To think 7am is a lie in?

[Abottleofjuice]

Or not?

DD wakes at around 5, so when is a reasonable time to wake DH?

Why justify shorty parenting and lack of support in your marriage? I do not understand why people post this, then try to back track and say weeelllll he's pretty good. No he's not. He will not get up in the morning, ever, because you do and it doesn't suit him. He 'let' you get some work done yesterday- by looking after his own sodding child. Woo flipping hoo........and you state he couldn't manage 4 hours with his own kid. So no. He's not ok. He's shite and you facilitate it. Either stop or accept that you have chosen to have kids with someone who is a selfish git you facilitate.

DH and I take it in turns to have a lie in on the weekends. We get until 10.

Same. Except I got 3 minutes more than you. 04:20 every single morning.

DC is 19 now and I still wake stupidly early. They don’t.

The issue here is not the time, is that the load isn’t shared.

I think anything more than 8 hours sleep is a lie in. If you go to bed at 10 then 7am is a lie in.

I use white noise when my other half gets up with kids, blocks everything out. Make sure you take it turns. He’ll get used
to do doing nothing on his
own with her. Just tell him ‘your turn’ and no negotiation. It’s about holding each other up the early mornings are a killer. I’ve been
up since 5am with work (other half away) and I’m ill. I can’t get my little ones to entertain themselves, whoever suggested that has not experienced early wakers!

7am is not a lie in for me, no, but when you've been up since 5 it most definitely is for your H.

Agree with PP that he needs to do more. I've never understood how these men 2ho function perfectly normally in life suddenly become helpless manchildren when faced with the expectation that they care for their own offspring.

The situation needs to work for everyone. DH and I never took it in turns on weekends because he is a morning person. But he can sleep in the day which I can't so he would get up (with DS1, the other two were happy to snooze in bed with me) and then i would take over and he would go hack to bed at some point if he felt tired. It worked for us at the time and meant we both got sone sleep at the weekend.

You teo need to work something out as this is not sustainable for you.

In phone = many typos

8/8.30am

Enjoy your rest.

When we were in the thick of 5am starts we took it in turns to have a lie in but I don't think we actually woke each other up, we would usually just wake sometime between 7 & 9. But if I wasn't getting a turn to lie in the I'd absolutely be waking him at 7, I think that's fair enough!

It was a lie in when ds was very small. Before him, a lie in was more like 10 or so.

These days, I like to be up by 8 at weekends in the summer.

Maybe (probably) some do. But I am not a man, and I sleep much more heavily than my husband, and he often hears my daughter in the night and gets up and deal with her before I’ve even heard her in the night. Obviously, if he’s not there I wake up eventually, but it is perfectly possible for one person to wake up much more easily than the other.

7am is a fucking holiday in the Maldives compared to being the one getting up at 5am daily. If he’s unable to get up/wake up on your morning for a lie-in, he just needs to sleep in DD’s room that night to ensure he does, and you get to sleep through.

If it’s a lie in to you based on your own life/routine then it’s a lie in.

It wouldn’t be even nearly a lie in for me!

Nope 7am is not even close to being a lie in. I'd say more like 9am. But only if you get the same too on your lie in days.

Sorry just read all your responses - your husband is being very selfish.

I mean, no, it’s not a ‘lie in’ as such but I don’t think it’s entirely fair for you to be doing all the early mornings with her while he snoozes. There has to be some degree of ‘fair’, which I see he has taken her now. Thing is tho, it’s not so relaxing when you have to really push your point.
Admittedly I’m generally the one who goes to my son first thing, but I’m currently on maternity leave, DH works longggg hours and DS sleeps well (still asleep now), so it’s a bit different.

I consider 6.30 a lie-in!

7am is not a lie in
But your DH doesn't deserve a lie in. Let him get up with the kids as well.

7am isn’t a lie in, under any circumstances.

It was 8.30am when the DC were younger and it’s now just after 9am and DH is still in bed whereas I’ve been up an hour.

Competitive tiredness is one thing I don’t miss about having young DC.

Think about it - If you are consistently up at 5am 7 days a week and he is up at 7am, then you are getting 14 hours less sleep than him in just a week.

The effect is sleep deprivation over months and years add up. Look them up. Then ask him to do his fair share.

Why are you setting the bar so low for this man. He is a parent.

he needs to do 50% of the parenting.

Teenager through student years lie in = at least 1Pm
Working but no children lie in = 10-11 Am
Parent of babies lie in = until the baby cries
Parent of toddler/ pre-schooler lie in= 6-7am (if lucky!)
Parent of primary age 9am or later!
Camping lie in = as soon as the sun starts to shine!
(Currently have my 10 year snuggled in with me, I cant decide if to enjoy the peace for a few more minutes or go and put the coffee on)

Then stop facilitating that.

How old is DD? You need to wow on getting them to sleep later.

Even if one person is up at 5 I'd still not consider 7 a lie in.

Can you nap during the day?