to think English weddings are frequently sh*t?

[CraggyIslandTouristBoard]

...and in particular the timing of the so-called wedding 'breakfast' (a term which should in any event should only be used for a morning meal).

Wedding I recently went to:

• All guests staying in same hotel, breakfast (actual breakfast) at 8:30am


• Wedding starts 11am


• Canapes at 1pm EXCEPT we only got served 1 single canape. That was it. And we were on the lookout for them, and moved to stand near the kitchen when we saw they were being served but hadn't reached us. (Quite a lot of alcohol though but really not much fun drinking it because we're starting to get effing hungry.)


• Wedding 'breakfast' scheduled for 4pm, starters actually not served until 4:20ish, main course after 5pm by which point we're beyond hangry/fainting with hunger.


• 8pm cake, followed by evening buffet. Which only gets picked at because we ate lunch so late.


• We ate breakfast in hotel (actual breakfast) 8:30am


• Wedding was 11am for an 11:30 start, though didn't actually start until 12:20ish


• Canapes served about 2pm. On that occasion we got offered a total of 3 canapes. Seeing friends of bride and groom we've not seen for a while, conversation invariably goes (us) "Long time no see - how are you?" (other guests) "Pretty hungry actually!"


• "Breakfast" Lunch officially 4pm but everything seemingly running late, we were on the very last table to be served and got starter about 5pm and main just before 6pm. Dessert 7:30pm


• Pizza from 9pm, plus wedding cake. FFS we only finished dinner an hour and a half ago!!!!

At another wedding I remember something similar happening and people heading to the nearby pub to stock up on crisps to keep them going.

What is with this ridiculous tradition of serving a meal so late in the day with guests having effectively nothing to eat in the meantime?! These were relatively lavish weddings, I don't expect to be fed constantly/repeatedly/anything particularly fancy and would be quite happy with a decent meal at lunchtime and then just some cake (or a cheeseboard or pizza or an evening buffet if the wedding couple is so inclined). The weddings must have cost at fortune and yet at each of them it was clear people were just too hungry for most of the afternoon to really enjoy it.

How does anyone think this is a good idea?!

If you've organised a wedding with similar timing yourself, why?! Just why?!

Thank god we didn't have the kids with us, but in future if we do take them to a wedding I think I'm going to have to bring a picnic for them (and us).

(By way of background I am English myself, and had an evening wedding with a mountain of canapes followed by a full 4 course dinner straight after).

Yes, that was Scottish too, they’re mostly like @CraggyIslandTouristBoard describes but with more glam outfits

It does seem that way. Priorities and all that. Not 'ooh nice I get to go to X and Y's wedding how nice of them to invite me'. Its all about the free food first.

Oh no not another one. Stuff a Greggs sausage roll in your clutch bag.

They seem like early weddings. Most of the ones I've been to start between 1-2 unless super religious. But I love weddings. Being with all my friends, having a good time celebrating another friend, drinking, eating and dancing.

If you don't like them you don't have to go, it's not compulsory.

Hangry is when you've gone way beyond regular hungry, your blood sugar has dropped right down and the table cloth starts to look tasty. It only happened to me once when I was pregnant and the speeches went on too long and were before the food was served for some reason. Fortunately the favours were chocolate and saved me, the whole table gave me theirs!

But English weddings don't go on long at all compared to weddings in other cultures. I'd be bored to tears.

main course after 5pm by which point we're beyond hangry/fainting with hunger.

Yanbu😂

At weddings are shit. A great benefit of having a small child is using her as an excuse to decline as many as possible.
I think I have been hungry/bored/tired/uncomfortable at every one I have ever been to. If I could I’d just go to the ceremony and then straight home.

There must be some correlation with the number of threads on here about weight/obesity. 😂

A great benefit of having a small child is using her as an excuse to decline as many as possible

Think of the number of sandwiches that you could fit in her rucksack though.

I’ve never had to complain about the food. I can’t say the same for the deafeningly loud music later - when there’s nowhere else to go. A sister in law and I once had to go outside in the drizzle in order to be able to hold any sort of conversation.

Last wedding we attended was lovely - afternoon tea (and plenty of it) served on pretty mismatched china, garden flowers in teapots.

But 6 of us (3 old fart/fartette couples) declined well in advance the later dinner and dancing - went back to our hotel for a nice civilised dinner.
I’m sure the young B&G weren’t remotely bothered, there were plenty of young ones - and more importantly we’d put a generous amount of cash in the card.

The Oxford English Dictionary does not record any occurrences of the phrase "wedding breakfast" before 1850, but it was used at least as far back as 1838.[2] This would agree with the quotation above, which suggests the phrase came into use about the 1830s.

booooooooooring

You are Nadine Dorries and I claim my £100.

Haha

It never means morning meal, it means the meal that breaks your fast after sleep. Frequently the morning but not always. No matter what time you eat, if you're breaking a fast, you're eating a breakfast. I suppose the wedding thing it's assumed to be the first meal of the day due to all the hustle and bustle. For me it was, and it was at 2pm.

Most people are grumpy and irritable when their blood sugar’s low.

I think we did ok at our wedding 🤷🏻‍♀️

Anyone staying in the hotel actual breakfast was served until 10.30am.
Wedding party had breakfast buffet served at 10am whilst getting ready.

Married at 12.30pm

Canapes (6 per person) and champagne at 2pm plus finger sandwiches and crisps for the children.

Call to dinner at 3.30, starters at 4pm. Four courses with choices plus tea, coffee and handmade chocolates finished at 6.30pm ish.

Rolls with either bacon, sausage or chips at 9.30pm plus wedding cake and more tea/coffee.

Back in the day we had weddings at about 3, followed by endless photos and often didn't sit down for the meal till nearly 6. I remember one where the evening do was meant to start at 6 and we'd just cleared up from the meal around 8.30. The poor evening guests had been standing around as they weren't allowed into the function hall till nearly 9, then everything had to be finished by 11.45 as revelry wasn't allowed to continue into the Sabbath.

Thankfully things are a bit better now!

Perhaps you misunderstood.

I personally hate anything like this, tedious would rather do anything else. That said, when invited to family or friends wedding I'd never act like I didn't want to be there out of respect but I'd be counting down the time whilst finding ways to amuse myself.

My perfect wedding (if it happens, maybe) is ceremony at midday followed by cake and a toast at church (wedding guests and wider church invited) then off to a laid back venue for hog roast and seafood bbq plus multiple bands into the night, cheese served around 9 with port (big fan of both) will have to come up with something for the pesky vegan and vegetarian I have to invite (can you not invite your adult children on the grounds of fussiness ). My idea daydreaming is might have a sit down meal for close family/friends coming from out of town the night before in a favourite restaurant, kind of American style that. I'm assuming my guests can manage to survive until 3pm with just cake and champagne?

I went to a wedding at around 3ish which I think is a good time as we had a sandwich before we went.

The do after was in a function room in a pub. Very informal- really nice- off speech from family members and friends. There were staff bringing round the odd plate of nibbles but we weren't that hungry and thought we would wait for the main meal... which didn't happen- no buffet, nothing. Apparently the few platters of sausage rolls, chicken wings and and canapés were it. It ended at around 9 and we went back to our hotel absolutely ravenous. There was no mention of the food arrangements and I can't believe that everyone else was in the know!

I love weddings! If it’s an early ceremony we either have a big late breakfast or take sandwiches to eat just before so we aren’t too hungry and don’t get too pissed before dinner.

We got married at 3pm to avoid that long bit between the ceremony and dinner. We sat down for dinner at 5 so probably stared eating at 5.30. I’d assume most people were sensible enough to eat lunch before they came even though we did have canapés.

@gogohmm that sounds great. Where I live in NE Scotland it's very much a keeping up with the Joneses and trying to outdo each other. Some venues charge 20K just for a building then it's thousands more on top for everything.
My daughter had hers in the village hall, all very rustic and flowery and a lot of people said how lovely it was - and it didn't cost a fortune either.

Yeh that sounds rubbish. I think people should send out a schedule of the day so guests know when there will be food, so they can plan accordingly. We did, as we wanted to ensure people ate lunch (we had 2pm ceremony followed immediately afternoon tea (did photos before ceremony), then a bbq for the evening meal at around 7. Cheese tower to graze on during reception. Food is probably the most important guest consideration when it comes to wedding planning.

This reminds me of a wedding I went to a couple years ago - service at 11am so we got to the (freezing cold) church only to find out service was actually at midday but not all guests had been told of the change. Church service finally finished around 1pm, there was then a 1hour drive to reception venue. A couple of canapes each on arrival and then nothing for hours - dinner was massively delayed for some reason (it wasn't supposed to be so late), didn't eat til nearly 9. Everyone was starving and meant there was minimal time for post-dinner dancing etc. Definitely the most disorganised wedding I've ever been to.