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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not accommodate Very Important Neighbour's new home office?

739 replies

Knitwit101 · 09/08/2022 14:35

We've lived next door to these neighbours for years. Know each other well enough to say hi, put bins out on holiday, but we're not friends. We've been using our garden in the same way for years. No changes on our side, nothing new.

We've come back from holiday to find neighbour has re-organised his home office and he now sits at a massive (open) window right on the boundary between our gardens. That must have been a spare bedroom before maybe, I don't know. We never saw anyone in it.

I sat outside at our patio table this morning to have a coffee and I could hear every word he said through his open window, could hear every word his colleagues said on their online meetings. He might as well have been sitting at the table with me. Not sure there's much I can do about that, he can use his house however he likes.

Ds10 and his pals are sitting outside at the table trading Pokemom cards. There's 4 of them, they are laughing and chatting but they're not shouting or being silly. And it's a sunny afternoon in the school holidays, they can be outside laughing in the garden if they want to be.

Neighbour has just come to the door to ask me if I can take them inside because he has a full afternoon of work meetings and their noise is distracting him.

I said "what, the whole afternoon? You want them to stay indoors all afternoon?"

He said completely straight-faced "I'll be working till 6.30pm"

I laughed and said "well no, that won't be possible".

At this point he said in a very slow, careful, mansplaining voice just in case I couldn't follow him "I don't think you understand. I have a Very Important Job. These are very important meetings. I negotiate multi-million dollar contracts every day, I need to be able to concentrate."

Seriously? I always though he was a bit of a twat but who talks like this? Who actually says "Very Important" like that? Twice? He has no idea what my job is or how important dh or I might be.

I just said "no, we'll carry on using our garden as we always have. Maybe you could close your window when you're needing to concentrate. And just so you're aware, I can hear you and your colleagues when your window is open, I hope you're not saying anything confidential. I must get on, thanks for doing the bins while we were away" then shut the door.

He's gone, I can hear him on his Very Important Meeting. I could join in, I can hear every word on both sides. I suspect he'll be back, probably when dh is back from work so they can talk man to man.

He's unsettled me though, he was so self-confident when he came to the door, so sure that he would get exactly what he wanted. How do you get that kind of confidence? I wish I had it. Or is it arrogance? He made me think I was in the wrong at first.

We love our garden, we use it all the time. I'm not sure how we'll deal with this one, but I wasn't BU by refusing to bring the kids inside, was I? He's the one who has made the change, not us. I don't think wfh is new for him, he was just somewhere else in his house before I guess. Now he's on top of our patio with his big booming voice. I feel quite sad about it, if he's there all day every day it's going to be awful.

OP posts:
SlipperySlope99 · 09/08/2022 17:46

Ooops defecated 💩

Sierra1961 · 09/08/2022 17:47

Great response OP. Loved the diagram 😂

IncompleteSenten · 09/08/2022 17:47

Don't give him an inch or he'll make more and more ridiculous demands.

A firm no that stays a no is needed or he'll become a bloody nightmare.

ThisWasMeTooo · 09/08/2022 17:47

If he is very important then he might want to consider the terms and conditions of his job like a clear desk policy and the nature of highly confidential information not being discussed in public.

HeartofTeFiti · 09/08/2022 17:48

@RudsyFarmer oh I just had a horrible realisation…I’m a wfh twat 😞 I’m going to keep my windows firmly shut from now on.

ThisWasMeTooo · 09/08/2022 17:48

PS Isn't it about time you had a coffee morning or prosecco afternoon with some very loud friends? 😂

StaunchMomma · 09/08/2022 17:50

I think I'd relocate an Alexa and have it playing the radio all day onto the patio, especially while it's hot. Hopefully then he'll go back to his old working spot and leave you alone.

The entitlement on him, tho!!!

WhoKnowsProbsNotMe · 09/08/2022 17:50

Why on this gods earth doesn’t he just put a headset on 😂!

He’s an arse….were you inconvenienced when you were trying to relax in the garden, yes. Did you go to his door to complain, no. Why’s that? Oh because you are a normal human being who realises other people have their own life going on and it’s not all about you, his Very Important Job must not require the skill set of common sense!

Also the “million dollar” thing just makes him seem like he’s talking sh*t.

To conclude…the crux of the issue here is his inability to understand how to function in the real world. 😂

x

KittiesInsane · 09/08/2022 17:51

we’ve all been told that working where someone could overhear you or see your screen (I.e. in public) is gross misconduct.

This also pisses me off.

DP didn't get any choice about working from home -- his office shut for Covid and was sold off. We don't have a house large enough for him to remain unheard and unseen, at least by his own family. If they would kindly pay for us to have an extra room, maybe a nice little garden office, or, y'know, reopen the sodding workplace, then confidentiality could be respected.

Backtobacknow · 09/08/2022 17:51

He's a knob!

PriamFarrl · 09/08/2022 17:51

When he’s at his desk he’s looking straight into your garden? Draw a giant cock on the patio.

ChampagneLassie · 09/08/2022 17:53

Well done @Knitwit101 i think you did brilliantly, you were polite but stood your ground. Not being funny but if he's that important he should have a better office, ie not one that close to. Neighbours as you say not confiendetial. What a twatt.

If he does come back talk to. DH I'd suggest to him. He gets air con and keeps his window closed. This is a him problem.

BeautifulWar · 09/08/2022 17:53

I'd point out that you can hear everything and company probably wouldn't appreciate employee's next door neighbours being privy to their meetings!

ErmineAndPearls · 09/08/2022 17:53

I once paid a man (a hunky, off duty fireman, actually) to demolish a derelict, brick built garage in my back garden. Although I was quite enjoying watching him swinging his sledgehammer, real life got in the way and I had to go to work and leave him to it. When I got home he tried to keep a straight face while explaining to me that the woman next door had come round to ask him if he could be a bit quieter - she works in a home studio at the bottom of her garden. Apparently he told her that he’d try but that “it’s kind of noisy work”. He completely demolished it and cleared it away in one day.

AcrossthePond55 · 09/08/2022 17:56

I'd want to shout out if he mentions companies & mergers by name "Hold on, wait a minute!! I have my investment broken on the line and you're speaking too quickly for me to tell him what you're saying!".

woodhill · 09/08/2022 17:57

I think he needs to go back to the office then, it's a residential area not a workplace

coodawoodashooda · 09/08/2022 17:57

Has your husband spoken to him yet?

ThisWasMeTooo · 09/08/2022 17:57

Sunbathe topless 😂

Bordesleyhills · 09/08/2022 18:01

One pair of noise cancelling headphones for him... his fault he’s not office based. This is your home not his office

LibrariesGiveUsPower · 09/08/2022 18:02

YANBU.

if he has a very important job he can afford to soundproof his office and instal air con.

TrashyPanda · 09/08/2022 18:02

Teach your DC how to skip - along with all the traditional songs

clickychicky · 09/08/2022 18:03

Nice one OP

unname · 09/08/2022 18:04

/You handled this so well.

I would like to ask him a few questions.

"Important to whom? Not to my family, I can assure you."
"If your job is so important, why are you not doing it in a proper office?"

RudsyFarmer · 09/08/2022 18:04

HeartofTeFiti · 09/08/2022 17:48

@RudsyFarmer oh I just had a horrible realisation…I’m a wfh twat 😞 I’m going to keep my windows firmly shut from now on.

You’re only a twat if you demand your neighbours change their behaviour in their garden to accommodate your important business dealings. If you’re just WFH like a normal person you’re fine!

swimlyn · 09/08/2022 18:06

What a bell-end your neighbour is!

Do update us if he goes for “I’ll talk to the man of the house” jobbie. (emphasis on jobbie)

Ideas:


  1. Do your own loud fake phone conversations close to his window. End with something like: “Yes, CJ. No CJ. Will do CJ.”

  2. Plant two or three eucalyptus trees on that boundary. They grow like billy-ho and will ruin his outlook.