When children get the wrong end of the stick - Light hearted

[Hopeandlove]

So my very intelligent 15 year old told me this morning that up until she was 7 she didn’t know she lived on Planet Earth 😂🙄😜
In her school they were taught to recycle to help save Planet Earth etc and she thought it was a different planet our paper was going to be remade and sold in order to raise money in order to preserve it.

She saw planet earth as this wonderful pure planet that was all green and blue with all nature on it and …. Not us.

We lived on the Ground. She asked her teacher eventually where Planet Earth was and her teacher said here and she got very confused.

She thought planet earth was very small and pretty as it could be held in god’s hand 🤦‍♀️And we had to be very careful it was protected from humans as some people weren’t nice! 👌

probably a lot of truth in that

My son was about 7 I think and my friend and I were talking about birth weights of our kids. He heard me say he was only 6 pounds and he was like “wow! I was really cheap!” 🤣🤣🤣

Just explained to my five and four year old that I was late picking them up because I was looking for documents for Daddy who got stopped by the police and didn't have the correct papers on him - we're not in the UK. Cue 15 minutes of solid questioning as to whether the police are going to keep Daddy and whether Daddy is ever going to come home, which would be sad but also means they get to watch whatever they want on TV so all is not lost. Wish I'd never said anything 😂

9yo DD and I were getting ready for our holiday to Devon a few weeks ago. I mentioned that we’d need to get a life jacket for the dog for when we go out kayaking.

A few days later she asked me, “Did you get Bertie’s Beyoncé aid?”

My dad used to travel for work and I often heard him say he was going to Rugby.
After a few trips I asked him if his team won. I had no idea Rugby is a place 🤷🏽‍♀️

When DD2 was about 6 she came to me a bit panicked and asked if she would die as she had drank some of the toxic water that was in the fridge. I was confused!
She meant my tonic water! 😂

My exh has always been an avid Bridge player.

I can't remember how old my son was but he was very young when I lifted him up to show him the large picture of Tower Bridge my in laws' had in their house.

He looked at it for a little while and then asked 'is that the bridge daddy goes to'?

Ds was asked if he wanted to "stay the night" at his friends house he wasn't sure if he should take his pj's or not because no-one mentioned sleeping so it vould have just meant staying late and going home (he is incredibly literal)

Caught my son, 17, about to go out to a party for the first time, washing out a milk bottle in the sink. It was a bring a bottle party 😂

Ha yes my DC were told at school "tongue out" when tying shoelaces... 😝

Our cat is a hunter and brings in live mice to the house. She will then 'loose them' as so begins a day of torture while she hunts them down.
My (very intelligent and I mean very, 4x A* A levels) said to me when he was about 14 'Mum I can't understand why the mice come into the house anyway. Are they coming in the cat flap? Don't they know there is a cat that lives here? 😳

Just spat my rice pudding all over my phone!😆

When he was about 6 DS2 thought pigs laid sausages, like chickens lay eggs. He was horrified when he realised the truth. I did ask what he thought chicken was and he said "wait... so chicken is a dead animal too?"

I remember my beloved grandmother telling me she was going to spend a penny and getting quite confused when she headed upstairs instead of to the front door to go to the shop! Bless her she laughed and we still went out for sweeties when I asked her.

I overheard my dad talking to my mum. He was worried that he had done something wrong at work and that he would get the sack. I was distraught thinking he would be given some sort of physical punishment involving a sack!!

My older sister has a couple, both from teenage years. First one, a family friend had a telegram from the Aga Khan on her marriage. My parents were talking about how impressive the groom’s parents must be and she chimed in with “I don’t see why - he only makes cookers”, thinking the Aga Khan was something like the CEO of aga stoves.

A second similar one was that my mother was telling a story about how an elderly lady in front of her in a shop had gone outside to get in her car and an equally elderly retainer (in all probability it was her husband but the car was posh and this was the expression my mum used) had jumped out to open the door for her before getting back into the back seat, leaving the front passenger seat to a laborador. Said sister again chirped up with “why does it matter which dog went in the front? Is it because the retainer was old?”

she still makes similar errors of reasoning/comprehension today and is endearingly good humoured when everyone laughs at her.

Hahaha that's brilliant

Daughter wondered for a long while why Ben Hur's mother and sister had to live with leopards (lepers) and also why there were scary giraffes under the bed having been told that that there draughts on the floor which is why I didn't want her to sleep there.

When DS started nursery the lollipop lady was called Michelle but as he was new to the school environment and all the teachers were mainly Miss Something he thought her name was Miss Yell.

My brother used to think Amsterdam was actually Hamsterdam and it's where all hamsters came from

Love this

Me and my dad took my 5 year old son to view a SEN school a few months ago. The deputy head was giving us a tour and said “let me know if you have any questions”. My son jumped at the opportunity to ask her what 9+9 was.

When Dd was 3 she was in the car with both Dh and I when she told her Dad the building we just went past was the baby factory. It was the social services main building, I was a foster parent, mostly to infants, so she had been there with me to pick up and drop off babies for visits or collect new babies to stay with us. We had to explain that they don't make babies for me there.

Reminds me of this old vid, which I always find really adorable ☺️

My lo thinks all clock towers are big Ben

@HornungTheHelpful I’m assuming “laborador” has a meaning I’m not aware of, rather than being a typo of a breed of dog? Otherwise, I’m with your sister on that one.