To think after a certain age, you just can’t enjoy life the same?

[Watchingteeandmotogether]

Say…38-40 ish?

I’m 44 and life is mainly good, but I’ve noticed a huge shift in the feel I just feel inside from around 40/41 maybe?
I had my Dd later at 40 and it’s incredible but I suppose it brings stresses with it, worrying about family members illnesses creeping in, worrying about retirement etc.
Life sort of loses that glow, that excite bet and easiness…and fun 🤷🏻‍♀️It just feels like there’s a lot more *Stuff and barely any time

Is it just me?

Yes…not 38-40, I’d say early 40’s really. At 38 I was still travelling loads with not many cares in the world

I’m 27 and I feel a bit like life isn’t the same at the moment. Perhaps it’s the cost of living, mixed in with the pandemic too. A lot of bad news at the moment and a lot of sadness.

I had a pregnancy loss this year as well as everything that is going on, a lot of my friends seem to be struggling with life at the moment too

Di you think you feel like this because you have a small child?

I'm 40 and DH is 51 and we're still very much in the 'loving life' stage.
Although, DH was 41 when we met so maybe that's something to do with it? We're doing what most couple did in their 20/30's

I don't think it's because you got older, more that you became a parent.

Take solace in the Mohammad Ali quote: "if I'm the same man at 50 I was at 30 then I've wasted 20 years of my life".

And I mentioned the small child because that can seem relentless!!

it is more about your young family affecting what you can do than your age, many people in their 70's are off travelling all over the world they are not all on SAGA cruises,
you have a small child 3-4 years old I'm guessing from OP so obviously holidays look different with a small child that goes to bed at 7-8pm at the latest even on holiday, but some small children are more adaptable than others to change in routine and will cope with different meal times others are just grumpy the easiest ages are probably 7-11 or 12 , can stay up later have the stamina and ability to walk up hills etc etc but not teenagers that are bored or embarrassed by you breathing and want to get back to their phone and snap chat streaks

I'd say things readily decline from the excitement of one's teens and twenties andv50-50 was my lowest point.

Then 60 onwards, it's wonderful, better than being a teenager!

I'm 48 and loving life.

Age is just a number.

*Excitement ffs 🙈

I feel like this and I'm same age as you with a 5 year old also.

So much bad news, illness, getting older. It's a constant battle to stay positive

We were away with kids for 2 nights last week and we were so tempted to come home. We were just going through motions. Kids kept us going though & they had a great time

I'm 50 and having the time of my life.

The dc are teens now, and a lot more independent, and fun to do things with.

We are back to doing a fair bit of travelling, as 4 rather than two and it's been fantastic.

Hang on in there, it does get better again.

But after 50 you stop giving a f* so can enjoy anything & everything so much more!

I think it’s more likely becoming a parent maybe? I’m 50 and my kids are older so we’re at a stage where life is becoming fun again as they don’t really need us physically any more .

@BrioNotBiro That’s reassuring to hear! What would you say makes it better at 60 plus?

@Wheelerdeeler Yes, same here, maybe it’s just a phase at the moment, but it does seem quite relentless, like it’s always ‘What’s happened now’ 🤷🏻‍♀️The lightness & fun seem to have departed recently

Think it very much depends on what's going on in your life at any given time.

I hated my 30s and 40s because I was in an awful marriage and had 3 young children.

I had some of the best times in my life when I was in my early/mid 50.

I'm in my early 70s now. It's not all fireworks and excitement but I'm certainly a hell of a lot happier than I was in my 30s and 40s.

I found this book on the topic very interesting.
www.theguardian.com/books/2019/jul/05/happiness-curve-jonathan-rauch-review

I think I'm around the bottom of the curve. I think at this age you can't pretend you are young anymore and although dreams can still be realised with enough effort and commitment, everyone starts to dwell a little on all the paths they didn't take.

But it really is important to appreciate middle age as you don't want to look back in another twenty years wondering why you were a bit miserable.

Noo I’m entering the done with young children phase and it’s great

Sure I’m older but I feel good and care much less about some things I used to

@TheOGCCL At 44?

I think it’s having small children, I’m 33 and I’ve had that feeling pretty much since my 2 year old was born and it’s really amped up in the 12 weeks since my youngest was born. I feel less carefree, I think on some level I’m on permanent alert in case I need to protect them from bears or something 😁 I assume it has an evolutionary benefit, my mum said it improves (but never goes away) as your kids become more independent (or perhaps you just relax a bit haha).

I agree brio!
Kids are adults, we are both healthy in our 60s, and we live full active lives.
Divorcing in early 50s helped....I no longer put up with shit needy people who are miserable fuckers.

Perhaps it is just the parenting thing then 🤣
I have literally been tired and had no energy for 4 years…do you ever get back to the way you felt before?!

I definitely feel like even my late 30’s I was young, energetic and now..my god, I’m just washed up and old 🙈

Agree, it's the young children stage. I'm 52 and also having the time of my life. It's great!

There's a stage with young children that it's just endless and relentless and your freedoms are limited.

And also the dgaf stage at 50 is very real. It's just so free-ing!

I'm 38 and completely relate. The last few yesars have been constant 'whats happened now' for us... a big mix of things but a lot related to illness and new dependence in our parents etc.
I remember reading part of Caitlin Moran's last book where she describes how you imagine once your kids are a bit older you will get more time and energy back but actually it's just a whole new chapter of aging parents, friends getting divorced or in financial trouble etc all sorts of new issues thst need your attention & your care, and I feel like she was spot on.

Getting older sucks. How many pairs of glasses do you need by the time you’re 50 ish? How many glasses of wine can you have? How much sex do you have age 60?
How familiar is it to hear about prostate problems, skin cancers, bunions, Gerd, and the need for early nights every night, by the time you’re 55?
I think David Bowie and Prince got rewarded for their talent with an early pass.