I can’t go on like this (Money related)

[CantAffordToWork]

My ex hasn’t paid maintenance again, it was due on Tuesday but as always right before my weekend with my DD he hasn’t paid.

CMS are as useless as always and say he has 14 work days to pay until they’ll take action, and last time that action took 3 months because ex told me unless I called them off he won’t pay at all then paid at the last minute to stop them taking it from his wages.

I have enough fuel in my car to get me to the garage, the little bit of money I have left over I can choose to either feed DD with or put fuel in my car so I can get to work next week.

No public transport no family. They basically deserted me after I split with Ex telling me I bought it on myself as they told me not to move in with him.
We split due to his violence and control.

Luckily I can work from home and my boss will insist I feed my DD but if it carries on beyond payday I won’t even have that option because my internet will get cut off as will my phone. I could walk to the office but I owe the wrap around club I use money so can't do that until I've paid them back as they won't take DD (work is 8 miles away, so I'd have to leave at 7.45 latest to get there in time, school starts at 9.10)

Once fuel is taken into account I work for just under min wage. I can’t move closer to work due to the CAO for contact saying I have to live within 10 minutes drive of ExH. (Work is min wage only)

I’m looking for a closer job but I’m over qualified for shop work and have medical issues that rule out care work and cleaning

I’m basically at the point where it’s not financially possible for me to work due to the maintenance. I already lived pay day to pay day before the cost of living, fuel and energy went up.

I’m just moaning really. It seems unfair that Ex swans around in a brand new car living in a house paid for by his family.

I am at the point where I am considering whether living with her dad (the ex mentioned in this thread) would be best for my DD as I just can't afford to carry on like this.

I am very sorry OP

This is a longer term thing, but is there anyway to increase your earnings? Could you talk to your boss? Or apply for higher paid jobs? What do you do?

I’m sorry OP - horrible choices.

Just to have in your back pocket, there is an amazing charity called Depher who can provide supermarket gift vouchers / or order a shop to help people in the most need (with children to feed). Something to keep in your back pocket if things get really desperate. Appreciate this is a sticking plaster though. Info@depher and they have a website.

I'm sorry you are going through this and without family support. He shouldn't have a 14 day window to pay when he's done this before it's a control tactic.
Please don't think your DD will be better with him, he clearly isn't thinking of her best interests or he would make sure he paid on time. You sound like a great mum. I hope you work something out.

Ask for a pay rise - you may not get it but there's zero downside in asking

Simplify your CV - get rid of anything that makes you appear over qualified or indicates you will leave if you get a better offer

Do a rec of every single outgoing you have and switch providers for a better deal

Sign up to the survey sites - even 1 or 2 should get you vouchers for £10 or £20 towards the shopping bill

What is the matter with you lot. This girl doesn’t need criticism about her choice of employment or even advise on how to get a better paid job at this point. She needs help and advise on how to feed her child this week. And empathy. I’m sorry I’ve never needed these services so I’m sorry that I can’t advise, but I am sending hugs. Please don’t do what you mentioned earlier and even consider returning to live with this arsehole of a man, this is not going benefit your child !