To admit I have a problem (please help)

[Mangolatte]

Any advice would be really appreciated!! I’ve given myself a bad habit so posting in case anyone knows of any advice to stop it and get back to normal.

I recently ended up in hospital with a bad ibs flare up. Tried fodmap and all the elimination stuff already. I stopped eating completely (7+ days with no food) because I was desperate to stop the cramps and diarrhoea and I realised by fasting I could control and even stop the IBS. All the staff in hospital were really nice to me but they were saying I needed to eat but I really didn’t want to and i promised them I would start eating normally again when I was discharged and in the safety of my own home.

Once I was discharged, I started eating again. But then I started having ibs symptoms again and I remembered when fasting stopped it, so I did it again. Then when the IBS stopped I started eating again. Ive been doing this eating-fasting back and forth thing ever since then. Sometimes I eat normally and I’m fine, then other days I don’t eat or I only eat 500 calories.

At first I started the fasting thing just to stop the IBS symptoms, but then I realised I had lost weight with it and it felt so good. Not only was I not having cramps and diarrhoea but I also lost weight which obviously I was happy about. The weird thing is I was fine with my weight before it all started and it wasn’t actually what made me fast in the first place, but once I saw I had lost weight I felt like it was an ever bigger boost. My BMI was about 20 before and now it’s probably 18.5-19 so I know I’m not fat, but I felt happier being skinnier.

Just to be clear, I don’t fast or calorie count everyday. I do eat normally sometimes and I’m fine healthwise. But I’m definitely doing it more and more now, and if I’m being totally honest it’s sometimes on days where I feel fat rather than just to control the IBS symptoms. Even on days where I don’t calorie restrict, I’m always counting the calories and I’m always checking the numbers now. I don’t have an eating disorder but I feel like I’ve given myself a bad relationship with food, which is what I was warned about happening in the hospital and I was so sure wouldn’t happen. I thought I had it all sorted and I had finally fixed my IBS by doing this fast/calorie restrict thing, but all I’ve done is get myself addicted to losing weight in the process.

When I was in hospital I fasted for too long and ended up having to drink glucose because I wasn’t well, so I wouldn’t fast that long again as I know it’s unhealthy, but I want to stop the habit altogether.

I don’t want to waste my GPs or parents/friends time with this because it’s not serious and I’m 23 so I’m old enough to sort it myself, but I want to kick this bad habit before I lose more weight or get more addicted and start doing it more often. Does anyone have any advice on how I can get back to normal again?

Thanks💓

So you are better at identifying a good doctor, than a doctor is? Just because you’re a patient (…we’re all patients).

No arrogance here.

The exact opposite - I.e. telling the OP to seek proper help through the proper channels.

And you stop detailing the thread. I have done nothing but answer questions directed at me.

And yet the OP has engaged directly and seems ok…

You may care because you think my manner is bad, yet numbers would say otherwise.

Projection much!

How can I be paranoid about this? Can you imagine in your internal voice, this conversation?

Doesn’t sound like it.

Unless you assume everyone lies about their profession?

Jeez another thread which derails into a fight after two posts.

OP, I hope you’re ok. Well done for recognising this is creeping into an issue. I agree you should speak to your GP and do explain what’s going on in your head.

As well as getting help for the fasting addiction/disordered eating, I would also ask the doctor to reexamine the IBS diagnosis.

My understanding (but I am not a doctor) is that IBS should only be diagnosed once everything else has been excluded. Have you been checked for pathogens in your gut that could be causing the issue? Have you been checked for coeliac or other allergies/intolerances? Candida? If the GP has tested all these have you had a referral to a gastro specialist?

Good luck OP

OP. You will benefit from a face to face chat, possibly some talking therapy and some good dietary advice.

This is very much something that can be sorted. As an IBD sufferer, I have. A lot of sympathy. I really do.

OP I have IBS and I had a miserable life with it during my 20s. This time was also very difficult and stressful time. I ended up in hospital for several days at one point while hosp did investigations, couldn't find anything so they said IBS.

Anyway it calmed down and I only get cramps/pain, loo dashes etc when very stressed or upset.

Its possible to come out other side. Buscopan may help with cramps.

However go your GP because you need tests doing. Food intolerances via bloodwork, bowel investigations etc.

Also the not eating sounds like you are on a slippery slope so pl seek help to nip this in the bud.

23 is too young to be living with so much stress and illness. Get well soon and back to your life.

I hope you are ok xxxxxxxx

Op you have an eating disorder and you need to STOP.
This is not your ibs now.your stress emotional response is now triggering your body I to the symptoms and therefore your ed can make you not eat. It's very common for emotional and stress response to bring on ibs.often more common than food trigger
Because people see a difference they assume it's the food when actually it's the calm they feel(emotional safety) less stress that stopped the ibs.so they continue with the food.then something stresses them in life but lo and behold they wonder what they ate that day.NO YOUR STRESSED. And this is often why more and more peol e cut foods out.ehen the triggers is stress emotional gut to brain axis related.
But now either way you have got into this cycle.and you need to STOP.before this become too Ingrained for that to be a choice!

You will start tp feel unwell.worse symptoms than any you thoguht ibs.malnutrition will waste away your life.and your body.you will die.
When you felt the ibs was gone was the food gone or the stress? Whbe you ate was it the food coming back or the stress and worry over the said foods that bought the ibs back.you see the link,all you've seen is food.whne both times stress has been there and how your body has reacted to that
?t you been programmed to highlight the food here,but look and you'll see the issue is actually rolling around your stress responses and emotional health.
There are ways to manage that.and yes ibs may become a condition that whbe times are tough your stress in life triggers it.but it will be lots les if you get mental health help in how to at least keep it bearable.its a horrible condition.but become disordered is going to make that so much worse and eventually kill you.and it will convince you it's the food.its not.
And you've got the thinner bug now.this is dangerous.youve become addicted to that high.but what is better about losing weight.
You are no different or worthy as a person.your Illness is there telling you so.
You are getting two separate issues now luv.stop this.please

Life didnt get better,ibs didn't, being you didn't get better wheb you didn't eat.ypur stress over all these things in your life did.but this wasn't food that was the problem but how you were feeling.

because it’s not serious and it’s something I’ve (accidentally) caused myself.

It is serious. It doesn’t matter how it’s caused you still won’t be wasting anyone’s time. People put themselves in hospital all the time. So many broken bones, lacerations, even some things like skin cancer can sometimes be down to things people chose to do without realising it would end up needing professional medical treatment. Just because they chose to go rock climbing, drinking, imitating Jack Ass or sun bathing until they blistered doesn’t mean they shouldn’t get treatment. This really is no different. You were trying to sort out your IBS, it’s become something else. The doctor can help before it cause you damage.

I told everyone I felt fine because I didn’t want to cause a fuss but I felt so weird, like I was in a bubble or something.

And stop lying to the medical staff. They don’t go through all that training just to swan about your bed while you’re “fine”. They’d really like that training to be put to the best use possible.

Start valuing yourself and your needs, OP. You deserve good health care to meet your needs. You pay your taxes so you can get good health care to meet your needs. That’s all this is. It’s not excessive. It’s just what you, and all of us, deserve.

The arrogant posturing on here really stunted this thread. 🙄

Hi @Mangolatte

I have been through almost the same experience as you. Although I was not hospitalised.

Mine also started early 20s (I am now 32).

My IBS was so bad that literally any food I ate caused my to have diarrhea. I would be so embarrassed at work that I just didn't eat. And then if I had plans to socialise, I wouldn't eat. I lost loads of weight and loved it and then the vicious cycle begun.

I was like this for a few years. The thing that stopped me was falling pregnant with my first child.

Looking back, I realise that it was an eating disorder and I should of got real help.
However IBS seems to be really hard for people to understand and each persons symptoms are so unique.

Do you think yours could be anxiety related rather than food related?

Wishing you all the best

are You sure it’s IBS? Have they tested for anything else?

@MissyB1 - totally agree with your post. I'm a nurse of 30 years and have met a lot of doctors - good and bad over the years.

Arrogance is not a great trait.

You are so self-aware to recognise that you have a problem, and brave to post about it.
I don’t know the correct medical support you need, but 100% you wouldn’t be wasting anyones time, especially a GP if you went to them and asked for support.

Hi please speak to your doctor to get advice on disordered eating and also a referral to a FODMAP trained dietitian. Please dont see a nutritionist for this. There have been many changes in FODMAPS so you need to check you were given the most up to date advice by a dietitian.
Please dont also send off any hair samples or anything for 'food intolerance' analysis its a waste of money. And as pp said the medical team need to rule out coeliac, IBD etc before they can day its IBS.
Definitely look at stress, it might be worth considering a food and symptoms diary also including stress/emotions. Good luck. You're definitely not wasting anyone's time.

Hope you get the help you need, op. Well done for acknowledging there's an issue.
(Also a helpful bump so that others can come and share their insights.)

Well she's not wrong. Many doctors have terrible people skills, you being one of them. My consultant also had terrible people skills, came into my room before my operation and told me some extremely sensitive news very bluntly, then walked out without asking if I had any questions. I'm still trying to find out more information on this issue and seems to be she wasn't even correct.

I have also known doctors do nothing but incur harm in their patients. Lack of caring or listening being the problem.

Don't pretend you are all angels and do nothing wrong. It's definitely not the case and you know it. There's plenty bad ones out there.

What is your weight now, OP? What food exclusions have you tried so far?

Terrible people skills while simultaneously reassuring the OP who has engaged positively with the interaction. Righto.

Ignoring the derailment, OP well done for making that first step and talking to someone, even strangers on a screen. It’s hard because as someone with coeliac disease, who was ignored by drs for ages, I empathise with how hard it is to be heard. And yes, even though my fingernails and hair stopped growing and I was living on Imodium, there was a part of me that loved being thin. It took a sympathetic doctor and a blood test for something else for a connection to be made.
Go to the doctor, be honest-they won’t be shocked or angry and get well.

I hope OP can ignore the derailment from @Quincythequince who has form for this as well as wilfully misunderstanding information presented. Not doubting their medical qualifications, but from what they've posted, they are no more qualified to offer advice than anyone else.

OP, I think you've been very honest in what you've posted & the desire to control is one that resonates with me.

I think a good first step is an honest conversation with your GP. They can work to address the IBS issues, along with understanding the disordered thinking around food. Good luck 💐

By not eating at all, you’re not eating your trigger foods therefore not getting symptoms. But that’s not sustainable as you know. You need professional guidance on identifying your trigger foods. You need referral to a dietitian. Good luck.

OP, your GP will help you, you will not waste his/her time. He/she will help you sort it out. All the best.

To echo PP, is your IBS actually diagnosed? This is important. If you haven't had it formally diagnosed, then you MUST see your doctor.

What you discovered through not eating is that you can eliminate the symptoms you're suffering from. There are many foods that can trigger IBS.* For me, it's refined carbohydrates that does this - wheat especially. But as you stopped eating anything you don't know what the trigger is.

Fasting isn't generally a problem - lots of people do it regularly - but you're taking it to extremes, which IS a problem. Especially as it has led to an eating disorder now. What you're doing is more than just a dysfunctional food relationship, which you have actually already acknowledged:

Just to be clear, I don’t fast or calorie count everyday. I do eat normally sometimes and I’m fine healthwise. But I’m definitely doing it more and more now, and if I’m being totally honest it’s sometimes on days where I feel fat rather than just to control the IBS symptoms

You aren't fine healthwise; going for long periods of time with so little food will really be messing your health up. Being made to drink a glucose drink will have been because your blood sugar levels (and key electrolytes) were way, way too low - and this can lead to all manner of health problems.

Once I had the drink I felt better but then the nurse had to get the doctor because my heart was going too fast (like 150 or something) but it was all fine and it slowed down I had just got myself a bit worried

The heart rate isn't because you were 'a bit worried'. It was because of the lack of food/nutrition.

You really do need to go and see your GP. Ask at your surgery if any of the doctors have a specialism in this area (sadly, unlike @Quincythequince many GPs have very little training in food, diet and nutrition). And please, talk to them honestly about what you're doing and - absolutely key - the psychological 'lift' that you get from restricting your food.

The fact that you've posted here asking for help is a very good first step - now take the next one! You really will not be wasting anyone's time and you'll be only doing your health good.

*As PP have said, stress is also a trigger, so it's worth trying to identify if that's the case for you too.

And disclaimer: I am not a doctor or medic or scientist or nutritionist or dietician!