What have I done..

[Colouringbooks]

I’m seeing a man and recently he’s been quite distant/blowing hot and cold. I’ve questioned it a few times as I’d rather he communicate with me than leave me hanging. I haven’t seen him in a while and I needed to get it off my chest. He said ‘I’m not telling you again madam’ but then I just had to him a message explaining how I feel and then maybe we should just leave things. I said I didn’t want to but I said I feel like I’m more invested than he is and that I felt he was being distant.

He has read the message and not responded. I feel really stupid. I wish I didn’t send it but I’ve been questioning everything. Wondering where I stand. Things were not clear at all and I was fed up of being sat at home wondering what was happening.

Colouringbooks.
Sorry, but It's not beyond the realms of possibility that he doesn't actually like women as people, and actually get's off, on putting them down and hurting them. (The dismissive names he calls you instead of your actual name is a big red flag for that.) He may well even target younger women, as he believes they are more easily manipulated.

I agree with all the other posts! I used to see someone who actually used these very names for me. "Princess" when I was in his good books. "Madam" when I was not. I remember once telling him that I hadn't got a job that I had gone for, and he said "I'm so sorry, Princess". Then I went for another job and got it, and he was actually visibly disappointed and there were no pet names used at all. What you have described sounds like the beginning of what could end up as years of emotional abuse and manipulation (I know, as that's what I ended up putting up with). Always waiting for the time when I felt like he was in a good mood. But the good moods got fewer and further between and I ended up heartbroken and unstable. Please, please, get away from this man. He will let you down and already is! You deserve better, and you have done nothing wrong! Take care.

Stop blaming yourself! You’ve done nothing wrong. He is not worthy of you. Block and move on.

Revolting. Princess? Madam?
Just awful.
Do not contact him ever again. Get him blocked on everything.
He could be married anyway - the only being able to arrange to meet on the day is suspicious in itself.

He is married and was pretending you were a customer or something in front of his wife/girlfriend.

I suggest you boost your own self esteem, so that you truly believe you deserve better than this

All these names mean he doesn't have to remember your actual name or the name of any if the other women he is doing this to. He is not worth a moment of you time or brain space.

This makes me feel really ill.

You deserve so much better than that. I would invest some time and money in some counselling to boost your self esteem and improve your boundaries.

Men just don't sit around wondering what something 'means'. We need to take control of our own lives and not sit around waiting for some chancer to message us.

Block, delete and move on. He sounds vile. Madam??? Patronising git.

Block his number and thank your lucky stars that you've dodged a bullet. He sounds absolutely nauseating 🤮🤮

He sounds like right tosser. Nobody needs that shit.

This man sounds really fucking creepy.

Missy, baby girl, princess? WTAF 😳

you should have nipped this in the bud weeks ago, he sounds repulsive.

“I’m not telling you again madam”

how old is this guy?!

You've done the right thing. Told him how you feel and if he chooses not to respond, or takes ages to respond, (and he's been blowing hot and cold), he's just not that into it. There's nothing more you can do and if you keep on on this track you will look desperate, which is not a good luck.
Move onward and upwards!

A bunch of strangers on the internet clearly value you higher than this slimeball does. I do think you would benefit from investigating why you put up with this and wonder where you're going wrong rather than thinking the person inflicting the poor behaviour is in the wrong?

I'm so glad you're now looking at your situation in a new light. This man is not worthy of you, block and delete and move on. There are decent people out there!

What have you done? You’ve said “next!” in response to an annoying, selfish, disrespectful twat is what you’ve done! Something many, many more women should do and get rid of useless men at the first hurdle - and I include my younger self in that. You did the right thing

He's getting off on the power dynamic- almost little girl/daddy figure and you've gone along with that I suspect because you have low self esteem and are desperate for affection in any form.

I think you've misread his "baby" names for you as a sign he loves you, you've
built this relationship up in your head to something it's not. It's failed at the first test ; you asking for communication and respect.

Well done for speaking up! If you back peddle and grovel to him now you're giving him the green light to carry on treating you like crap.

'madam' and 'little princess'... is he your parent or from the 1700s?

Those are massively condosending to a fully grown woman, I however call my baby little princess all the time. The only time I ever here madam is again when people refer to an independant or stubborn young girl as a 'little madam'.

What's the age gap? It sounds creepy!

Ugh, regardless of the cutesy names, it shouldn't be this hard this early. Massive red flags.

But be aware, he will be back promising the world (potentially via a new number after they've been blocked as a couple have done with me). As a friend once said "it's easier to fish the same hole" - ugh :/.

He sounds like a total creep.

You don’t get your value from his interest levels in you and if you do….then yeah that’s something to work on.

What a dramatic thread title 🙄

You simply picked some low value cock. Not worth a second thought. Do better.

Get some self respect. He has treated you badly so does not deserve your heart or headspace. Move on.

Does he even know your name?
Get rid OP he is a player. He sounds like a grade one arsehole.