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Brother-in-law/family have named their dog with my name
142

Raul57 · 25/07/2022 11:45

My OH's brother and I get on but more recently no the case. We used to argue over anything and everything and take the Mick but this was often restricted to when it was only our family their family is there ie my OH and children and the same for him.


BiL retired early at 50 about a year ago and his son and his wife that live in the same house decided to get a dog. This was about a month ago. They've named the dog the same name as mine and I found it very insulting. My OH said they have always loved my name and this is why they have done. When we met last week at a wedding I said to them they could have picked another name out of the millions, they just smiled and said it was a lovely name. They all had smirks on their faces. My children lol initially but they get it and told me to ignore it.
My OH is saying I've always been too 'sensitive' and a 'hypocrite.' EG, I often take the p out of the BiL and his wife but as I said only when the two families are alone

I'm seriously embarrassed, hurt and fear others finding out about this and mocking me.

AIBU?

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Am I being unreasonable?

AIBU

You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

mjf981 · 27/07/2022 09:28

With your updates, I'd say you all sound as bad as each other with the jibes and one-upmanship. I think it'd best if you all tried to avoid each as much as possible (and grow up).

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Raul57 · 27/07/2022 09:37

mjf981 · 27/07/2022 09:28

With your updates, I'd say you all sound as bad as each other with the jibes and one-upmanship. I think it'd best if you all tried to avoid each as much as possible (and grow up).

"grow up" easier said than done at my age and my family had been demanding that for more than 30 years I am trying. I often think about some of my behaviour with BiL and family and it is childish but thankfully no one else ses that other than us and my in-laws. When I'm out and about I'm highly respected for being "mature, sensible" but when alone with the in-laws/BiL, I must try harder as two wrongs do not make a right, many thanks.

Btw, I am cursing myself so being childish/stuipd, upsetting my family and them at times - I need to grow up! Thanks

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Hoppinggreen · 27/07/2022 09:41

Raul57 · 25/07/2022 12:14

Thanks, I've been tempted but it may just cause more friction.
When I said they were smirking my OH disagreed.
To add insult to injury I hate that dog as it's one of those little yappy ones that constantly bark at people and I think they are teaching it to bark at me.
We would not et the dog into our house and I've only been once to their home since they had the dog and refused to go since but not told them.

I thought maybe you were not BU until I read this
They are not teaching it to bark at you, you sound a bit paranoid

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IncompleteSenten · 27/07/2022 09:43

You absolutely need to not react negatively in any way. Be happy. Call the dog mini me and make an extra special effort for your namesake.

That's not what I would do. But it's what a sensible person should do.

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ILikeHotWaterBottles · 27/07/2022 09:48

I'd have laughed at them and been like wow you're obsessed with me aren't you? Going to have to be shouting my name constantly for the dog, every day, for the rest of it's life. Very weird obsession..

Probably also ask bil why he got a toy dog too or does he like carrying it around in his handbag? I'd take the piss out of them if they thought they could do it to me.

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Raul57 · 27/07/2022 11:16

ILikeHotWaterBottles · 27/07/2022 09:48

I'd have laughed at them and been like wow you're obsessed with me aren't you? Going to have to be shouting my name constantly for the dog, every day, for the rest of it's life. Very weird obsession..

Probably also ask bil why he got a toy dog too or does he like carrying it around in his handbag? I'd take the piss out of them if they thought they could do it to me.

I never thought about it like that, them calling the dog my name all day long, lol.
Your post made me chuckle, smile and be happy - I'm done, I will play very nice and possibly mention that in a nice way, "you guys must like me lots to mention my name 24/7," then smile and make it sound as genuine as poss. I will wait for the right mo. Thanks again.

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Recycledblonde · 27/07/2022 11:21

I’ve had a cow and a goldfish named after me. Makes me smile, the cow was a particularly beautiful jersey cow with far better eyelashes than me.

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Blueberrywitch · 27/07/2022 11:24

I feel most sorry for the dog, that they think so lowly of their family pet that they’ve named it to insult you? My dog is like my baby and I took her naming very seriously. It’s an insult to both you and the dog that this situation is playing out!

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StClare101 · 27/07/2022 12:02

Raul57 · 27/07/2022 11:16

I never thought about it like that, them calling the dog my name all day long, lol.
Your post made me chuckle, smile and be happy - I'm done, I will play very nice and possibly mention that in a nice way, "you guys must like me lots to mention my name 24/7," then smile and make it sound as genuine as poss. I will wait for the right mo. Thanks again.

This is definitely the way to go!**

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MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 27/07/2022 12:04

Unlike the voting poll on this thread, most Dsily Mail readers think the OP is being unreasonable

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-11047321/Woman-insulted-brother-law-named-DOG-her.html

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Gandalflight · 27/07/2022 12:16

It reminds me of a story my mother used to tell. We - my big sister and I - are mixed race and at the time my sister was a baby, she lived in a student dorm for nurses. One of the other girls was very hostile in a passive aggressive way and used to lure my naïve mother into confiding in her for then to reveal her secrets to the house matron who was very strict.

One day my mother passed the girl in the hall and she had a puppy. My mother asked happily 'what's her name?' and the girl with an evil smirk said my sister's name. It was meant to be hurtful. It was not a nice gesture. And no, my mother was not overly sensitive. It was just a cruel way of telling her how she thought her baby wasn't a 'normal' white child and more like an animal.

So, though I'm glad you're taking the humorous route, don't for one second think that it wasn't done to hurt you. It most likely was.

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Flipper1234 · 27/07/2022 12:28

I named my daughter the same name we had for a family cat years ago. We joke that she’s named after a cat but honestly I just love the name.

The last thing I’d do is name a pet after someone I disliked.

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Raul57 · 27/07/2022 13:15

MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 27/07/2022 12:04

Unlike the voting poll on this thread, most Dsily Mail readers think the OP is being unreasonable

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-11047321/Woman-insulted-brother-law-named-DOG-her.html

OMG - I'm infamous. Thank the Lord that my BiL reads FT and the Guardian at times.

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KarmaStar · 27/07/2022 13:22

I prefer dogs to most people and even I agree that was a nasty thing to do op💐.
Forget your own revenge,Karma is watching and waiting.💐

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SavageDTR · 28/07/2022 14:05

If you truly want them to change the dogs name all you have to do is say to your BIL in front of SIL, "I never knew that you wanted to be able to scream my name. Kudos to you for finding a way to get away with it." Smile and wink

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CalishataFolkart · 28/07/2022 14:42

We've, me and my OH have had our own problems and now those look as though they are sorted I'm thinking re this and my OH says that I'm a dram queen. I'm not

It is tiring and frustrating when someone appears to have a need for constant drama. It is a weird thing that your in-laws have done but can you see from your OH’s point of view, they might be thinking, “Oh god what now?!” As you say, you’ve just sorted out some relationship problems and now you’ve moved on to the next thing. Maybe that’s why they haven’t stuck up for you as much as you would expect? Maybe they’re tired of it especially as you’re already arguing about events that are months away (Xmas and New Year).

Your decision to approach it with humour is good and the best way to “win.”

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IncompleteSenten · 28/07/2022 17:09

Ah well, fuck em.
According to the daily mail, a woman's place is in the wrong.

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