Porn culture has led to women suffering injuries during sex

[Doyoumind]

Apart from all the violence etc porn portrays as normal, anal sex is definitely treated as an everyday thing that women enjoy. I don't personally. I know some women claim they do but I've certainly known men who pressure for it and I'm guessing it's only got worse in the years since I was dating.

This article suggests women are unknowingly entering into something that can cause serious injuries.

www.theguardian.com/society/2022/aug/11/rise-in-popularity-of-anal-sex-has-led-to-health-problems-for-women

Getting back to the OP- the big issue isnt whether some women on here like it up the arse and do/don't know the appropriate risks- it's that porn culture is leading young men to think it's no big deal, requires no extra care and that all women should be up for it and if you aren't- well you are a bit of a bore stopping them getting their jollies anyway they choose. My son is 24 and we have never had a conversation specifically about it- he's a sharp cookie and very aware of the score though around consent in any kind of sex and a very respectful lad towards women . I think it better to have generalised conversations around consent, porn and the fact not all women are up for anything at any time. I think the problem is many parents don't even have those , never mind discussions on anal sex. I think my son would have died of embarrassment to be honest and thought I was bloody weird

“Get pregnant and die” is a lie.
”anal sex carries risk” is the truth.
someone needs a bit of education about what education actually is, don’t they

@AdamRyan

Odd to use the term 'keep' there as this Is the first I've mentioned child birth on this thread

And the risks of tearing can be minimised when giving birth

As can the risks of anal sex

Those are both facts

@TullyApplebottom

As is 'anal sex can feel nice' the truth

You're calling women stupid, that wait to trust their partners before they have anal sex with them

I really don't think she is

Depends who you're hanging out with, I suppose?

I have no idea, I don't usually start on about anal sex.

And we're talking about teen girls who can be vulnerable. Both no-debate and glorious positivity are detrimental.

Obscure matters?

25% of women have tried anal sex. And that's the ones willing to admit it. As we have seen sadly there are still those out there on this planet who would shame them for doing so.

Hardly obscure

So does taking lots of illegal drugs. And lots of people do that and emerge quite unscathed.
perhaps you think we should tell kids that too?

Not really

Thought we were trying to keep women from damaging their delicate anuses

More people damage their bumhole from pushing a baby out then a dick going in.

Which on the most part is preventable too.

@TullyApplebottom

Yes, most modern drug education is around safety and facts

Not scare tactics

Again, showing your age here

Really depends why the 25% have 'tried it'

Curiosity

Because a partner wanted them to

More ridiculously stupid comments

Does it matter

It proves it's not obscure as you previously claimed

@HRTQueen do you not know the risk of anal tearing in child birth is something people can actively try to prevent?

Gosh something else we need to educate people about.

I had a discussion a few years back about this subject with 15/16 year old dd that 14/15 year old ds2 ended up listening to

Dd cried, I think she wanted me to stop talking about bottoms...and sex 🤔

I didn't stop obviously

Watch out @excitingusername will be here soon to accuse you of sexually grooming your children

I beg your pardon

I've not said anything about things being 'obscure'

And the cosmopolitan article saying bleeding is ok is exactly why better information than that is needed and we do have to have these horrible and awkward conversations with our kids - you'd have hoped cosmopolitan included advice on talking to an adult you trust about any concerns given the age of their readership.

What I don't understand is that whilst most on here are prepared to accept there's an avalanche of wrongly depicted anal sex via porn.

And the fear is that young girls are made to feel that it's 'ordinary' practice and therefore don't understand thats it's actually risky and actually a niche practice.

No one has come up with a way of communicating that, given this situation already exists other than those saying 'education'

'Education' has been sneered and abused and derided. In the same way the right in the US don't want eduction about homosexuality saying that it promotes or encourages.

Exactly what do people want to do about this?

The whole 'I like it' and 'I don't like it' is a total red herring. And this is the most abusive thread I've ever been on. But I think Piers Morgan or whoever it was has left the building.

Who cares if you like it or not if your concern is about other young women it's irrelevant.

And more stupid posts

yes I know and again anal sex isn’t necessary for the human race to continue

@RufustheFloralmissingreindeer 'Porn makes things mainstream and then if its mainstream we should be educated on it''

No.

Porn routinely shows rough sex and women being used as passive objects. It shows acts like choking and various kinks (which some people will enjoy but is unlikely to be a mainstream pastime...)

These does not mean that these acts should become ''mainstream'' and that we should just blindly accept them as the norm.

Education is needed to remind people that porn is not real life, to help young people build a healthy sense of self and of their body and to understand that consent is everything and that you should never do something just to please someone else or to conform to the ''standards'' set by porn. The education should also be blunt enough to explain the physical risks of certain sex acts and how to minimise that it is possible and if you decide to do them.

Porn is not here to educate you and your kids or to give you a healthy attitude to sex. It is a product and its main purpose is to make money and keep people hooked on it. Porn producers will continue to show more and more extreme acts to keep people watching and that can desensitise and lead to really unhealthy attitudes to relationships.

Anal sex is not a mainstream practice. Nor is BDSM. Nothing wrong if that is your thing and you have a partner who is into it too but let's stop pretending that they are.

I am seriously fed up with the concept that it is OK for porn to dictate how people should be having sex and that we should just accept whatever they show as desirable and mainstream behaviour...

Getting back to the OP- the big issue isnt whether some women on here like it up the arse and do/don't know the appropriate risks- it's that porn culture is leading young men to think it's no big deal, requires no extra care and that all women should be up for it and if you aren't- well you are a bit of a bore stopping them getting their jollies anyway they choose.

exactly

After reading this thread I can relate to your daughter 😭

On a serious note though. This thread started about young women getting injured and traumatised during sex and there have been some horrific accounts here.

Forwarded is forearmed and teaching girls and boys about consent, boundaries and sexual health must surely be the way the way to go

They need to know that porn is not real and that in heterosexual relationships both partner's needs and desires matter.

People can say that's BS but you only have to spend 5 minutes on the relationships board to see how uncommon that is.

I am seriously fed up with the concept that it is OK for porn to dictate how people should be having sex and that we should just accept whatever they show as desirable and mainstream behaviour...

And how do you counter act that tsunami of porn?

I think there are different ideas about the messaging of “Education” :is it.
(a) Anal is “regularly enjoyed” by some couples and here ladies are some ideas about how you can provide pleasure to your man. or
(b) Anal is a niche practice which those who profit from exploitation would like you think is normal, and that “everyone else is doing it” so that you can coerce/be coerced into commoditizing your own sexuality, to have it sold back to you. By the way, children your age, have been left with life changing disabilities. And it’s nothing special anyway, and who want a poo-hat in their penis.