"Are you getting help with your anxiety OP?"

[rejectshampoodemandtherealpoo]

What help?

The NHS doesn't offer any help. If you go to the NHS and say ‘I'm anxious’ they will usually prescribe you whatever the drug representatives have been selling to their practice of late, usually selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors. They don’t help people with a state of anxiety.
Private counselling is expensive.

Everyone gets anxious. But when it begins to affect your life (again really everyone has periods) then it can be a diagnosable condition. Most people with extreme anxiety, diagnosed or not, are doing something to help, or they are spiralling out of control. I've had both.

But I can categorically tell you one thing that doesn't help; someone asking “are you getting help with your anxiety OP?”
First of all it’s a virtue signal with a connotation of “because I would never let my anxiety take over like this, you're pathetic, as opposed myself who is so well put together”

Secondly, it's akin to “you need help” but then offering absolutely zero help.

It's overdone and we all know what it really means. It shows you give zero craps about the person. If you gave a crap you'd do one of two things;
offer relatable advice or comfort “I've been there” “here's how I cope”.

refrain from comment.

You're showing yourself up.

Yes, this. Anxiety is a medical issue. Nothing pathetic about it but like any other medical issue, you need to see your GP.

thank you for your interesting reply.

I have taken drugs to help personally. I came off them. I decided I would rather have intrinsic than drug-induced change.

I don't want to rely on drugs. All drugs have a level of toxicity.

The one's that get me are where the OP is repeatedly instructed to "seek therapy", often when it's clear from things she says in the thread that her financial situation isn't great. How precisely is she meant to do that then? Is it free?

I actually disagree it's a medical issue.

I think it's been medicalised, but it's a psychological issue and only the existence of allopathic medicine has seen it classified as a medical issue.

It's an issue which sees good marketing of drugs with no "out" from being medicated.

Drug dependency is not the magic bullet people proclaim. I know I've brought up a completely separate issue by adding that in. I'm glad my main point of the post has been acknowledged.

I agree with all of this and medication absolutely helped me, as did counselling which I had to wait a little while for but it was worth it.

Eg-fucking-zactly!

One could put 'if everyone added £1 to your paypal perhaps you could raise enough for a few counselling sessions'

It's really easy to see these types of solutions when you have real life practical experience of living in poverty and toxic stress.

When those things are alien to you because of privilege you put things like 'aRe YoU gEtting help for your anxiety op?" (can't keep that capital thing up)

The NHS does offer help though, some posters have said medication helped them or were referred for therapy. Also private therapy doesn’t have to be too expensive for all posters- there can be online therapy or other options.

I’ve said this comment before on threads where the op does seem over-anxious about something because they clearly need some professional help not just mumsnet to help them next time something outside of their comfort zone comes up

I was with you OP but actually you're coming across as a bit of a twat yourself now. Your subject matter will naturally attract posters like myself who have anxiety.

I'm 3 months into taking Escitaloprám for it and reading your opinions on drug dependency really isn't helpful when someone's trying to claw their was up from rock bottom and can see the light for the first time in years thanks to medication that has worked where therapy hasn't.

My anxiety is caused by 25 years of chronic disease. I take many many drugs to keep me alive. Drugs may not be your answer but they're a life line to many.

When you deal with anxiety your brain races, and if websites are out there where you can ask questions you will probably use many or even all of them multiple times a day to seek different bits of input that you can then put together over time.

Putting posts on here and getting lots of responses IS THERAPY for many people.

And that comment simply derails that therapy and can even have a disastrous consequence on the person's self-esteem if they already suffer.

So putting it really does highlight to anyone whose gone through it that the person doesn't know the first thing about the issue, hence why it's so infuriating.

I don't believe there is such a thing as allopathic medicine, so I guess we disagree. There's medicine, and there is non peer-reviewed mumbo jumbo like homeopathy and ayurveda.

For others who may be considering meds, DD tried 3 before Sertraline worked for her. It may take a little time but they do work for many. As for over dependence on drugs, DH was on Sert for about 6 months several years ago when he lost his job. He went off them easily and has not been on them since.

I'm not denying I'm a twat. I come from a long line of twats.

I've used drugs myself. I am not anti-drugs. I'm just for open discussion and holistic healing. Drugs can be a part of that.

I've been drug-dependent. It is what it is.

Putting posts on here and getting lots of responses IS THERAPY for many people

I think that's a problem in itself. People shouldn't be seeking 'therapy' from unqualified internet randoms IMO.

That's excellent for him and I think using them as a short-term measure can really help. In fact, I know for a fact they can really help as they helped me.

And like with anything, even homeopathy (which I know very little about) if it works for someone, even if it works for the wrong reason such as placebo effect, then brilliant.

Yes you’re right, the comment is often used in very passive aggressive, unhelpful way.

But I don’t agree that there’s no help available. CBT is available on the NHS for anxiety.
Yes there might be a waiting list, and yes maybe it’s not as many sessions as you would have liked.

But that’s not the same as there being nothing available, and to say there’s no help might mean that someone reading your posts doesn’t bother seeking NHS help because they think there’s no point. When actually for that person it might really help.

This.

You're talking as if your experience of anxiety - and what helped you - is universal.

You're wrong and talking like that is unhelpful to people with different experiences. It shames people who were not helped by the things you declare to be THE answer.

I take far more issue with people making absolutist remarks about mental illness based solely on their personal experience.

People should do whatever helps them, and gaining perspective from real world input can be helpful.

Your opinion is valid, but that's all it is. the fact is it helps. My opinion on SSRIs is valid, but that's all it is. SSRIs have helped some people.

Help for anxiety is widely available through IAPT www.england.nhs.uk/mental-health/adults/iapt/ But therapy for complex trauma isn’t and given what you’ve said I wonder if that’s what you’re trying to source.

I don't underestimate anyone enough to expect they would disregard an entire service based on a comment online. I don't think you really believe that's possible either.

‘Are you getting help with that stick up your a’se ‘ is the only appropriate response to this condescending question.

I don't agree with your post OP.
I don't think people who comment such are being unhelpful and as some are saying on here "passive aggressive".
Sometimes you can sense the anxiety in some of these posts and sometimes the OP their-selves would mention mental health hence what prompts such comments. its not done in a way to shame OPs about their MH but rather just trying to help. I'm not sure why you're interpreting it to be malicious.

Here, I agree with OP because I have got so much support from other mothers of DC with chronic illnesses on MN. In a way it is better than therapy. However, I still went to my GP for help. Covering all bases...

I get you OP. Also add to that, suicidal? Go to A&E/ ring crisis line..all ineffective. A&E, monitor for couple of hours, phone number for crisis line and CPN will be in touch, then out the door. When/if they contact, no further help. Rinse and repeat until the person succeeds.

So a person has anxiety and posts something on here needing help.

This is something that is outside of the norm where being anxious (as opposed to having anxiety) is concerned, and the poster is told that this type of thinking is not normal.

• it's not helpful to suggest this person gets help from their GP because their thinking is not normal
• it's not helpful to suggest that the normal response would be nothing because the responder doesn't have anxiety

So can I ask exactly how those of us that don't have anxiety can respond that's not going to upset someone? Of course anxiety is personal but you're not in your right mind to recognise your response is OTT then are you just posting for validation of your fears?

Describe to me how that comment helps anyone.