What age would you let your DC swim in the sea by themselves

[Seawars]

DC are good swimmers though not used to swimming in the sea. Sea quite a long way out and adults sat up the other end of the beach - so DC in sight but as the beach is busy it is hard to keep track of them. Children swimming properly (not just paddling) with body boards etc - though they've been told not to go out of their depth.
What age would you let them do this?

I'm intrigued as me and my friend clearly had totally different expectations about this on Saturday - despite my DC being the stronger swimmers.

Take care they are not lulled into a false sense of security because they are good swimmers. I remember telling DS not to go too far out and he said ‘Why not? I’m a good swimmer’. I also remember him getting further and further away due to the current. He was totally unaware. I ended running in (up to my knickers ) because he couldn’t hear me waving and shouting.

I open water swim regularly, and frankly my answer would be... not until they're an adult! And even then you'd want a bouy/swimming tow, good quality wet suit and preferably be in a group.

For children, I let my 5 year old in with me in the sea. She sees me do it weekly so of course has an interest. She's never out of my sight, never more than an arms length away so I can always get to her. She has her swimming tow, wetsuit and I wouldn't let her out past her chest height.

You also need to be savvy about tide times, currents, water temperature, winds etc.

Blows my mind that someone would let under 10s in the sea whilst they're up the other end of the beach. Obviously absolutely no clue about open water swimming and the risks.

Don't even get me started on paddle boarding...

I completely depends on the sea. Ocean in Australia, at least mid teens. If it was Gulf of Mexico, probable 10. If it was UK, then 12. The sea has so many variables.

Those posters who seem very relaxed about the risk ... I think it's telling that those who live close to the sea/swim in it regularly all year advise caution.

The sea is a beast. Beautiful but deadly at times. We must respect it

My GC ( very strong swimmers age 11) were swimming and snorkelling in wetsuits in the sea on Tuesday; their father and grandfather were in the water with them at all times. (Scotland north coast).
These kids are very hardy and experienced coldwater swimmers in sea and lochs, but they are never unattended and never ever allowed out of their depth except with an adult in the water. (sitting on the beach doesn't count).
DS and DH waited until the children had come ashore before going for a long swim by themselves.

I'm a former international swimmer; I used to do some ocean training too, we always had coaches counting heads from the beach, even though we were better swimmers than them. It's not about ability.

I don't think this is age dependent, but skill dependent. Not just swimming in a pool skills, but being used to the sea, knowing how to identify riptides and currents, what to do if you get in trouble, etc. It's also a trust thing - will they definitely stay well within their depth because they understand the seriousness of not?

An 8 year old could be fine with all of the above, and a 14 year old not.

Also depends on the beach, both the conditions of the sea and who is around.

The oldest is 10? Crazy. I think there must be more to this. Were they in a little pool that sometimes happens in the sand and you were actually fairly close and could get there super quickly if there was a problem? Otherwise this seems unbelievable, I would probably avoid going to the beach with this person again.

I'm so glad I read this thread. I live by the beach and it's normal here for gangs of kids (8 +) to be in the sea with paddle boards, kayaks etc while all the parents chat and drink beer some distance away. No lifeguards or life jackets. This terrifies the life out of me but I have been made to feel like I am the one who is over the top about safety! I suffer from an anxiety disorder so its hard to trust my gut.

@Burnedoutdr of course nothing happens at midnight on their 18th birthday. Bit of daft comment that.
As with everything else, their comes a time when you let go. Otherwise we'd all still be crossing our adult children across the road.
I grew up in a sea side resort with a fierce tide. Sadly someone drowned there only this week. My kids know how to watch for the dangers and not to swim alone (or drunk) because that's all that we've ever modelled to them.

I would never advise a person to swim in the sea on a beach without lifeguards. An adult must make their own choices, but I would not let my child do that.

The hardest thing thing is my children are of the age (12) where they are invited to the beach without me, and sometimes without any adult supervision. So far I have said no but it's only going to get harder as they get older.

I should have added. As a 8 yo DC I nearly got swept out to sea on an ultra safe beach that me & cousins regularly swam in with no adults in with us. The tide suddenly switched on one occasion & I was suddenly been dragged out & getting nowhere fast swimming against it, despite being a strong swimmer. I was lucky that my almost adult competition swimmer cousin spotted me & grabbed me. Unless there's some sort of sea wall protecting the area & you know it well to swim in, its a locally known safe spot, it's really not worth the risk

wave jumping from knee-deep to waist-deep is ok (and more fun) but swimming out of your depth - no way. not until age 18 or older.

I think you're quite naive unfortunately. The most over-protected students go off the rails the hardest at uni.

it would be a no from me.

We swim in the sea 3-4 times a week & DC are 10. They swim in a club 3 times a week & have been in the sea since they were tiny. We use a few beaches with lifeguards and always between the flags. They know how to spot a rip and the basics of sea swimming survival. I do not use this as a substitute for me being there. I think I helped 2 swimmers last summer and 4 in 2019. The sea is a different animal.

I was 36, a very strong swimmer and I got into difficulty swimming in the sea and found it extremely difficult to get to shore because I was swimming against the current. It's one of my "what if...?" Moments in life.
It's scared me and I don't encourage ds 9 to do more than paddle in the sea, even with me there.
I know I'm ott about this but can't ever see myself being comfortable with it 😖

I’m finding this thread very interesting. The sea is a huge part of our lives. The kids sail 3 times a week, we swim in the sea most days in the summer. I have taken part in lots of outdoor swimming events and train in the sea every week.

My eldest is 13, I will always have an eye out and we always swim between flags. He does go into the sea with friends, with an adult on the beach. I always go in first and check the conditions. We know the beach like the back of our hands but we are all aware that the conditions change daily and they know not all beaches are safe. My youngest is 10 we are always in with him and it’s so natural to do this that I haven’t even thought about it. I hate it when the beach gets busy and it’s harder to keep an eye out.

There are two other things, which also terrify me. Inflatable dinghies and paddle boards. I have no idea why people believe a paddle board means they don’t have to wear a life jacket? That they think their little bikini will save them, because they look cool. We have saved people so many times, as they drift and get caught in currents. Also jumping into water, with no idea what’s underneath.

My 2 go on the free RNLI beach safety course, each year. Education and supervision is key.

On a lifeguard beach, between the flags from secondary school age. Other beaches, 16 (to old for me to prevent)

DS9 is a stronger swimmer than me. We're currently abroad and I went in the water with him - didn't let him out of my sight.

dd 22 told me how she swam out to a buoy and struggled last year
i reminded her of this - and she did it again!

i never go out of my depth in the sea.
to your question i guess i would say 12 or 13

It's not just about ability to swim. My brother lives in Cornwall so his children have grown up with frequent beach trips and understand the dangers.

I child who only goes to the beach for two weeks a year is a different matter.

Also the type of sea, the med doesn't have tides

the alam was raised just a month ago by someone struggling to get to the shore on their kayak

54

I was 14. I grew up on the Dorset coast. We would take the short bus ride straight from school, change on the beach or before we left, and jump in. Sometimes we would jump in just our bra and knickers. But we knew the area well and where and when it was safe. Happy days.