This has only just dawned on me..

[HowWillIKnow247]

I'm heavily pregnant - baby is due any day now.

Although we've joked about it, it's only just really dawned on me how DP and I will never have the life again we do now, where we can just casually decide what we want to do in the evening or at weekends.

We've had fertility treatment for years and this is a much wanted baby. We are both over the moon and are so excited this is finally happening. We're so looking forward to everything we'll get to do as a family.

But it just dawned on me .. are the days gone where we just say "fancy going cinema this weekend?"

When I mentioned this scenario to DP, the response was "well we can't really because we can't take a baby into a cinema".

It's made me think about all the other things we do and places we go quite spontaneously.
(We've been together 10 years so it's always been just us and the dog).

Are there things you still do like this that haven't been changed so much after having a baby or did everything just completely change and you can't remember what a cinema looks like?!

@waveyourpompoms

because you make it sound like going out with a baby is like handling a live Grenade.

While some babies certainly can be unpredictable- not all are as you describe. Mine is placid and happy enough to be absolutely no trouble at all out in public in restaurants etc- I don’t take him to the cinema as it’s too loud for him and bored, the films are too long, but i did take him to a family member’s classical music concert when he was eight months old. I sat at the back near the door and would have nipped out if he’d made a sound, but I didn’t need to. it depends on the baby but some are absolutely manageable and a pleasure to take out and about, and I’ve met lots, as I’ve been a nanny for 11 years. He’s been on trains and tubes and buses since he was tiny, to museums and days out and the odd overnight stay and basically just enjoying maternity leave together.

As for leaving babies with people- you do realise many women have to go back to work around the nine month mark? What do you think they do? Plus of course i trust my family to have him while we enjoy the odd night out (not often as they’re all few hours away) it benefits us, the baby as he is confident being left, and it’s great for his bond with his grandparents. His sleep routine and feeding are no barrier to these things.

So no, my life certainly isn’t over. It’s different and I’m more tired, but we have a lovely time together.

Tbh it depends on how much childcare you have. I have friends whose lives didn't change that much because they had family who loved to babysit all the time.
My family don't babysit very often and DH's parents will only babysit once in a blue moon so we can't do things on a whim anymore unless we bring the kids with us.

I’ve taken newborns to cinemas / they sleep through anything.,

Definitely wish I’d had the chance to do this when he was a newborn, cinemas hadn’t opened up properly back then.

You can go to the cinema with your baby when they are tiny. My youngest only started being a pain at about 3 years old regarding cinema. You can take a baby to a party, to a restaurant, pub etc. life isn’t going to end just change slightly.

Omg! I took my son while he was 3 months with the headphone protectors to watch the Tom and Jerry film you can absolutely do things like this but you’ll be limited to ‘family fun’ days unless you can get a babysitter. Get the baby used to going to restaurants early it can be fun!

And don’t forget what hormones will do to you, you might end up enjoying more showing your child the penguins in a zoo than a lovely dinner in a Michelin starred restaurant 🙂

It's true that your lives will never be the same again after you've become parents. Of course, you will go out to the cinema and other places in due course, but you will be someone's mum and dad for the rest of your lives.

There'll be good times and not-so-good times. There may be times when you experience a joy, love and happiness that you never thought possible. There may also be times when wish you'd never had children and you wish you could recapture your carefree, child free days.

You've taken a step in a direction that has no option to go back. Just go with the flow and enjoy the ride!