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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Husband wants to go to football on boxing day

127 replies

Austin0210 · 28/07/2022 19:43

Disclaimer.... I'm not sure if I'm overreacting *

My husband has a football season ticket which involves him going to games 2 or 3 times a month (usually on a saturday) when he goes it's usually from about 12 until late due to him going for a drink after the game which I'm usually fine with.

We are expecting out first baby in December and has said today that he is planning to go to the football on boxing day (he goes most years) am I being unreasonable to think that he would want to spend our child's first xmas/boxing day with us? Growing up that was the tradition that we saw family and had time together but he doesn't get that concept as his family "doesn't do christmas"

I'm not sure if I'm totally overreacting or whether I am in the right to be upset that he's chosing to go to a football match and leave me at home with the baby (I would probably end up going to my mums or somewhere to spend with others so its not just me and baby) I feel like this could be the start of me taking on the majority of parental responsibilities so he can still live his social life

OP posts:
aggiemay21 · 10/11/2023 14:34

RoseAndRose · 10/11/2023 11:50

This thread was started in July 2022!

Boxing Day football was, is and certainly will remain a major tradition.

Count yourself lucky - the big Christmas fixtures used to be on Christmas Day itself until the mid-1970s, and some public transport (including London buses) would be running because of that

I think the 1970s is long enough ago to not even consider as worrisome, or of any concern to me. I wasn't even born.

aggiemay21 · 10/11/2023 14:37

babyjellyfish · 10/11/2023 11:33

Honestly, I would just say, "Eating Christmas Dinner on Christmas Day is important to me. So either we will host and MIL can come to us, or I will go to my parents' house for Christmas Day, but going to MIL's on Christmas Day is not an option unless there will be a proper Christmas Dinner. I understand she does not want to cook one, this is fine, we will see her another day. Or she can come to us."

And say that every year.

Giving her the choice of either cooking Christmas Dinner, coming to yours, or seeing you on a different day is perfectly reasonable.

Saying, "You must come to my house on Christmas Day but there will be no Christmas Dinner because I can't be arsed" is not.

This sounds like the sort of plan I could adopt. Thank you for your straightforwardness. Thank you

I need to prioritise my needs and my family traditions too.

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