To be annoyed that dss's mum is wearing things i bought him

[evolvq]

Just that really.

Dss is a teen, i buy him clothes / trainers etc, when i picked him up today his mum was wearing the trainers i bought him. He has grown out of them which is why he isn't, but I just feel really put out by it.

Would you be annoyed by this? (Other step-mums)

I can actually she where you are coming from.

when my sister had her first baby my parents and I bough most of the things she needed. Her partners very wealthy parents bought nothing.

when her partners sister got pregnant the pram, cot, Moses basket all went to her. If felt a little odd - like my family was providing all the stuff that this baby’s grandparents and family should have been.

I can see why he gets annoyed if she wears his clothes when he wants to but I don’t get why you’d be annoyed, especially for things he’s outgrown.
It all sounds very petty.

Something off with this post.

YABU about stuff he has outgrown or won’t wear or use. YANBU that she’s taking his current stuff and he can’t have it and he wants it!

What has OPs ex husband and his new wife got to do with this story? So desperate to take a swipe at OP you deliberately misaligned the characters?

I'm an hourglass (just, 34-25-34, 10 top, 6 bottom) and they fit me fine.

Nope she has grown out of them . YABU

He

Did he choose the designer top? If not, could she have liked it more than him so he let her wear it, then he wanted to wear it in front of the giver?

I think this is a nice problem to have, actually. If this is your biggest grief, you are doing really well. Congratulations!

I mean really when you gift someone something it is then there's to do with what they want, especially once they've outgrown whatever it is so he's fine to give them to his mum, whatever.

But I can see why you find it weird and frankly as the ex I'd be embarrassed for you to see me in clothes I knew you'd bought.

theirs*

So stop buying him clothes.

Also, if he doesn't want her to wear something, presumably he can leave it at his Dad's ?

100%.

Imagine the AIBU.

'I bought my son some clothes and trainers and when I went to collect him from his Dad's, his step mother came to the door in them! He told me she regularly wears the things I buy to the point where he can't wear them himself when he wants to and even jokingly told him to tell me to buy X Y and Z so she can wear it!'

Yeah... Absolutely everyone would be totally okay with that... Not 😂

I don't think this is a huge issue personally but I think this isn't really a proper comparison.

I don't buy my children clothes as gifts. I buy them because they need them. I don't think that entitles them to just give them to whoever they want.

But this isn't really equivalent to what the OP said.

For a start, in her first post the OP only talked about the mother wearing trainers the DSS had outgrown.

When picked up on that, she then added more details.

The DSS could only not wear one thing - that the OP mentioned - because it was in the wash.

The DSS could only not wear one thing - that the OP mentioned - because it was in the wash

Because his mum had been wearing it...

And the OP said she is often in his clothes. So it's not one time.

Yes I know but that's only one occasion mentioned here where he couldn't use the clothes that the OP bought. And for all we know the boy had agreed to his mother wearing it.

If the boy doesn't like it, then the OP (or her DP if she feels it's more appropriate) should help empower him to tell his mother that.

Now his feet are too big stick to shoes that will never fit her.

@Svara good for you ? Little bemused at what prompted you to send your measurements tbh

I'm not suggesting males clothes wouldn't fit a women, I'm suggesting that men and women have different body types and clothing is cut accordingly.

I would find the fit weird to me, like I don't have a need for extra space in the grotch area.. ect

Ah Roady, you've got to get with the MN vibes.

Mother filches designer clothes bought by stepmother so stepson can't wear them when he wants to, she's just a modern, chilled, fun mum. And furthermore, the stepmum is a bitch to be annoyed about dressing the mother and probably needs counselling and psychological help.

Stepmother filches designer clothes bought by the mother so son can't wear them when he wants to, cue a long line of mums declaring the stepmum is an unreasonable bitch, and advising they should take the father back to court for sanctions on wardrobe grabation.

It's all very balanced on MN, as long as people can call the SM unreasonable or bitter. Only way they avoid being called that, is if the venom can be moved and direct at the father. 🙄

Just to illustrate that they don't just fit people who are straight up and down. I haven't found they have extra space as my waist is higher than a boy's so I haven't noticed a problem with fit.