and postnatal care for all.

@Wouldloveanother that wasn't your question, you didn't specify newborn. I'm so sorry for the misunderstanding! I agree you're quite right - I think that's not allowed.

Every mum obviously feels differently but to me the countless formula adverts do add to the whole 'formula is everywhere and the norm and breastfeeding is not' thing. To me this effect is achieved whatever age babies the milk in the ads is for as it's just another way that formula is promoted and breastfeeding is not so it feels unequal. I respect that plenty of others would disagree though.

Newborn formula (i.e the only formula babies need) isn't but they get round it by advertising completely unnecessary 'follow on' formula. And the adverts all say 'if you're thinking of moving on' as if it is a necessary thing to do. They also show babies that often look younger than 6 months and feed them in a newborn hold. They do try their best to advertise formula feeding of babies of any age. Whether you agree with that or not it is against the law.

I found the main group to make me feel second class for ff was other mums - as this thread is confirming

There is a lot of misinformation though, I remember watching a programme about teen mums and one of them choose SMA as she’d heard it was powdered breast milk and she wanted the best for her baby

I was formula fed and I formula feed. I agree with you.