Not really my AIBU, but whilst it was quite amusing for 10 minutes the mexican stand off outside my house is starting to do my head in

[quicklybeendrivenmad]

Live in a small village, with small lanes, our lane is pretty narrow but the only straight one that the farmers can use to access the fields at the bottom.

The two farmers who own the land are two brothers who fell out when their parents died years ago, and have not spoken since.

Brother A coming up the lane with his combine. Brother B coming down the lane with his tractor and trailer, neither will reverse to allow the other to pass, this has now been 20 minutes and all I can hear is horns beeping, and the farmers shouting insults at each other via a third party (one of our neighbours) cars are having to reverse back onto the village green and access via another lane.

Something similar happened near us on a country road in Germany, one had jack-knifed and some arse wouldn't allow the rescue vehicle on his land! Guess how long the Polizei put up with that nonsense!

Anyone else hoping they end up in the same cell?

...I'm wondering if a combine would fit in the local police vehicle pound...and what the release fee would be.

Same here, they're the size of double decker buses, they've had to knock on doors for cars to be moved occasionally and at this time of the year they can look very menacing coming past at nearly midnight, bright lights 4-5m off the ground.

I can’t help but feel that the police have been fannying around with not much action here!!

I'm loving every bit of this thread.

Very Hot Fuzz.

OOOH, its like a spicy version of the Archers! Love to know how it resolves.

@MsAdoraBelleDearheartVonLipwig DH had a massive falling out with our local farmer, who likes to throw his weight around because he owns so much land. DH reminded him (and his brother who was with him) that none of us actually own our land in the UK, it’s on a 2000 year lease from the Crown. Said farmer and his brother crumpled.

@nottoday300 my farmers have Welsh names. The tractor driver is called Mansel.

Hilariously evil!

@SoMuchToBits I’m so glad your farmers have Welsh names, we live in rural Welsh farming country, so in my head they have Welsh names too 🤣 Can completely imagine this happening here.

After a Ploughmans and a couple of pints of Scrumpy, how hard can it be?

@SoMuchToBits ahem... Combine Harvester

sorry, not sorry

@Rowanberri I did not know that. Genius. 😄

Oh dear, @HannahSternDefoe I may have to add that to my wish list...

Been reading this thread since the beginning, can confirm nothing was posted worthy of being deleted so assume pp was right that it was a troll

Kinda disappointed @quicklybeendrivenmad went to the pub instead of keeping us updated! So anti climatic. Now we will never know whose vehicle reversed or who did the job!

@SoMuchToBits I wouldn't want you to miss out
When it arrives, you can add a recreation of todays events to the thread!

This is EXACTLY the type of thing Ed and Will Grundy would have done at their worst - and you'd have had Clarrie wailing in the background! I really hope an Archers producer is on MN to direct their scriptwriting team this way, I'm bored of the Caseys and Tom Archer waffling on about feeling like a spare part...

@Blinkingheckythump I suppose it depends if she gets a window seat at the pub with a good view of the tractor/combine/police incident?🤞

What about the "old" Emmerdale Farm? Would Jack and Joe have done the same?

The person who reversed and video footage will be all over the village FB page! We will hopefully be informed.

sorry just got back both vehicles have been moved but only problem is if they get released at same time tomorrow we are back to square one

Never been a troll and find that quite insulting

Majority of my village are over 75 and would hate it being posted although its on my fb page

This thread has cheered me up after a long day getting nowhere fast with work stuff