The Guardian: A sex worker gave my autistic son the gift of confidence – and I organised the encounter

[YouAreNotBatman]

www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2022/jul/30/a-sex-worker-gave-my-autistic-son-the-gift-of-confidence-and-i-organised-the-encounter#comments

Look at the comments, everyone saying she’s a lovely and a good mother.

I’m so tired of this.
Sex works is real work, have OF, be kinky - or you’re a prude, porn porn and even more porn, poor innocent men - they have to have sex with a woman or else….

Hiw can anyone think this is progressive?

That is a disgusting message to send a 17 year old boy. You can buy sex.
Confidence comes from having the purchasing power to BUY sex.

Eurgh.

I didn't lose my v reg til I was 22 and I had to build my confidence in other ways. Still ongoing!. It's just a revolting message to send a young man.

I wish someone had done this for me at 17.

@Franca123 what right have you or anyone else here got to vilify her profession as a sex worker??

@lollipoprainbow

Men paying for sex and the belief that they have a right to it at all times is what's awful.

The second paragraph was obviously tongue in cheek, but I'm quite serious about the first. I see nothing wrong in engaging the consensual services of a SW. To me it's no different than paying for any other service.

Awful, we should never normalise or seek to justify so called 'Sex work'. We should condemn the activity even though not criticising those women who through economic circumstances or other reasons choose to be prostitutes.

"Oh no, I'm not a virgin. My mum paid a prostitute to spend four hours with me so I know what I'm doing".

Yeah, sure that's going to go down well with future girlfriends.

And what's really revolting is that this feeds into the myth that men need sex.

@drawacircleroundit

Why?

Why would you want to have sex with someone who didn't actually want sex with you?

@Topgub and women who pay for male escorts ??

Your two statements contradict each other. If people pay for something, that clearly implies they haven't got a right to it.

@SaltFlakes

How do you know they're consensual?

This is so horrendously wrong on so many levels I don't even know where to start

How has she taught her son about consent and respect when she has essentially paid someone to consent to him?

Did her son have a choice? Does her son understand what he's doing? She's hardly going to turn around and say no halfway through for £1000 is she?

No one has the right to sex, masturbation maybe but no one has the right to someone elses body no matter how much you pay them.

Withholding all the moral argument with relation to sex work there's something quite stomach churning about the thought of a mother flicking through a catalogue of women, chosing which one her son is to lose is virginity to. Shopping for womens bodies for her son like it's his first bike

@SaltFlakes

Huh?

Its the payment that shows the belief in entitlement

@lollipoprainbow

What about them?

YANBU nobody has a right to sex with another person abd she is teaching him that women's bodies can be bought

@Topgub are you equally reviled that men are being 'used' for sex??

All she is teaching him is that women can be bought and are worth less than men

Exactly this.

Framing men's want to have sex as a 'human right' is nothing new though.

@Topgub

Now the question is about specifics. But for argument's sake let's say we can know with high probability that it's consensual, would you then be okay with someone buying the service?

I'd say if an independent advertises on the internet, on balance it's probably consensual.

@lollipoprainbow

Yes.

We can all pretend thar sex work is a valid choice willingly entered into but we all know that's bullshit for the vast majority.

Sex work exists because of male entitlement to own women.

The minority of women using male escorts doesn't negate that

Do you condemn the woman who accepts the payment for sex?

If I would be entitled to chocolate, I could simply walk into a shop and take it. As I'm not entitled, I have to pay.

Only if women are prepared to sell them.

@SaltFlakes

That makes no sense.

Advertising is about getting work, it doesn't mean they're truly consenting.

They could be trafficked and still advertise.

There's no way to know.

And no, I think the presence of payment removes consent so I wouldnt be ok with it even if there was a 'high probability' of consent

Looks like this is a Guardian Australia piece as the the contents were only open between 1am and 6.30am! So that might account for some of the different references in the article.

A friends brother was permitted a prostitute a month he showed us the catalogue he picked the type and social services organised. They met at our local for a drink then went off to do the deed. The lads made sure they were at the pub at set date and time. It was on the level. He was late thirties at the time.

Some folks were a bit aggrieved this was government money being spent others were more charitable knowing that it was his only chance to have sex.

Is it better to provide sex is it safer. I really don't know