Incident at Nursery, how much do I lose my shit over it?

[CerseiForTheWin]

Name changed as Ive been sounding off about this so much that it could be recognisable.

DS started nursery a few weeks back, he’s ten months old. I didn’t want him to go particularly but I have to work and that’s a whole other thread. No family nearby to help, just me DH and DS. He does 3.5 days and I compress full time hours to have him for the other 1.5 days.

I have been thinking they were a bit rubbish with a few aspects, like not really helping him with his bottle so it’s either going all over his clothes and he had a rash on his chest from it, or he’s not really bothering to drink at all. He doesn’t eat much yet really so the formula is definitely still an important part of his diet. Added to that they’re crap with updates, I have no real idea what he does in there all day, all we get at pick up is ‘he’s been really good today’ what does that even mean?!

Anyway, got the dreaded nursery phone call at work on Friday. They emphasised the fact that he was ‘absolutely fine’ but had a slight injury to his fingers as they’ve got trapped in a door that someone opened. I thought we’ll that’s a bit shit why was he near the door but they said he’d just ‘grazed’ his fingers but had had lots of cuddles and was fine.

DH picked up- he’s not fine, he’s had the skin taken off the ends of two of his fingers. They’ve not dressed it or anything, it’s just raw. Apparently it looked worse than it was because he kept putting his fingers in his mouth. Duh. The key worker waved the accident form at DH and he signed it but frustratingly didn’t know he was supposed to receive a copy. She didn’t give him one. He says he just wanted to get DS home but was shocked at how bad it looked. So I don’t know exactly what happened.

have included a pic. Keeping the fingers clean is a nightmare. They’re really sore.

Obviously I’m really angry. I’ll email and have a meeting with the manger as I want to know exactly what happened. How mad would you go if it was your baby, and has anybody had any similar indecent happen at their nursery?

looking at pulling him out to go somewhere else too but slightly stuck for availability for the times we need and location but have started enquiring.

I’m definitely not over reacting am I ? Incidentally I work in childcare myself in a different capacity and in 14 years of that have never caused injury to a child in any way. The kind of accidents I might expect are bumps and falls etc but this is something else.

Really does look burnt! I would say get it checked by doctors, ask for the form and the call OFSTED and file a complaint, and maybe look into talking to LADO as well.
I'd be absolutely furious, and it seems like staff were trying to cover it up and play it all down!

When I was looking for childcare for my first about five years ago now, there was a nursery that had had an incident where a hot water pipe was releasing water into the yard where the children were playing! I can well see how burns could happen in a negligent setting.

I honestly thought I was gonna come in to a thread with an overly-precious mum making a big deal out of nothing, I’m more of a hardy parent than your average mum.

But fucking Norah OP - that’s terrible, his poor little baby fingers!! That is NOT ‘just a graze’. I would accept that accidents happen, that’s life, but how they deal with those accidents is more important and it’s very, very telling that they appear to have downplayed it to cover their backs rather than give him the treatment he needs.

Is there any skin loss on the other side of the finger? I would want to know the exact mechanism of injury. Was it the hinge side, opening side or bottom of the door? I've skinned my own toes with the bottom of a door. I can certainly believe it is door related, but if it is, it is totally unacceptable. I'd make an enormous fuss re lack of supervision and access to the door, with no safety planning in place to prevent this happening. How do they plan to prevent this in future?

They are blistered, that’s not a door injury

Oh my god that's awful ! I'm pretty sure you can lodge a complaint with ofsted. They need an inspection over this.

I would not be angry sorry much at getting fingers caught in a door so much as they have not dressed his fingers at all.

Id be pissed off at them trying to pass it off as nothing. Would make me wonder WHEN would they panic?

I think it's a burn Your poor baby. I would be absolutely furious and I am not one of those parents !

Just adding myself to the list of others saying I can't see how a door could cause an injury like that- trapping fingers in a door usually causes bruising and swelling, not raw open wounds like those. The hinged side should also have a guard on it to stop trapped fingers- we have them on all doors at school that children use.

As someone who, as a child, specialised in jammed fingers/door type incidents, none of my many injuries ever looked anything like that. I'm not saying it wasn't from the door, but if it was, it must've been some force - doesn't look like a typical jammed finger injury.

To me it looks more like he's touched something hot - looks more like a burn/blistering to me.

Either way I'd be going to minor injuries with that - if for no other reason than you would want the injury on record as close to the time of the incident as possible - as well as, of course, getting it properly checked out & dressed. One of my door/finger injuries looked like not very much at all but actually ended up pretty serious and my hand was heavily dressed for weeks.

Looks so sore! Poor mite. I hope he's okay.

I looked at that picture and winced and said “aaargh” aloud. Poor baby how have they allowed that to happen to him.
I’d see if you can take emergency parental leave and take him out of there until you can find a new place tbh. They’d not be looking after my baby again after this.
Definitely get him checked over and report to ofsted.

We were told by the nurse at our local minor injuries to take DD to childrens’ a&e for X-rays when we accidentally shut her finger in the hinge side of a door aged 3 (she had her hand around the door to balance while putting shoes on and I shut the door to keep the dog out of the room without realising as distracted by xh. Felt awful). If the bone is damaged it can cause an infection. With broken skin like your poor wee one’s I would definitely be having it looked at by a GP at least.

Poor little fella...ouch! I'd be raging at the nursery. Surely if it was a trapped finger in the door, bruising would be present? Me thinks something more severe has happened here.

Also, if it was a door trapping incident, then the nursery are negligent for not having door guards on all the doors. But my gut here tells me it wasn't a door..

Your poor baby and you ☹️

That looks really sore.
Accidents happen, but it should have been dressed properly.
I don't understand how a door did that either?

Better communication is needed here. Once you understand what actually happened you can judge whether it was lack of supervision or poor care. Sometimes these things happen so quickly that there's nothing you could have done to avoid it.

It doesn't sound like you're happy with the care and you don't trust them. You may well have to pull him out and start again somewhere new.

Please go to A&E with that - and tell them everything about that nursery

Ex nursery manager of many years here
Report to Ofsted asap.
It looks like a burn or scald I agree. Fingers into staff hot drink left unattended? Hot water being used for cleaning or face flannels left within reach? Something like that maybe and they think trapped fingers sounds less serious no doubt.
Request an immediate meeting with manager. You need a copy of accident report. Do not let on you will be informing Ofsted as this will forewarn them to get their story straight.
And don't send you little bit back there.
Hope he isn't in too much pain.
I'd maybe take him to a walk in centre in case of infection setting in.

Also leaving it undressed/untreated is an issue here too. Nursery in neglect of another of their duties there.

Hope it gets looked at soon so that any necessary treatment can be started.

If it's a burn-how is it likely to have happened?

What hot things might he have been in contact with?

I agree with others who have said it looks like a burn. I’d definitely ask for more information on the incident. Is there a local childminder that may be well recommended and have availability while you search for another nursery?

You need to get a more detailed account from the nursery as to what and how this actually happened - your poor boy!
If it was a door injury could it maybe be from a toy door - like a play kitchen? It looks like his fingers weren't caught in a hinge, but the skin of his fingers were caught and pinched between the gap if that make sense. Which is why it looks more blistered, and wetness from putting his fingers in his mouth could make it peel.
It looks very sore, and I hope it heals and you find out what happened soon!

Sorry I hadn’t seen your update before I posted that. I hope you manage to get something sorted soon and get the full details of the incident. Hoping it heals quickly and you’re okay too.

As said previously, definitely looks like a burn. Actually looks like a hot oil scald I had myself last year