Incident at Nursery, how much do I lose my shit over it?

[CerseiForTheWin]

Name changed as Ive been sounding off about this so much that it could be recognisable.

DS started nursery a few weeks back, he’s ten months old. I didn’t want him to go particularly but I have to work and that’s a whole other thread. No family nearby to help, just me DH and DS. He does 3.5 days and I compress full time hours to have him for the other 1.5 days.

I have been thinking they were a bit rubbish with a few aspects, like not really helping him with his bottle so it’s either going all over his clothes and he had a rash on his chest from it, or he’s not really bothering to drink at all. He doesn’t eat much yet really so the formula is definitely still an important part of his diet. Added to that they’re crap with updates, I have no real idea what he does in there all day, all we get at pick up is ‘he’s been really good today’ what does that even mean?!

Anyway, got the dreaded nursery phone call at work on Friday. They emphasised the fact that he was ‘absolutely fine’ but had a slight injury to his fingers as they’ve got trapped in a door that someone opened. I thought we’ll that’s a bit shit why was he near the door but they said he’d just ‘grazed’ his fingers but had had lots of cuddles and was fine.

DH picked up- he’s not fine, he’s had the skin taken off the ends of two of his fingers. They’ve not dressed it or anything, it’s just raw. Apparently it looked worse than it was because he kept putting his fingers in his mouth. Duh. The key worker waved the accident form at DH and he signed it but frustratingly didn’t know he was supposed to receive a copy. She didn’t give him one. He says he just wanted to get DS home but was shocked at how bad it looked. So I don’t know exactly what happened.

have included a pic. Keeping the fingers clean is a nightmare. They’re really sore.

Obviously I’m really angry. I’ll email and have a meeting with the manger as I want to know exactly what happened. How mad would you go if it was your baby, and has anybody had any similar indecent happen at their nursery?

looking at pulling him out to go somewhere else too but slightly stuck for availability for the times we need and location but have started enquiring.

I’m definitely not over reacting am I ? Incidentally I work in childcare myself in a different capacity and in 14 years of that have never caused injury to a child in any way. The kind of accidents I might expect are bumps and falls etc but this is something else.

I'm not convinced that's a door injury either, where it is and how it appears, looks more consistent with touching something hot and burn like. I'd want them to demonstrate exactly how it happened, where was the baby which door etc, given the age they should be watching or vv close by at all times so they should have seen it happen even if they weren't quick enough to stop it. Id struggle to trust them to take care of him moving forward though.

I'd call 111, they can send you to out of hours for a doctor to check him. Looks like a burn and babies always need to be seen with a burn. Tomorrow I'd be going to a meeting, you've already had your concerns and now this. I'd be seriously be thinking about pulling him but id definitely get him seen today

If he was an early runner I'd say accidents happen (though I'd be setting up a barrier before door to stop it happening again), but can't see how it's not negligence if he's still only crawling unless he's somehow faster than any crawling baby I've seen.

Hard to say how bad it is as scrapes can look 100 times worse than they are when wet. They really should have been covered by nursery to let them dry out.

That looks awful. I would go to A&E. Babies get seen quickly in the paediatric A&E. My baby got burned in an accident at home and it looked similar;m (but not as bad) and all burns in under 1s need to be seen. I don’t believe this is from a door and I wouldn’t send him back to this nursery and complain to Ofsted.

Oh OP totally understand how you feel. My DS reaped his fingers in the door at nursery too but he was 4 and unhurt. My nursery redid that door completely straight away to make sure it couldn't happen again.

Wow your poor baby! That really doesn't look like a fingers trapped in door accident, I think it looks like a burn!

I'd be absolutely raging, at 10 months the ratios in the baby room should mean there's enough staff around to supervise properly, he shouldn't be able to injure himself as badly as that!

I'd also be annoyed about the bottles not being given properly, especially if he's not eating many solids yet.

Meant to say my baby’s burn didn’t look as bad and he got burned with a hot baking tray. Call 111 they can make sure A&E see you quickly. It definitely needs to be seen.

Just going back to your comments about feeling guilty that DS is at nursery OP, please don't!

Poor nurseries are very much in the minority, many thousands of tots go to nursery and absolutely thrive. They are usually safe places filled with laughter, stimulation, caring, nurturing and no end of opportunities for inquisitive little ones to explore under careful supervision.

I thought this too

I think that is a burn too. Makes sense that it has not been dressed.

I would get a doctor to confirm then go back and ask for the true story.

10 months old? He's a crawler or bum-shuffler most probably - shouldn't be anywhere near anything he could get injured on.

I agree that looks more like a burn - certainly doesn't look like an injury you'd get by "trapping" fingers in a door.

I'd definitely get him checked - could you take him to A&E?

I’m sorry this has happened to your baby, how horrendous.

You should take him to be seen by GP (or similar), get it properly cleaned and bandaged if needed, and recorded too.

It doesn’t look like a normal door injury, and like someone said, a burn injury is treated differently.

Hope he recovers well OP, it’s not your fault. I wouldn’t send my child back there either.

Was the door in question an oven door?! That does not look like a squashed-in-the-door injury to me.

I would remove him from the nursery as soon as you have found another. Or look into a child minder.

Kids hurt themselves all of the time and so him getting injured isn’t a big deal but that looks really sore!

Was it like that when your DH picked him up or has it got worse?

If it’s got worse it may be that’s he’s been irritating it or it’s become infected or he’s had a bit of a reaction to something that was put on it.

If it’s the exact same as it was when he was picked up then the least they should have done is phone home and explain when it happened so you or DH could have picked him up if you wanted to.

Minor injuries, meeting with nursery. Early years safeguarding with council and ofsted

I can't fathom why they're blaming a baby for making the injuries "look worse" by sucking his fingers. Of course he sucked his fingers- they would have been extremely painful and sucking them would be the only defence mechanism a little baby would have!

The bottle feeding thing worries me too. He must be being left in wet clothes for a rash to have developed on his chest. They should absolutely be supervising ALL the babies and children during feeding because they are at high risk of choking, aspirating, vomiting and so-on. The staff should be giving him his bottles, or at the very least helping him with them whilst supervising closely.

I absolutely cannot get my head around a childcare establishment not having finger guards on all doors. I've worked in children's nurseries and it's an absolute given that you check and check again before opening and closing doors to make sure a small child won't be injured in the process. I just honestly don't understand how an accident like this can happen - whether it WAS a door-trap injury or not.

Please seek medical assistance for your child, as I know you will. First and foremost they need protecting from infection but also you need this documented in medical records so that any repercussions fall on the nursery and not the likelihood of the injury occurring whilst in your own care if the nursery try to deny it.

Accidents happen, I get it, but there are red flags here which leave me mistrusting the nursery staff far too much to believe their version of events.

I did an image search on google (OP - do not do this) and I think it is possible that their story is correct and that the injuries have been caused by a door. But again I'd be asking why are there no door guards? Or do door closers/fire regulations take precedence?

Definitely need more information OP. Your poor baby. I hope he feels better soon.

That looks so sore and definitely looks like a burn. Combined with the fact that a copy of the accident form wasn't handed over, I feel like they might be lying to cover their arses!

Even without that though, they don't sound great. My little one started nursery at a similar age and was no way left alone with bottle to sort himself out! They sat in a comfy chair and fed him like I would at home. I also got an update in his book at every pick up that listed how his mood was, what he'd enjoyed playing, how long he'd slept for, what he'd eaten and how many wet and dirty nappies he'd had. I wouldn't be happy with "he's been good today" as an update !

What does the other side of his fingers look like? if they were trapped in a door I would think there would be visible signs on his nails.
I think that it looks like a burn/scald

Doors have safety things on to stop jams. I’d be very angry too. I’d buy some savlon amd put a sock over to keep it clear of infection.

it’s going to get dirty once back in the nursery!!!

Lots of good advice for the fingers. Regarding the bottle, my daughter would only take a bottle from me or DH, but my childminder tried everything and ultimately she would have her formula at the childminders in a sippy cup (she was 8mo old at the time!!). Personally I'd be looking for a different setting although I appreciate it's not always a straightforward thing to do.

I've worked in childcare for years and have four dc myself who have all been accident prone and I've no idea how that injury would be possible with a door, also bearing in mind most nursery's have doors removed and replaced with safety gates or doors have guards over the hinge area. Also anyone working in childcare knows to look for little people or knock before opening doors.
I'd love to see the accident report from a professional point of view 🙄
Agree my first thought was burn, sounds totally out there and I'd hit the roof if I thought it had happened but I'm wondering if a worker has tried to straighten her hair in the baby room and this has happened if she's not been paying attention?
A child was burnt with straighteners at my gym one day and this was exactly what it looked like.
If you put yourself in the position of a worker trying to cover her tracks you could never admit it was a burn so might use a door which would be an unfortunate accident as an excuse 🤷‍♀️

DON'T use Savlon or any other greasy cream until it has been checked. If it is a burn it will delay healing. Cool it and cover it if you can, but keep it dry. Get it checked asap

I gasped at the pic when I saw it. I would be going mad about this. Go and see the manager face to face to convey your anger and upset at this.