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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nudity between family

173 replies

Nudityetiquette · 17/07/2022 20:29

AIBU to think that it is weird that my boyfriend let his mum come into the bathroom for a wee whilst he was nakedly shaving his body (possibly chest, possibly butt). Background: Portuguese family where bf is only child (seen as miracle child) and family are liberal and very comfortable with nudity together and talking about sex.

OP posts:
Original poster
Nudityetiquette · 17/07/2022 20:43

Sorry, feel this may have been misconstrued. I was there but had popped out, went to go back into the bathroom before she beat me to it. Only child detail not superfluous as I was saying they're very close and she's still his baby. For context he's 24

OP posts:
Harridance · 17/07/2022 20:44

A man shaving his chest and bum is a bit off putting

Jalisco · 17/07/2022 20:45

Not weird. Few other countries have the same hangups about bodies that the British do. And fairly positive her son had nothing she hadn't seen before.

Harridance · 17/07/2022 20:47

I've wiped the arses of all my kids, doesn't mean they want to show me their genitals now

Thepeopleversuswork · 17/07/2022 20:47

I don't think its particularly weird. I frequently have a wee in front of my DD (11) and vice versa. If I had been the mum and walked in on a family member shaving themselves I'd probably have backed out of the room but I don't think there's anything wrong with parents and children seeing one another on the toilet. I think covering stuff like this up and making it taboo within the family is far weirder and more unhealthy tbh.

floppybit · 17/07/2022 20:47

We only have one bathroom so do everything in front of each other

Nakedfamily · 17/07/2022 20:49

Ew

Scianel · 17/07/2022 20:51

So just to clarify, he was splayed with his bumhole on display?

ElspethBoomingHowsen · 17/07/2022 20:51

Weird post!

Original poster
Nudityetiquette · 17/07/2022 20:51

Sorry this isn't a troll thread, just asking for opinions not judgement

OP posts:
NoMichaelNo · 17/07/2022 20:54

Yeah this happened.

riotlady · 17/07/2022 20:55

I think it’s one of those things that is only weird because of cultural norms. Objectively, nothing bad is going to happen because an adult man saw his mum do a wee, or because she saw his bum. It’s not the norm in the UK, which is why it feels weird to many of us, but why does that matter if it doesn’t feel weird to them?

WorkEvent · 17/07/2022 20:55

I (as an adult) have walked into my parents bathroom to brush my teeth whilst my mum was in the bath, and my dad was having a shower (separately). If there wasn’t a separate toilet, I probably would have had a wee too. It’s not a big deal in our family. I wouldn’t spread my legs and shave my genitals in front of my parents, but I wouldn’t have an issue with shaving my legs for example.

DH had definitely sent his parents photos of him being shaved from head to toe (incredibly hairy man - shaving required for racing purposes) because he thinks it’s hilarious.

steff13 · 17/07/2022 20:56

Harridance · 17/07/2022 20:44

A man shaving his chest and bum is a bit off putting

Maybe it's for his job. Is he a stripper, OP? Or an escort?

CherryRipe1 · 17/07/2022 20:56

No not weird, we all arrived in this world naked. We all walked about in the rude from time to time in my female dominated house growing up. Dad was more 'modest' but generally it was the norm & nothing weird or inappropriate about it. We laughed at farts/bodily functions and I would burst in on parents having a wash/shave and wee unabashed.

Nakedfamily · 17/07/2022 20:56

Very true!

BadNomad · 17/07/2022 20:57

A good mother would have helped. Shaving one's butt isn't easy.

Original poster
Nudityetiquette · 17/07/2022 20:59

Thanks for the replies. He's not a stripper, just a slightly self conscious 24 year old about to go on holiday with friends. Feel comforted by the replies, needed some parent perspective as this wasn't a thing for me growing up.

OP posts:
LaCerbiatta · 17/07/2022 21:00

I'm portuguese, this is NOT the norm! Just to clarify! 😀

Lollypop701 · 17/07/2022 21:01

& BadNomad … made me laugh, thank you!

easyday · 17/07/2022 21:01

I read this that the mum was naked when she walked in ...

parenthood1989 · 17/07/2022 21:03

he was spread eagled on the side of the bath

Was he?

IdisagreeMrHochhauser · 17/07/2022 21:03

I think this is an elaborate stealth boast that you have a 24 year old, liberal, Portuguese boyfriend.... who shaves his bum Hmm

RewildingAmbridge · 17/07/2022 21:04

I will go into the bathroom when DH is in the shower/bath. However I wouldn't if he was shaving his arsehole!! No one needs to see that

DuarPorte · 17/07/2022 21:05

Oooooh. Sunday night got interesting.