To think this is hell?

[TimeAtTheBar]

I have posted variously about my job, sorry. This is a bit of a vent and I am taking steps.

I worked Friday 17:00-03:00 (10hrs)
Yesterday 15;00-03:00 (12hrs)
Today 12:00-23:00 (11hrs)
Tomorrow 08:00/;18;00 (10hrs)
Tuesdsy 09:00-17;00 (8hrs)
Weds 12:00-23:00 (11hrs)
thirsday 09:00:18:00( 9hrs)

I’ve had about four hours sleep and I feel sick at the thought of my week. This is not unusual but I don’t often do both 3am finishes which has compounded it. I honestly feel like walking out right now but obvs can’t do that.

I think I’m just after a bit of sympathy, or maybe the wisdom of MN will tell me to suck it up? I’m in bed still, slightly shaky at the thought of getting up and in the shower. I also have a million things to do today, Sunday and Monday are stock and orders so not a gentle day. I earn £10.45 an hour in case anyone wonders.

Nice post there from GrowlingManchego.

Hope you take on that an overwhelming amount of people are answering in a supportive way. Good luck with whatever decisions you take. Maybe make a mental note to come back to this thread in 60 days - I for one would like to know that you're OK but you've no obligation to any of us anonymous strangers 🙂

Oh OP that sounds like a ridiculously hard rota. It's no wonder you're burnt out! If there is any wiggle room in the budget (like not overpaying your mortgage for now) I would look for a minimum wage job that you don't hate, and look for more suitable, better-paying jobs while you have that one. You definitely can't stay where you are. Taking a full-time ASDA/bar job (or whatever) might give you the space you need to recover with less responsibility, and more sleep, to help you apply for something you actually want.

You will honestly make yourself Sick OP. I can do similar hours sometimes but I have a lot more autonomy than it sounds like you do, which makes a difference.

I would suggest you get the doc to sign you off (a twisted ankle is a bugger) for a month OR you do a 3 month mortgage holiday so you can quit and find something else (better paid).

Brainstorm it with your husband - while I understand you have big outgoings you just need to reduce for a short while so you can get something else and take 6 weeks off to put yourself back together. It won’t help anyone if you fall over, and you will.

With all this experience I’d hope you could land more than 27k and better hours, hopefully enough for a second hand runaround car so you don’t have to hang about for buses.

That is a lot of spending money. Is it for essentials or things you like buying? You could cut back if not essentials.

This sucks OP. Been there, in a different industry. Average week there was 80-90 hours. It wrecked my health.

Hospitality has a huge number of vacancies, I'm surprised it's hard to find something else?

Your DH can’t do 90% of parenting 100% housework and hold down a senior full time role

This post made me laugh though. This is what many lone parents do for years on end!

I've worked shifts for the last 20yrs but those are absolutely horrid. Finishing at 3am & going back in on a day shift? Your body clock is all over the place. If work aren't flexible with the shifts, you may have to look elsewhere. Those shifts would kill me!

Not once did OP complain about not having any money. She’s struggling with poor working conditions and Dickensian hours.

Can you afford to just quit your job with no plan?

So glad you're going to take sick time. Having seen two dear friends in hospitality working crazy hours end up with cardio myopathy in their thirties. You really don't want to go there

So you're just bad with money. Stop overpaying and stop with the £400 fun money.

Bloody stupid comment. The overpaying is being “good” or, rather, sensible with money, not “bad”. They can’t rely on the overtime money so they are using it to invest and provide stability for the future rather on day-to-day living expenses. Dropping reliable income by OP leaving her job because they have a temporary bump in income would be being “bad” or, rather, foolish with their money.

Can you post a proper breakdown?

None of your figures make sense. 90k is a huge salary and many families survive on a a quarter of that. You dont need your wage you need help managing your finances.

I think if I was you I'd stop over paying the mortgage for now and look into bar work and if you can afford the drop in wage that would be while looking for something else. Those hours just aren't doable in the long term, you are going to make yourself ill

Also get signed off ill for a couple of weeks if you can!

Not in the context of the op feeling suicidal it isn't. Yours is the stupid comment. Hth.

That was @NumberTheory

Its illegal to make you sign a WTD. You need to join a Union.

To be honest I think this looks reasonable. Your late finishes are followed by late starts. It looks like it must a late night bar or something. Anyway whatever it is it does look manageable albeit brutal with no day off in sight.

The only issue I can see is that you do not get one full day off a week which I think you should get. However if it is a tourist type job so will be busy for this month and then calm right down then I think that is reasonable.

In catering I have worked 6 x 12 hour days followed by a full day off for the two busiest months of the summer season. I have also worked in travel where you did an 8 to 12 hour day plus meeting night flights once or twice a week.

What sounds more serious is that it sounds like you hate it. If you quite liked your job or you felt it was worth it this would be manageable. Sounds like you hate it though.

Grit your teeth and get through it. Spend Monday, Tuesday and Thursday evening looking for an alternative job.

Sounds like your kids are older teens so hopefully childcare isn't an issue.

Do you work for a well know pub chain??

You have bi polar. You have already had one breakdown due to work. You write that you are feeling suicidal. But brush every bit of advice away. Op you will get ill again doing these hours.

I do long hours too- but as the previous poster says it does calm down in September. I do a job I actively enjoy though, and that makes all the difference .However, that doesn’t help you right now. Of you need to go sick, do it. Your body is probably telling you you are close to breaking.

This is so wrong... And illegal...

Wtd does not mean they can skip ALL the rules??

My guess? You're so bogged down with exhaustion from work you can't see it how we (outside your world) can see it....

Your salary is madly low for the hours you're working... 10£ is rubbish in South East.

Locally to me pubs/cafes see offering 13/14 hourly..... There's a massive shortage of staff.

Just take your last pay packet.... And leave...

The company and how they staff it after you leave.... Not your business.... Your colleague.. Not your business.

Give yourself time to think....

If it is SERIOUSLY the case that you can't survive on 90k for a few months in order for you to be happy and healthy... To take stock??

What can you cut down on to stop you having a complete physical breakdown??

I'm assuming a lot of your outgoings are heavy mortgage?

Do spend a couple of hours writing down all your outgoings... I cut £100 just with monthly subs I no longer used... I was working insane hours at the time..
And just didn't have the headspace to step back.

I'm glad your Oh is wanting you to stop these insane hours too...

Please prioritise you and your health!

Good luck!

Right. Because calling someone “bad with money” is clearly you, angel that you are, just looking after their mental health

This is not your problem, it's your employer's problem they don't have enough staff. If they disciplined you for taking your legal break and it goes further then you'll be able to take legal action.

There is a desperate shortage of staff for hospitality work. DDIL, who is in hospitality management, regularly goes on trips round other venues to try to poach staff. So I suspect you should be able to pick up an alternative soon.

But you also need to have.a conversation with management to point out that if they don't do something sensible about the hours of someone like you they will be losing all their staff. Or consider joining a union so that they can do so.

My friend was poached last week. Working at a tea room 9 to 5 five days a week every other weekend off for £25k. Her new job same terms but 30k. Somewhere else tried to poach her but the hours weren't as good for 30k.

Hospitality is going through a huge upheaval. Friends son pot washer £12 an hour at 18